21/05/2012 EastEnders

# Hey, little sister

# What have you done?

# Hey, little sister Who's the only one... #

Oi, oi.

MUFFLED MUSIC CONTINUES

# It's a nice day for a white wedding... #

What on earth are you doing?

Practising for the wedding. Be careful of my record.

-You're not playing that at the wedding.

-Yeah. Billy Idol. Legend.

Ian, I'm not so sure, you know. It's meant to be a first dance.

I don't even think I'd know how to dance to that.

Not without a pole.

-That's enough.

-And why is there a for sale sign outside the house?

Because the house is for sale? I did tell you.

-I didn't think you meant it.

-Well, now you know I do, OK?

The Registry Office had a cancellation for Friday.

The estate agent's lining up viewings. Things are coming together.

I'm in the middle of my exams. This is one of the most important times of my life.

Why are you doing this to me?!

Lucy, it's not all about you, OK?

It's about all of us. Me and Mandy'll be married Friday.

The estate agent will have sold the house,

we'll ALL be moving onto bigger and better things. OK?

I don't understand. What is the rush?

-What is so urgent that you have to jeopardise my future?

-There is no rush. OK?

There is no panic. Tell you what, it is like the great man said, OK?

Nice day to start again.

-I was not gawping, all right?

-If it's being flaunted...

It's not being flaunted, is it?

-HE SIGHS

-While the Kat's away...

Michael, Kat's not away, is she?

She's not living it large in Marbella, tanning herself day after day, is she?

She's looking after her dad. Her sick dad.

-All right.

-And Tommy.

-Listen to me. Could be worse, couldn't it?

-It's worse.

Whoa, whoa, whoa. Where's the fire?

Up Mo's backside if she's not careful. She finished all the milk.

-Crying over spilt milk, eh?

-Do I look like I'm crying? I'm going to get more.

Babe, listen. Don't worry about it. Take some from the pub's store.

Can't have a young girl going hungry, can we?

-Sorry, I've got it.

-No, no, I'll get it.

HE CHUCKLES

Thanks.

-Alfie?

-Jean, you've got a habit of sneaking up on people, darling.

I didn't mean to sneak. This came for you.

Jean, what you doing, sweetheart?

This is my personal credit card statement.

I know I opened it by mistake. I'm so sorry.

You've missed a payment, Alfie.

Yeah, don't worry about it. I'll take care of it.

You shouldn't miss payments, Alfie. The interest...

It was either this or the weekly shop. All right?

-Does Kat know?

-Kat's not here!

I'll take care of it. It'll be fine.

I was 13 when this came out in 1982.

D'you know what, I didn't just like Billy Idol, right?

I wanted to be Billy Idol.

There was this girl at school, Sally Bateman.

Thinking about it, she looked a bit like your mum.

-I didn't half have the hots for her...

-Dad.

I always reckoned I was going to marry Sally Bateman,

and Billy Idol was going to be play White Wedding at our wedding.

-Why are you telling me this?

-Dunno.

Everything just seemed simpler back then. Cooler.

Is that what you want? To be cool?

No.

Nah, not any more.

What do you want, then?

I want to be happy.

I want to be safe.

You know, running away isn't going to make you happy.

Who says I'm running away?

The for sale sign. This marriage.

Leaving home, your business, friends and family.

The business will still be here and my family's coming with me, OK?

Yeah? What about Ben? Your brother. Remember?

What about Ben? He's made his choices, all right?

What is that supposed to mean?

Ben's a Mitchell, OK? He's not part of this family. He's...

We're leaving. He's staying. OK?

And that's all there is to it.

Look, I know this all happened a bit quick but...

And I know I've been... I haven't been myself lately.

I've been getting really stressed. And that needs to stop.

And Friday, it will. OK? You'll understand.

I've got my Business Studies exam.

Well, it was supposed to be breakfast in bed

but seeing as you're up, you've got eggs, bacon, toast...

Who stole my beans?! >

-Which one of you tea-leaves...?

-All right, look. It wasn't her. It was me.

How was I supposed to know they was your beans?

You label your beans?

-I label all my foodstuffs.

-Why?

Because when I was in the....

To stop scavengers like you nicking 'em.

-That's mine!

-Not according to the tin.

OK, the beans are yours. The rest's ours, yeah?

-You happy now?

-Yeah.

You're not going to let him get away with that, are you?

-He said what?

-That you made your own choices. That you're a Mitchell.

I don't know. He was acting really weird.

Ian's never really played with a full deck, has he?

No, I mean manic. Bringing the wedding forward,

-selling the house.

-What? Why?

He said we're moving away.

Said he's got no friends or family left here.

