15/01/2016 EastEnders

STATION ANNOUNCEMENT

CAR HORNS BEEP

TRAIN RUMBLES PAST

HE SIGHS

Most important meal of the day.

Lou?

Louise?

Come on, Beth.

What are you looking at?

-Stinking old alkie.

-Come on, Beth!

-Beth, come on!

Who brought this in, do you know?

No, sorry.

What's this I've been hearing about Phil?

Who?

Sorry, you're going to have to remind me.

Don't play games with me, Ben!

That accident, you know, the one with Dennis.

Turns out Dad was driving.

You knew, didn't you?

I don't believe this.

I found out recently.

How?

Phil was drunk, it just came out.

-And?

-And what?

What happened, Shirley?!

Cos I'm starting to join up a few dots here.

I told him to tell Sharon.

Nah, you sniffed your chance, didn't you?

-Nah.

-Wreck things for them?

It wasn't like that.

Payback for all he's done to you?

It was killing him to keep it inside.

I mean it, he was in a right state.

Probably won't make much difference now, I suppose.

-Meaning what?

-Well, now he's opened his big, stupid gob,

it's probably got him killed anyway.

Not you as well!

Have you had any news yet?

He's finally done it, all right? I've finally got the message.

As far as he's concerned, I'm history.

As far as I'm concerned, so is he.

Sal? It's me, Phil.

I need something. An address.

And...and don't tell me you ain't got it,

because I know what you and Mum are like, yeah?

I need to find Lou.

Louise.

There's... There's just something I've gotta sort out.

What are you talking about?

Hold, hold up, hold up. Say that again.

Say it again.

Right, Sal. I'm coming over.

ENGINE STARTS

KNOCK AT DOOR

Having a clear-out?

Moving out.

What?

And while I'm at it...

you can take this back too.

What is all this?

This is simple.

I'm getting all the dead wood out of my life.

All the losers, all the people who just get in the way.

Ring any bells?

So what's happened? You and Phil had a barney?

No.

Having a barney is him

not putting the toilet seat down or eating pizza in bed.

So what's he done?

-Denny.

-Well, he's all right, isn't he?

The accident. Phil was driving.

But, I thought...

Ian and Phil cooked it all up between them.

Anyway, none of it matters, not now.

It don't matter?

It ain't why, it's what, that's what's important,

as in what happens next.

So, as you can see...

So where are you going?

Didn't you hear me? You, Phil, it's bye-bye time.

Now, sling your hook because I am sick of liars.

I ain't a liar.

I told you straight how it was with me and Den.

I didn't sugar-coat it, nothing.

I told you the truth about everything,

even when I knew you might hate me for it.

Call me any name you want, I probably deserve most of them.

But I'm no liar.

DOORBELL RINGS

URGENT KNOCKING

DOOR IS KICKED IN

For the door.

Cheers, by the way. Ta for telling me.

Has Sal already been on the blower? Has she? Hmm?

Stirring in the poison?

Is that why I'm getting this silent treatment? Hmm?

Just talk to me, will you?

Cos I ain't in the mood for this,

not now.

What is all this, eh?

You've been back a week and no-one's heard anything from you.

I told Sal on the phone, I just want Louise's address.

That's all. I just want to talk to her.

Five minutes, that's... that's all it's going to take.

Got that rainy-day money...

me and Grant set aside.

Ain't like he's going to need it now, is it?

Don't rain much in the Algarve, from what I remember.

So...I'm going to give it to my daughter. Set her up.

Give her a head start.

And I know... I know you're still in touch with her.

More than you are with me these days, but still...

Hello?! Are you listening to me? Hello!

Always did have me down as a loser, didn't you?

Not like Grant, Grant the golden boy, Grant could never do any wrong.

He done plenty wrong when you weren't looking, though.

Yeah. He was like Dad.

A man's man.

Never stood by you though, did he? When you was ill.

No, he was off, left me to pick up the pieces.

But you know the worst bit, Mum? The worst bit...

was you hated me for that, didn't you?

You despised me for that.

Because, in your eyes, everything I did for you, that just made me weak.

Sharon, she...

I was...

I was going to come and see you anyway, was gonna call you.

Not about this, about something else.

I've, erm... I've had some news.

And I need a drink.

Boy, do I need a drink.