I've never seen him like this. Mandy's wound him up so tight,

he's all over the place, arranging the wedding.

-You've got to do something. Talk some sense into him.

-Me?

Yeah, you're his brother! In fact, you're his best man, aren't you?

Yeah, well, I don't think so. I dunno. Not any more, anyway.

Why not? What is going on between you two?

You said it yourself.

Mandy's got him not knowing whether he's coming or going.

But I'll have a word with him.

-Let him know what a big mistake he's making.

-Thank you.

What are you going to do?

Whatever it takes.

People find out that Ian's leaving, they'll start asking questions.

We can't have people asking questions, can we?

It's just a missed payment. Alfie'll sort it.

It's not just that though.

We've missed a few bills.

He didn't even have enough money for the weekly shop.

Will there be some money coming through from my investment?

No, no. That's a long term thing, Jean. You need to...

That's a 'big picture' type deal, know what I mean?

I don't care about big pictures, I just want to help.

He's just missed a few bills. It's not the Greek national debt.

Slight overreaction. Why don't you just chuck in for the weekly shop?

Well, I would but all my money's in the investment.

Well, just have to get another job then.

-Tide us over temporarily.

-That's a good idea.

And now there's a for sale sign out front.

Wonder what he's planning to do with the caff.

I should probably call Jane.

It's him, isn't it?

-Who is who?

-The man you're mooning over.

-I'm not mooning over anyone.

-Yeah, right.

So, what do you say to a nice night in?

What, as opposed to a murder scene?

Oh, how many times can I say I'm sorry?

I've got Sasha tonight.

I was thinking about the three of us. We could watch a couple of DVDs.

What, like a snuff movie, yeah?

That depends. Do they find Nemo in a shallow grave?

Oh, come on, Ray. I'm trying here.

You'll have to try harder than DVDs on a school night.

Do you reckon a guy and girl can ever be just friends?

-Hello, Sally, meet Harry.

-I'm being serious.

Yes, guys can be friends with girls. It's just really hard.

Especially if one person isn't trying as much as the other.

I'm trying.

I saw you this morning, in your nightie.

Oh, come on, Rox. It's not fair.

Not to you and not to him. Someone's going to get hurt.

Wait, he put his name on a can of beans?!

Not even just his beans. The weirdo labels everything. I checked.

Please tell me my brother defended your honour?

My honour? He didn't even defend the beans!

What was I supposed to do? Look, it was the bloke's beans. He's got a point.

Tyler's labelling his food as well.

SHE CLUCKS LIKE A CHICKEN

I'm not a chicken, all right. I'm just waiting for the right time.

Lay a few ground rules, set him straight.

Well, listen, I'm not having him taking over that house.

He'll be labelling that TV next.

SHE CONTINUES CLUCKING

I'm sorry, I'm sorry.

12.30, Town Hall. That's it.

Brilliant. I'll see you then. Bye.

That's the photographer booked!

You're not still worried about Lucy, are you?

-Maybe she's got a point.

-What, about Billy Idol?

-No.

About the wedding and moving.

I mean, Ian, it's all happening so fast.

Are you running away?

What if I am, OK?

It's a big wide world out there and...

..maybe I've outgrown this place.

All the people I cared about, they're long gone.

There's nothing left for me here. Nothing but ghosts.

So, yeah, if I am running away...

..perhaps we're running away to a better place.

Once we're married, OK, everything will be fine.

Ian, I haven't even got a dress.

Tell you what, how about you take yourself into town,

go get yourself the sort of dress you've always dreamed of?

Might come to a little bit more than that, hun.

Yeah, it will, won't it? OK, tell you what, take this one.

You can remember the PIN, can't you? Usual one.

OK.

-See you.

-Bye.

# It's a nice day for a white wedding... #

You forgot something, love?

(ALFIE) Yeah, I know. What colour is it?

No, no, no. That's not what I said.

You're not listening, that's not what I...

I'm not being useless, all right?

I just want to make a decision with you.

HE SIGHS

No, I know I'm not there.

But at the same time, you're not here, are you?

No, I'm not saying it's your fault. It's no-one's fault.

It's just a fact, that's all. Kat?

Kat? Kat?

Sorry.

Mo said you were here. I didn't mean to...

You know what, it's a bad time, I'll go.

Oi! You all right?

Yeah. I'm good. Never been better.

Ian, calm down, will you? I just want to talk to you.

Give me a call or send me a text or something.

-Just stay away from me.

-I was asked to come by Lucy.

-What?!

She thinks you're acting weird, like you've got something to hide.

I do. We all do, don't we?

-Which is why it's important to act normal.

-Normal?

That's a laugh. What is normal about this?

Not pulling the plug on your life, on Lucy's. What are you thinking?

I was thinking about getting her as far away from here as possible.

I'd have thought that's what you wanted.

Oh, no. You...

You want me here so you can keep me under control, don't you?

Well, someone's got to, ain't they? Eh? Go back to your job.

Earn money. Take care of your family. And act normal.

Now, we had a deal, remember?

We don't want anyone asking any questions.

Cos you're in this as deep as anyone else.

Oh. £1,000. Cash. Interest compounded daily.

What was it you said on Saturday? Short term bridging loan?

A creditor might be a little bit nervous to see this.

Janine, you'll get your money, one way or another.

OK, well, I like the sound of "another."

Duvet covers.

-What?

-Exactly. That's what me and Kat were arguing about.

Can you believe it? Duvet covers for Tommy. Ben 10 or In The Night Garden.

These are very important decisions, Alfie.

Tell me about it. You know, big decision to make.

THEY LAUGH

Not sure Kat sees it like that though.

You miss her, don't you?

You should go to them.

What, just pack up and go? I've got responsibilities.

At least that's what I keep telling myself.

Funny, you know, at times like this, the Slaters pull together as a family.

I'll never be a Slater. Not really.

But, you know, I do understand it.

It's just that, you know, at times like this,

I get lonely, miss my family, you know?

Yeah, I know.

PHONE RINGS

It's only Ian. I'll talk to him later.

SHE CLEARS THROAT

So what did you want?

I'm going to move out.

-What?

-I know you said it's OK, I know you said it's OK but...

It's getting awkward with Mo and Jean and everything.

No, you don't have to do that, darling. Not on their account.

-All right, Alfie?

-Hey, you all right? All right, girls?

-Hiya.

Right. I should go.

Hey, listen. No, Rox.

How about tonight me and you go and get something to eat?

Maybe I dunno, grab a curry or something. Be lonely together, eh?

-Yeah, I'd really like that.

-Yeah, me too.

-Catch you later then, yeah?

-Bye.

-See you later. Take care.

All right, Mush? Where's Tyler?

Gone to see a man about a label.

What I'm trying to say is that maybe for the good of the house,

we should all just try and muck in together. Yeah?

I mean, this whole labelling thing, it's a bit weird, innit?

Tell me, Tyler, are you aware of the term Top Dog?

-No.

-Then let me enlighten you.

It's a prison term. It's how the hierarchy is set.

Who sleeps where. Who does what to whom. That sort of thing.

Now, it's called Top Dog because that's how it works in nature,

amongst wolves and such. It's very important to have structure.

To know who's boss. Otherwise, it's just chaos.

It's nothing personal, but it's how the pack leader, that's me,

keeps the bitch, that's you, in check.

Now I choose to mark my hierarchy by labelling my foodstuffs.

But there are other ways I can mark my territory.

We'll keep the labels, eh?

Yeah. Let's keep the labels, mate.

You looking for work? Only Janine could do with another cleaner.

Janine?

Yeah. At Butcher's Joints. I'm Executive Director of Operations.

I don't think so, Billy. Me and that woman hardly get on.

Yeah, you and most people round here.

We've all had run-ins with her, including myself.

But Michael, he'll put in a good word for you. Won't you, Michael?

I've got plenty of options.

Yeah, Alfie? Listen, do me a favour.

Give us a call about the wedding as soon as possible. Bye.

I know you and her have got history.

But I also know how hard it is out there at the moment.

I'd be your line manager, Jean. Just let me do all the talking

and hopefully you won't deal with her at all.

Come on, Jean. I'm desperate here.

Let me guess, having put the wedding off, Dad decided to soften the blow?

Put the wedding off? I've just bought the dress!

By the way, your dad wants us to meet him tonight in the caff.

Some sort of family summit.

DOOR SLAMS

I don't get it. What does he mean by marking his territory?

Don't dwell on it, bruv.

What can we do? I don't want to go back there in his "territory". I won't do it.

We'll make our own territory.

You're leaving? Why?

Why do you think? Mandy.

I hate her.

I hate her hair. I hate her nose.

I hate her lopsided, cutesy, little smile.

-I just want to scratch her eyes out.

-Hey, whoa!

I mean, I don't get it.

I know you don't want to leave. cos that's rubbish, innit?

Why does Mandy get to you so much?

Do you think she's trying to take your mum's place or something?

Are you kidding? No-one can replace my mum.

My dad's tried hard enough.

Not even my mum could replace my mum. He just doesn't love her. OK?

-He can't.

-Why?

Cos I'm not going to let him.

Karaoke? >

-Yuck.

-Wendy houses?

-She's 13, not three.

-You're not helping.

Look, I don't want to do anything. And I can't. I've got to practise.