Where do you keep it, Mum? Where did you hide the booze?

It's here somewhere, cos Sal likes a little drop, don't she? Eh?

Not in there.

Where is it, Mum? Where do you keep it?

Is it in here?

No. In here?

Nope. Is it in the fridge?

Eurgh! Food.

Is it in here?

Eh?

Is this some sort of joke? Is that it?

Eh?

So where are you going?

I'll be OK.

Wasn't what I asked.

Scary stuff, starting somewhere else.

All by yourself.

I won't be by myself, I'll have Denny.

Bit of help, support could still come in handy.

Are you saying what I think you're saying?

Why not?

Kick out one crook, move in with another?

Don't move in with a liar, though.

As for the crook bit, if you want to find a choirboy

in this day and age, good luck.

I don't want to find anyone.

You say that now.

And I'll be saying it for a long time to come.

You know the way out.

"Apple didn't fall far from the tree," that's what Sharon said.

I used to go to bed early, when I was a kid, so that I'd be one day

older quicker. Then I'd be closer to doing what I really wanted to do,

and that was to stand up to him, to hit him back when he hit you.

But is that it? Is that what you think, too?

That deep down, me and Dad ain't that different either?

And is that why you've always taken Grant's side?

Cos he ain't like Dad, but I am?

You know, I've never laid a finger on Sharon.

But I could see it in her eyes.

There's other ways of hurting people, that's what...

that's what she was thinking. The old man,

he just used his fists and let them do the talking, but I...

..I found other ways.

I know that's the same thing... in the end.

I thought I'd go on the bender of all benders after he died.

Celebrate for a week after the funeral.

But...I didn't.

Just cried my eyes out all the way through the service.

Cried and cried my little eyes out. Do you remember?

I spent years wishing he weren't around, and then when he weren't...

The reason I was going to call you...

What I wanted to say was...

Just give me Louise's address, will you?

A telephone number, anything.

I know you've got it in that little black book of yours,

just give it to me and I'll be out of here, I'll be gone.

Gone for good, if you want.

Then... Then you'll be part of a really big club right now.

Glad you ain't gone all hi-tech on me.

If you'd have stuck this lot in a tablet, it'd be hands-up time.

I just...

I just want to do something right for once.

Make it count.

If it did or not, well, that'd be up to her.

But at least I would have tried.

She's the only one, Mum.

She's the only one left, the only one who ain't screwed up.

The only one who ain't walked out on me.

The rest of them, it's too late.

Kathy, Sharon, even Ben, it's too late,

but Lou, it's different for Lou.

She's just starting out. She ain't got any baggage.

She might not even remember who I am.

That... That is what this is all about. I swear.

The cancer's back.

I'm dying.

# Thank you for the days

# Those endless days Those sacred days you gave me

# I'm thinking of the days

# I won't forget a single day, believe me

# I bless the light

# I bless the light that lights on you, believe me

# And though you're gone

# You're with me every single day, believe me... #

Why... Why didn't you tell me?

Hmm?

How long?

Mum?

Mum, just open the door. Please?

TURNS TV VOLUME UP

TV BLARES

I'm dying too.

Why does he do it, Mum?

Why does he screw up all the time?

It's like he's got some self-destruct button

or something and he just can't stop pressing it.

It's cos he's scared, Ben.

Phil Mitchell?

Yeah. Always has been, ever since I've known him.

Don't think so!

Scared of what?

I used to sit in the pub with him sometimes and, you know,

all the blokes, they'd be sounding off, you know,

the usual bloke stuff, and he would try to join in,

but you could just tell, you know, his heart wasn't in it.

Oh, he played the thug,

and...yeah, sometimes he could be that an' all...

..but, you know, he ain't one, Ben. Not really.

That's why I fell for him, I suppose.

I mean, we had our moments, I know,

but there was always more to him than the other blokes,

and definitely more to him than that brother of his.

And, yeah, I know that he is your uncle,

but Grant, he ain't just a thug, he is a psycho.

So why does he do it, then?

Eh? Why does he pretend to be someone he ain't?

You did. For years.

Because of your dad.

And he did it because of his dad.

I mean, I never knew Eric.

I mean, I heard enough about him though.

And you did not show weakness around him, ever,

because if you did, you'd soon regret it.

That ain't weakness, though.

Yes, but your dad grew up thinking it was.

I don't want to do it.

I don't want to keep thinking about him,

I want to say goodbye and mean it.

I wanted to say goodbye to you too.

Still here, though, ain't I?

Makes me weak too, doesn't it?

No, darling. It makes you your dad's son.

And that's a good thing, is it?

Gavin could say goodbye to anyone.

Just like that, not a second thought.

Who would you prefer?

I thought I told you to go.

Actually, you didn't. Not in so many words.

Well, I am now.

I just wanted you to know I'm here for you.

And where, exactly, is "here"? What, exactly, are you offering?

Cos last I heard, about three different police

forces in as many countries were looking for you.

Still leaves a lot of countries that aren't.

Life on the run, always looking over your shoulder,

you make it sound so tempting.

There are worse ways of living.

Sounds like you've just found that out.

There's better, too.

And if you find it, no-one'd be happier. If you don't...

Why are you saying all this?

Cos I mean it.

So what's happened to honest Gavin?

Telling it straight, like it is.

Sounds like you've had a personality transplant

and been turned into a Walton.

I didn't want a family when you came along, that's true.

I did when Kathy turned up with Ben, but I messed that up.

Me and Denny, we're what, last chance saloon?

Yeah.

I've made a lot of mistakes. There's no point pretending I haven't.

So would I like one last chance to put something right, at least?

Yeah, I would.

Still sounds like out the frying pan and into the fire.

And in case you'd forgotten, Phil would not even be in this state

if you hadn't done what you did to him.

This was always going to happen, as far as he was concerned.

Phil's like the rest of his family. I knew them, don't forget.

You didn't.

Eric, Peggy. Time bombs waiting to go off, all of them,

and once they did, God help anyone who got caught up in it.

Look at all this.

I've got the chance of a villa.

Steady job too, nothing iffy for once.

I'd love you and Dennis there with me, even if

it's just to take stock, lick your wounds for a while.

I missed out on everything, Sharon. My fault totally, I know.

Kids, stepkids, I blew it all.

And the minute I heard about that accident, I thought,

that's it, now a grandkid's going to be taken away from me too.

And it killed me, and I'm being honest here, it really did.

Couldn't get to that hospital quick enough.

Maybe I'm getting soft.

Or maybe I'm learning a few things at last.

He's your son, Sharon, but he's my grandson.

And the thought of that blows me away.

The offer's there, if you want it.

And so am I.

Your call.

Lou...it's me.

Dad? What are you...?

How are you?

What?

How are you keeping?

I don't believe this.

I ain't seen you for years, then you turn up

out of the blue to ask about my health?

What's the matter with you anyway? You look like a tramp.

Been sleeping in the car.

Why?

Don't matter.

Can we go outside?

I've got to go to detention.

Teacher'll come looking for me if I'm late.

SHE MOUTHS

Dad, this is so embarrassing.

When did you get so stubborn?

Since people I ain't seen for years turn up and tell me

to come outside with them.

I'm not people, Lou, I'm your dad. OK?

Me and Sharon...

Who?

Is she the new ex, yeah? Chucked you out, has she?

What makes you say that?

You look like death warmed up. You've been sleeping in your car.

I ain't a complete dumbo.

Well, I thought she was the one, you know?

No-one... No-one's even come close.

I'll tell Mum, she'll be well pleased(!)

Anyway, all that's gone now.

I'm going away.

But I just want to give you this.

State of you, I hope this ain't your dirty washing.

It's, erm, it's for you.

To set you up, you know.

With that sort of cash, you can go to college, start a business,

go travelling. Anything, no strings.

Whatever you want.

BAG HITS FLOOR

Lou!

Lou... Lou!

Do you know how weird this is?

I ain't seen you since I was, what, eight?

Now you turn up and try and give me all that.

What are you trying to do, make up for them birthdays you missed?

I'm just trying to do something for you.

You're just like the rest.

-What?

-Why would I think that you'd be any different?

I'll do you a favour, shall I?

Get in the motor, keep driving, till I hit the water?

Why are you having a go at me?

Oh...Lou...

You're freaking me out.

Lou... Lou... Oh!

Dad!

Dad, Dad!

Dad?

Dad!

Dad!

Dad!