-What for?

-Dance recital.

-You like dancing?

-I love it.

-She's really good at it.

-Why didn't you say so?

Listen, you're looking at the former Under-17s National Bogling champion.

Hey, you want to nail that dance recital, you are in the right place.

Put some music on, Mr DJ. Let's get this party started!

Yeah!

You're going to do it, then?

Yep. I've got an interview with Billy tomorrow.

You despise Janine, with good reason.

I went to the Job Centre today. It was full.

Young people.

Old people.

Mums. Dads.

Sick. Healthy.

Disabled.

And the girl behind the counter, she was doing her best

but you could see in her eyes that...

You don't have to respect your employer.

-But you have to respect yourself.

-Hm.

Anyway, when my investment comes through it will give me

the greatest of joys to tell Janine where she can shove her job.

You look nice, babe.

Thank you. Do you think I should maybe dress down a bit?

Depends on what you're trying to achieve.

Rox, he doesn't love you, all right? He's told you that.

What he's told me and what he means are two very different things.

OK? I offered to move out and he asked me to stay.

There's something there, Christian, I know it.

-Ooh!

-All right, Jean?

-Don't you look nice?

-Alfie, I've...

-No. Me first.

Jean, I want to apologise for the way I spoke to you this morning.

It was bang out of order. I've just...

Just got a lot on my mind at the moment, you know.

I know. That's why I'm getting another job

to help with the housekeeping.

-No, no, sweetheart. You don't have to do that.

-Yes, I do.

You know, Jean, you have got one big heart, you have.

-So do you.

-See you later.

Alfie?

Kat misses you terribly, you know.

I know you think us Slaters are a tight bunch

but she's there for them. What she needs is you.

Are you ready to order?

I think I'm going to leave it another five minutes.

CARTOON PLAYS

'..3% in the last 13 weeks. Total sales increased 5%.

'Retail like-for-like sales at its North American unit...

It's interesting, Gillian, talking about retailers expanding abroad...'

You'll never guess who I had a visit from. Uncle Phil!

There's a surprise.

I went to see Ben. I was upset and Phil offered to help.

Both me and Phil, right, when we talked about it this morning,

want what's best for our families.

Selling the house, our family home, is that what's best?

Leaving your businesses and dragging your kids away from their friends

-is what's best?

-Lucy, just calm down.

After everything we've been through, after what you've built here,

you're just going to throw it away to marry her?

You don't love her. He doesn't love you.

And how do you know that?

Because she's not Mum!

-What's this got to do with your mum?

-It's always got to do with Mum.

Even that girl you were blabbering on about...

Sally?

Sally Bateman. She looked like Mum. No surprise.

Everyone you've ever loved kind of looked like Mum.

She's the closest of the lot.

I do not look like Cindy Beale.

No, you're right. You're just a pale imitation.

-Lucy, that's enough, all right?

-It's not your fault, Mandy.

No-one will ever measure up. But you don't want to, do you?

-You're waiting for the right moment to run away.

-Oh, shut up!

You'll bleed Dad dry until there's nothing left then move on to the next.

The pathetic thing is you pretend that you can change.

-At least my mum was honest.

-You know what...

-Stay there.

-No.

-Stay there. Bobby, wait by the door, please.

Now.

Come here. I know what you're playing at.

I'm trying to help you. I'm trying to help us.

You know what, you are so like your mum sometimes, it scares me.

In a good way?

Your mum was a lying, cheating, murderous slapper

who would do whatever it took to get her own way.

Is that "in a good way"?

Now, you take Bobby home

and don't you ever pull a stunt like that again.

Mo, you seen Alfie?

-Not since he left.

-Left?

He's gone to see Kat and Tommy, and about time too.

Ah, that reminds me.

He left you this.

OK, Sasha! Dance recital take one!

MUSIC: "Poker Face" by Lady Gaga

Good, ain't she?

She's...original.

TUMBLING AND CRASHING

It's OK. I'm not hurt!

What you doing awake, young lady, huh?

What is it, love?

Do you know, I can only remember being truly happy once as a child.

One memory. Isn't that pathetic?

Depends on the memory.

It was Easter. She made pancakes with syrup.

And we ate the lot. We were laughing and throwing stuff at each other.

Thing is, like... Why that time?

You know, why only that time?

When we're married, it'll be pancake and syrup every day.

Promise?

I have to. It's all I have.

And no-one can take it away from me, not now.

Cheers.

Hi. This is Mandy Salter.

My fiance, Ian Beale, made a booking with you.

I'm sorry, there's been a mix-up and we have to cancel the Registry Office for Friday.

Feel free to offer it to someone else. Thank you.

Whatever it takes.

Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd