Contra Mundum Holby City

I think it's back, I found a lump.

All right, let's get you checked out.

It's a stage-one cancer,

the treatment plan will be a five week course of radiotherapy.

And what are my chances of survival?

It's hard to put numbers on these things.

Congenital diaphragmatic hernia. Almost certainly.

Survival rates? 50/50.

This is your baby too, haven't you got an opinion on the matter?

You're her mum, she's inside you. Is that it?

I just don't want you to put yourself through this on my account.

OK. You win.

WOMAN: No!

We're trying to help you here, Theresa.

What am I doing here?

A question I often ask myself.

Jac must be relieved the amnio came back all clear.

Oh, aye, she's turning cartwheels right enough. No!

Many things are optional in life, Theresa, oxygen isn't on that list.

Sorry, I know CDH is still a serious diagnosis.

50/50 chance of survival, yeah, not great.

Sorry. I'm not sleeping very well.

I could really have done with a nice quiet day.

Here. Thanks.

Where's Spence? Been delayed in surgery.

Just put her under.

I've told you, we have to wait.

If I perform a thrombectomy now, Mrs Shaw might win Wimbledon yet.

Unlikely. She's 68.

You've seen me do this before. We need a consultant present.

Spence'll be here before we finish. Come on, we can avoid amputation.

The leg's been without circulation for over five hours.

You know what, I learned to tell the time when I was three.

We need to re-vascularise now! Malick, it's not your call.

OK, we need to get a line in. Oh, do you reckon?

Ah. Good. Mayhem. This is Theresa Brooking.

Extreme chest pain and difficulty breathing.

And keeping still. OK, OK, OK, look you take this. OK.

Thanks, Jonny. Jonny?

OK, she was diagnosed with endocarditis in '94.

Her tricuspid was replaced in '97 and the mitral in 2009.

She had a bad infection after that procedure, which they've sorted.

Is on floxacillin and gentamicin.

A neighbour called an ambulance today after she collapsed.

I wish she'd never interfered.

I'd have thought it would have been nice to have such a caring neighbour.

You've never met her.

I need to take your pulse.

Don't come in here! Please.

Close the door! Please close the door!

Sorry, can you please come back later. OK. Thank you.

Back in the day coffee was just a simple choice, black or white.

Bit like men. Now it's decisions, decisions.

My usual, please. Hmm, that's a relief.

I thought maybe I'd left my invisibility cloak at home.

Sorry?

Well you clearly can't see me, the way you pushed in like that.

I was just engaging with another human being -

not enough of that these days. Sorry, it's just I'm running late.

Oh, in a hurry, are you? That explains it. Explains what?

That scarf. Those shoes.

Unfortunately I'm nil by mouth today. I am allowed water.

So let's see, still or sparkling? Skinny latte, please.

Hmmm, very wise.

Forget it.

Can we have dinner sometime? Be Facebook friends? Poke me.

Old flame?

What do you think?

OK, let's have a chest CT and an echo.

Also LFTs, Us and Es, group and save, cross-match and clotting.

Let's get this back on you.

PATIENT GASPS

Hey! Watch it.

I'm fine. I'm so sorry, darling.

Oh, do tell her I didn't mean to... She'll live.

Oh, when's it due? Her baby?

I'm not sure.

Why's she so wired? Hospitals can be scary places.

Be good to speak to a relative. Her daughter's down as next of kin.

Listen, it's none of my business...

Why do people always say that

before they come wading in with their size 12s?

Clump-clump-clump. What are you going to do?

We haven't had time to talk since the amnio.

Nurse. Thank you. It's a lot to take in.

You know you don't have much time to decide, right?

She'll talk to me when she's ready.

Maybe she wants to know what you're thinking.

What are you thinking?

I'm thinking I need to get these tests done.

The thrombectomy is simple! PHONE RINGING

Her obs... I just need to open the graft.

..Are not looking good. I'll take responsibility.

Dr March, theatre two.

You're not a consultant, so you can't take that responsibility.

Actually, I'm qualified as a consultant,

so let's break this stupid rule, all right.

And the last time you broke the rules,

that worked out well for all concerned, yes?

Mr Spence will be here in ten minutes.

She doesn't have ten minutes.

Theresa Brooking's results. And I think we should get psych in.

Why? I think she has a disorder. Maybe OCD.

Ha-ha, oh, yeah, based on?

Based on stuff like that.

Uh, Theresa, you should be in bed. The door! The door!

OK, OK. Your not supposed to be out of bed, sweetheart, OK. So...

I can manage. Jonny, yes? Yes.

My daughter's fiance, he's called John.

Um, we tried to ring her - Annie, isn't it?

They number you gave us, it's just ringing out.

Yes, she's on her travels.

Is that a wee picture of her in the locket there? Mm.

Theresa, I'm afraid your endocarditis has returned.

And it would appear the aortic valve is now affected.

I don't understand. There's an abscess.

I've done everything. All the precautions.

And on top of that, you have mitral and tricuspid valve regurgitation.

The best way forward is to perform a redo-valve replacement

of all three valves. No, no, I don't think that's wise.

Why not? They screwed it up last time. Gave me this awful disease.

You contracted a post-operative infection. Nobody gave it to you.

It'll happen again. I know it will.

You've obviously been through a lot over the years,

but, really, this surgery, it's the best option.

It's the only option. He said the best option.

Give me some good news, Jonny?

I mean, I can alter your meds, but Ms Naylor's right, in the long term...

Then do that. Change the magic pills.

Theresa, you need this operation and I think you need it today.

I'll book a theatre.

I'll be right back.

Well, that was a tad brusque, even by your very high standards.

I'll leave the hand holding to you.

In case you hadn't noticed, she doesn't like to be touched and

then there's all those tics and the whole door...

DOOR BANGS REPEATEDLY

Door closing thing. I'm going to get psych down.

Well, she'll have to make a decision soon.

If she looks at it logically, she'll see this is the only way to go.

Talking of making decisions... I need to book a theatre.

HE SIGHS

You agree?

Yeah, I agree you'd have aced a thrombectomy with your eyes closed.

Not to be advised, by the way but hey, what's done is done.

A patient loses her leg unnecessarily but we just move on?

What other choice we got? Nice.

Hey, I didn't say I was going to crack open a bottle of champagne,

but Edward was right to make you wait.

If anything had gone wrong... No chance.

..there would have been hell to pay

because you are still just a registrar. Actually...

Your official title is still registrar, right? OK.

So until you become a consultant, you don't get to call the shots.

Those are the rules. Like you always played by the rules. Ah!

CHRISSIE: I need to arrange transport for Susan Kallend.

And can you change Mr Elder's dressings please?

The smelly old wino? My speciality.

You mean the poor, homeless man with the painful burns, right?

Yes, of course, Shall I sort transport as well?

Ah, bay three, Mrs Govan.

I've changed her stoma bag, but you can call her husband and

let him know that she's ready to leave.

Nurse!

Busy? No chance of that.

But we're jam-packed. Yeah, I know, but Chrissie's going at it

like it's her last day on earth.

Oh, Sacha, I'm sorry, I didn't mean...

Well, you've got to admire her though.

If it was me, I'd be at home with my feet up.

You do surprise me.

Do you not think she's amazing though?

Of course you do. You married her.

Sacha, I am so sorry again.

You know this place would not fall apart

if you were not here for a day or two?

Yeah, right. PHONE RINGS

OK. Maybe it would. But you look tired.

Great, thanks, just what every woman wants to hear.

I meant that you could take the afternoon off.

You don't have to be here. I do, actually.

Why?

It's my first radiotherapy session today.

What? No biggie.

PHONE RINGS

Chrissie, Chrissie of course it's a biggie... AAU.

SHE SIGHS

We need to talk about the baby.

When we went to see Mr T and he told us all the things that could

happen, the different scenarios, umm, I didn't know what to think.

But now we've both had time to process it...

Jonny, let me put you out of your misery. I'm sorry?

I've booked a termination.

When?

This afternoon. 4.45.

How terribly precise of you! You booked a termination without...?

Yes, Dr Theiler. Don't ever put me on hold again.

Did you look at the scans?

Mmm-hmm.

So you're free at that time? Of course.

One moment please.

Mr Malick?

It's OK. I'll see you later.

Good work in theatre.

I passed my exams months ago. Indeed you did.

So I should be a consultant.

Well there is nothing available at present, you know that.

Is it likely there'd be anything available, you know, before my retirement date?

Perhaps you'd like me to sack one of your colleagues.

Depends, do I get to choose which one?

I'm sorry, it's just...

I am so ready. For more responsibility. To lead a team.

But are you? The best leaders are those who are capable

of taking instruction themselves. I get that.

Rules are there for a reason.

What happened in theatre this morning was...

May I remind you that you are paid to lead and teach.

In that respect,

you failed spectacularly in the very recent past.

Ah, come on, you know how grateful I am for the way you stood by me

over the Dominic Copeland case.

I backed my judgment.

Please don't let me down again.

Young Dr March has tremendous potential

and I hope she will benefit greatly from being under your wing.

MALICK: Try to get some rest, OK.

That, my young Malickite,

was a masterclass in how to deliver bad news.

Know exactly what you're going to say, make eye contact...

Try not to yawn when you tell someone you've cut off their leg.

What? You ask me, she didn't take it in, anyway.

I didn't ask you. I was just saying.

And this is how the mentoring thing works, Dr March.

Rule one - you are interested in what I'm saying, all right.

Seems everyone was wrong about you, then. Wrong?

Heard The Malick was something of a maverick.

You know, Holby's answer to Colin Farrell.

Yeah?

But it seems not. It's a shame. I was thinking, lucky girl.

And so you are... Meh!

I know this is very painful, but you've got to keep still, OK,

so we can do this.

Problem?

No. You all right with this? It's what I live for.

Great.

Sacha, I can look after myself.

That's just the point. Look, I know things are...

That we're not...living together, but you're still my wife,

and I think I should be the one to look after you.

And I know that you're there for me.

I didn't even know you were starting treatment today.

Sacha...

Let me come with you.

No, that won't be necessary. But it's your first.

It's a hospital appointment, not a baby.

Surely you're nervous? No, I'm fine.

I don't need you, or anyone else to hold my hand through this.

Anyway, you're going to be run off your feet here all day.

I been having pains on and off for six, maybe eight weeks.

Well, which is it?

Mr Malick, this is Montgomery Keates. Monty.

20 years old.

He's been suffering periodic stomach pains for six or eight weeks.

Not sure which. Experienced severe pain this morning.

Slight temperature. I had a dodgy kebab a few days ago.

So you called an ambulance because you overdid the chilli sauce?

Maybe I should go back to work.

HE MOANS IN PAIN

We can let your work know where you are.

Thanks. I'm on a placement at Cooper and Cooper.

Biggest law firm in Holby.

What are you, the tea boy?

Er...law student.

Tea boy.

Sorry about that, she's... Hot. Don't you think?

Not my type. Excuse me.

Hey, the boy's in pain.

Show a little TLC and if you can manage that, I'll let you lead.

Lead?

Unofficially. I'll be observing, of course.

Maybe you should make notes.

Don't push it.

OK, thanks for that.

Mo? That's for you.

I've been doing some digging.

According to the consultant who treated her in '97, the

endocarditis may have been caused by a historical drug addiction.

Apparently our Theresa was a bit of a wild child back in the day.

How wild?

Like full-on hippy experimental flower power child of the '60s.

Go Theresa. Mmm.

There is nothing in her file to indicate OCD.

Well, there's definitely something going on.

Listen, sorry about earlier. Y'know, clump-clump-clump.

You were right. I talked to Jac.

And?

She's booked a termination. For this afternoon.

Oh.

MACHINES BEEP LOUDLY

I can't...

OK, try and calm down Theresa.

Her BP's dropped. Oxygen below 90.

(MUFFLED) The door...

Right. We've got an impending pulmonary oedema.

I'll page Jac.

Won't be long, Chrissie. Thanks.

Sorry. Would you mind if I...

Of course, doll. Here you are, let me.

It'll be the cuts, I suppose.

Only you'd think you'd have a staff room so you wouldn't have to

mingle with us common folk on your lunch break, Nurse.

Sister Williams.

Ooh, any relation to Robbie?

No. Not much chance of letting you entertain anyone.

Chrissie Williams.

Eh, you're on, kiddo.

Ms Naylor does know what she's doing.

Um...

You're right. Impending pulmonary oedema.

You may have a bit of fluid on the lungs which is why you're finding

it a wee bit difficult to breathe.

If it develops fully, you'll be finding it more than a

"wee bit" difficult. It can lead to respiratory failure.

If we wait much longer, even a few hours,

your chances of surviving a surgical procedure will be radically reduced.

PATIENT WHIMPERS

I'm sorry. But if you'll let me, I can help you.

Um...would you like a wee bit of this?

Theresa, I know you had a bad experience last time,

but you seem a wee bit over cautious about...

I used to be scared of nothing.

Now I'm scared all day, every day, for me, for my girl.

And she's so far away. You got kids?

No.

But you want them one day?

Never let them out of your sight.

We'll be back in a minute.

Her BP's right down. And her breathing's very laboured.

I'm going to try and see if I can get someone to deep clean the theatre.

I think it might help get her in there.

You should probably consult Jac before you do that.

Not that she always consults you about stuff.

Jac and I have made a decision. And you're happy with that?

Just leave it, Mo.

MONTY: I enjoy a beer or two. I'm a student.

Part of the course work. Drugs?

Not just now, thanks.

Do you always use humour to evade difficult questions or situations?

OK, I do a bit of puff. That's all. Please don't report me.

My colleague is just trying to establish what might have

brought on your symptoms.

I'd be finished, you know, as a lawyer. Drugs on my record.

I'd like to order LFTs, Us and Es, group and save,

cross-match and clotting. Abdominal X-ray and ultrasound.

Your father's down as next of kin. I'm not going to peg it, am I?

Would you like us to tell him where you are?

He's on a big fraud case. No need to worry him.

What about your mum?

She died ten years ago.

I'm sorry to hear that.

If you would like to excuse us. Dr March.

Diagnosis?

Query appendicitis. Maybe IBS? Better order those tests then.

Sure. Quick, March.

SHE CHUCKLES WRYLY That so never gets old!

CLOCK TICKS

KNOCK ON DOOR

Press harder.

Look, we need to scan the whole abdomen, OK?

I burned myself. Accidentally, years back.

Nine or ten times? They say smoking's bad for you.

Ten "accidental" cigarette burns?

Dr March - the ultrasound.

I had a few...issues, when I was younger.

A bit more to the left.

Believe it or not, I wasn't always the incredible physical specimen

you see before you.

You were overweight? They called me Monty Dumpty at school.

Did you get treatment? For being fat? For self-harming.

I don't think this is appendicitis.

I want to order an erect chest X-Ray. Maybe that...

I didn't need treatment. I got through it.

HE GROANS

Hey, hey, hey, try to stay calm. I'm all right now. I'm sorted.

Of course you are.

Look...I'm sorry to mess you... HE MOANS

What is it?

I'd like my dad here. Please?

JAC: A deep-clean of the whole theatre?

Yeah. If it sets her mind at ease, where's the harm?

Well, the harm is it's wasting time. Time she may not have.

Jonny, your psych guy's here. Right, thanks.

And where's the patient?

One of the nurses took her to the bathroom -

she didn't want to use the bedpan.

Oh, Elliot's at a conference. And?

It's just I thought you needed to leave early?

I might have known you'd tell your side-kick.

So much for your nice quiet day. I'm fine.

Why don't you speak to Jac again? I'm going to go and get Theresa.

Mr T.

Two, three, four, five...

Two, three, four, five...

Don't touch me! OK.

That doctor - the pregnant one - she just wants to cut me open.

She wants to make you better.

Stop talking to me like I'm five! Sorry.

That infection, last time...contaminated me.

Bacteria crawling.

They'll get inside me, and they'll spread.

I won't be able to stop it.

Look, look what you're doing to yourself.

We think you may have obsessive-compulsive disorder.

And we can help you with that. But first, your heart...

Oh, Jonny, I can't. I-I can't...

I've already arranged for them to deep clean the theatre. OK?

All of it, every square inch.

I'd seen half the world before you were born.

I'm sure.

It seemed full of endless things to do.

And my girl...

I told her, take risks like me.

I used to climb mountains, run with the bulls, jump out of planes.

She wouldn't know me now.

Would you like me to try and contact her again?

She's in India!

Anyway...we're not talking.

She's getting married out there. And I can't bring myself to go.

You're not going to the wedding?

Germs everywhere. Can you imagine what I might get out there?

SHE BREATHES UNSTEADILY

I'm going to take you to our super clean theatre, OK?

SHE WHIMPERS

SHE MURMURS ASSENT

All right, Mo. I'm just going to... Mm-hmm.

This is all so sudden. HE LAUGHS

Shh! Are we under surveillance or something?

Fool. Good to see you.

Yeah, likewise. Should you actually be in here?

I won't see anything I haven't seen before.

The gynaecologists' motto.

That is completely inappropriate. I'm so sorry.

Are you OK? Me?

You said there was something you couldn't discuss on the phone.

It's Jonny Mac.

Oh. Oh, OK. Well, if Jonny Mac's got gynae problems,

I'm way out of my depth.

Listen, has he spoken to you about the baby - since last week, I mean?

DOOR OPENS

Out!

Mo, I...I can't. Patient confidentiality. I can't.

He's not your patient. No, but Jac is.

I'm sorry, I really can't discuss this, not even with you.

I know she's booked in for a termination for today.

Did she tell you that?

Jonny did. And?

He says he's cool about it, but I don't think he is.

I don't see there is much I can do about that, really.

Talk to him! I have.

Well, just be on stand-by, please? For me?

All right. Cheers.

Monty's chest X-Ray results. What do you see?

Looks like free air under the diaphragm. Suggesting?

A gastric ulcer? Could be. Next step?

I'm suggesting an exploratory laparotomy. Should tell...

My son, Montgomery Keates. I got a call.

Mr Keates, I'm Mr Malick. Monty's doctor.

How do you do. This way please. What's wrong with him?

We're not sure yet, but he may have a gastric ulcer.

That's serious, yes?

I'm about to discuss the next step with him.

I don't know, some people will do anything for a lie in these days.

Dad.

An ulcer at his age. Unusual, yes? But not unheard of.

I asked him about diet, alcohol, all that stuff. You did fine.

Now you need to explain to him what we plan to do.

Should I talk to daddy? Get some background? About what?

Those burn scars. Maybe there's some sort of...

He told you, the self harming's in the past.

Yes. And he "got through it."

Now his job's great, his course is great, his dad's great.

Even losing his mum doesn't seem to have... Enough.

Concentrate on telling your patient he needs surgery. Sensitively.

MACHINES BEEP STEADILY

Stupid thing! Slow and gentle wins the race.

It's not a race.

Looks like we got to it just in time. Yep.

Gold star to Nurse Maconie.

You know, he's been great with her.

Getting her to open up, agree to surgery. Hmmm.

OK, take her off bypass.

RAPID BEEPING

No, wait. We've got a bleed.

I can't see it.

Here, try this.

More light, please.

Right, to the left. There. Got it?

Yep. Got it.

Well done. Well done, you.

Hey. Sometimes two heads are better than one.

Cut, please.

OK. I'm going to leave you to close up here.

I have to go.

Top man, is he, Malick?

That's what he tells us.

Hope it's not my cooking all these years that's done for you.

I'm not exactly going to win MasterChef.

Microwave chef, maybe. Yeah, yeah.

I'm so sorry, Dad.

Hey, you just focus on getting better, yeah.

But Cooper and Cooper, I know how hard you worked to get me in there.

Cooper and Cooper, established 1812?

I reckon they might still be around next summer. Yeah.

You're not worried about exams? You passed, didn't you?

Lots of people struggle their first year, right, Doctor?

I didn't. But if you love what you're doing, it'll get easier.

PHONE RINGS

Sorry.

Got to take this.

Contra mundum. Contra mundum.

Hi, Jeremy. Yeah?

Latin. It means...

Us against the world.

It's a shame you'll miss the rest of your placement.

Monty?

HE VOMITS

KNOCK ON DOOR

Mm-hmm.

Hi. Right, I've texted Jonny, and he's on his way.

Give us five minutes then come in.

What's my excuse for even being here?

You're a man, Mr T, deception's in your genes.

From the amount of blood, it looks like he's about to perforate...

On it. We need to get you into surgery.

Dr March. Come on.

I want to see my dad.

He was still on the phone last time I saw him.

That's my dad. Never stops working?

He just loves it. Yeah, and what about you?

My dad's so proud of me.

I can't let him down.

DOOR OPENS

Theresa?

It went well, but the next 24 hours will be crucial though.

Mr T. What a lovely surprise!

Boo.

SHE GIGGLES

Er...I've brought you that book. Book?

Yeah, you know, the book I told you about.

Oh, yeah. Thanks.

Oh, look. My favourite.

It's a real page turner.

Cool. I can't wait to...turn some pages. Join us.

We're having cheesecake.

Damn! What?

Forgot the cheesecake. It's all right, I'll go get some.

Any particular flavour?

Er...kiwi fruit?

Kiwi fruit...right. OK. I'll be right back.

To be honest, Mo, I really don't have much of an appetite.

Can we apply clips to the peritoneum?

Sorry, I was just checking something.

Rule number two - you are never late to my surgery.

Can I have a clip!

Is this seat taken?

SHE GROANS

Park your bum back down, you.

It's for you.

What is it?

The Goblet of Fire. What does it look like?

No, thanks.

Latte - full fat with cream and cinnamon sprinkles.

I won't tell the fat police. Promise.

Thanks.

Now wasn't that the most fun you've ever had naked with people watching?

Listen, I didn't know you were a patient.

I gathered that.

So, peace offering.

There's no need. Looks like we're all in the same boat.

Are you saying I've got cancer?!

I only came to measure up for new curtains!

THEY LAUGH

I'm Tim, by the way. I'm Chrissie.

Well, I think it's safe to assume there is no cheesecake coming.

You know, I will say this for Maureen,

whenever you tell her to mind her own business, she always hears,

keep sticking your big fat stupid nose in, every single time.

Does she?

I need to go and check on a patient.

She thought you might want to chat about the baby.

What's left to say?

She seemed to think you might not have talked things over with Jac.

Do you know where Jac's headed right now? Yes.

Right. So decision made.

So you and Mo can go on eating your imaginary cheesecake without me.

Thank you. I know how you're feeling. JONNY LAUGHS

That's ridiculous, how could I possibly know, right?

But am I wrong in thinking you two

haven't have discussed this together?

After the meeting with you, with all the "what ifs"...

I had no certainties to offer you, I'm sorry.

Yes. We did discus the risk, for Jac and the baby.

And to you? There's no risk to me.

Having this baby, if she survived, would change your whole life.

Especially if she has ongoing problems.

OK. I admit it. I was concerned about the future.

Concerned about my future.

But if Jac had wanted to keep that baby...

You keep talking about what Jac wants.

..I'd have stood by her. What do you want?

What do you want, Jonny?

I want my baby!

I want...I want my daughter to have a fighting chance.

A lot of inflammation.

Ah. There you are. Whoa. That's a beauty.

Mr Malick... We're going to need to excise it.

I think he's suffering from bulimia nervosa.

We'll have to do a distal gastrectomy. Scissors.

His teeth convinced me. We'll discuss it later.

Eroded teeth, other trauma to the inside of the mouth, swollen glands.

Rule number three - you observe, and focus on the task at hand.

But you said... Dr March, I am about to excise this ulcer.

I thought you'd want to look for... Then reattach the small bowel...

...Oesophageal tears.

..To the stomach, which will require my full concentration.

It would explain the ulcer. Out.

I'm trying to save a man's life here, and you're not helping.

Out!

You should tell her how you feel.

What, tell her I want to keep the baby when she clearly doesn't?

But how will you know what she really wants unless you ask her?

Someone help me, please. I have to deal with this.

Where is it?

Hello! Hello. Jonny, I have to find it.

Theresa, please just calm down.

Here, we took it off for the surgery.

If I don't kiss it every time I think of my Annie,

something terrible will happen to her.

Listen, when you're feeling a bit more up for it,

I've arranged for someone to come and talk to you.

Not another doctor. It's not a heart doctor.

You shouldn't have cut me open. You agreed to surgery.

You tricked me. Said I'd be safe. And I can feel it.

Feel what? Crawling around, inside me.

Theresa, please try and stay calm. Who knows what she's exposed me to.

Ms Naylor had to... Cold as ice, that one. Well, I'll sue. I'll ruin her.

Will you please just shut up!

Jac Naylor is the best doctor I've ever met.

Every day, every single day, she has to make life or death decisions.

So if she seems a little bit emotionally unattached,

then put yourself in her place.

Excuse me, could you please look after her?

There's somewhere I need to be.

I didn't realise it was such an invasion on your personal space.

Do you know, there was one nurse here, I swear she used to eat raw

garlic and Marmite sandwiches when she knew I was coming in.

Ah, gross. THEY CHUCKLE

I'd see her lurch towards me, ready to exhale,

and I'd want to put my hands up and say,

back off, I'll take my chances with the cancer thank you very much!

All that prodding... Pulling and poking?

You feel like people look at you like you're a specimen.

Like you're just a... Slab of meat!

Oh, Chrissie?

Hey, Sacha.

I'm sorry I missed the treatment. We had an emergency.

Surgery took an age.

MACHINE BEEPS

Blood pressure's dropping.

More light, please.

There's still blood. Swab, please.

There.

It's a Mallory-Weiss tear.

Yeah, well, it was either this or...

Which clinic is she at? Sorry? Come on, come on, come on.

What are you doing?

I need to be with her. Which clinic?

Jac, listen, it's Jonny.

When you get this message, just give me a call immediately, OK.

Now that's my Jonny Mac.

Oh, by the way, Theresa's talking about suing us all,

so you might want to have a wee word with her.

Which clinic? It's confidential, I'm afraid.

Come on, man.

I'm sorry, but check that out. Really good read.

HE INHALES, EXHALES SHARPLY

How did it go?

I've had more pleasant experiences. But Tim cheered me up. This is Tim.

Hi. Hi.

This is Sacha. My...er...

Husband.

Go on, you should go back to the ward.

Well. If you're sure you're OK? Yeah, I'm fine, I'm in good hands.

OK.

I'll see you later. Mm-hmm.

Nice to meet you. Enchante.

PHONE CHIMES

Miss...er...Naylor.

Jac? Jac Naylor? Nadine Wright. Small world.

How lovely to see you.

Pick up the phone. Come on, come on.

PHONE VIBRATES

So...the great Jac Naylor.

I don't go by that title officially.

We called you Jac Frost at med school.

You had a nickname too. What was it?

I don't use language like that any more.

I've kept an eye on your career. I expect you've done the same.

I remember how sour you got when I pipped you for the surgery prize.

That line not work out for you?

Oh, this is only temporary. I'm considering general practice.

What with a young family, the hours...

General practice, eh? Thrilling.

Shall we get on with this?

But should it be taking this long?

Mr Malick's a top man.

How long will Monty be out of action?

Maybe you should be less concerned about his studies

and more about his health.

I beg your pardon?

That's why you want to know about the recuperation,

whether he'll be fit for university?

You think I don't care about my son's health?

I'll let you know when he's out of theatre.

I've been dad and mum to that boy.

He was ten when she died. Ten!

He took it hard, screwed him up for a bit,

but we got through it, together. Contra mundum.

Are you saying he thinks I don't care? No. Of course not.

Then what?

Sometimes a parent can - for all the right reasons -

push a child too hard.

I haven't pushed him into anything.

Coping with his course OK, is he?

He struggles with exams, that's normal.

Mr Keates, your son is 20 and he has a stomach ulcer.

That is not normal.

Is there something you're not telling me?

I think...in fact, I'm almost certain, he has an eating disorder.

How is he?

I had to excise the ulcer - remove a small part of the intestine.

But he's doing OK. OK?

There was a complication. What?

A tear in the oesophagus. Caused by excessive vomiting?

That is one possibility.

Dr March has told me about the bulimia.

That diagnosis is not confirmed.

But the teeth, and calluses on his hands...

Mr Malick's right, we really don't know for certain.

But if he is bulimic, that would also explain the stomach ulcer, yes?

The imbalances in the gastric acid

would lead to a potential cause, yes.

Is he hurting himself again? Because of me?

There's only one person can tell us that for sure.

After I examine you, you'll take a pill.

Then you'll have to come back in a few days and...

I know the procedure.

Same old Jac. Totally on top of things. Methodical. Dispassionate.

All those qualities have done you proud.

As noted, my career is going well.

The old chestnut, career over family.

I mean, don't get me wrong, I'm happier than I ever thought I'd be.

But I really envy someone who can find such...fulfilment,

totally on their own.

You've not changed, have you?

I mean, three kids and you've even kept your figure. Sort of.

I do my best.

And you've also maintained what I remember as your legendary

lack of thoroughness. I'm sorry? I take it you haven't read my notes.

Jac. I'm so sorry.

Jac, I wish you'd just answer your phone.

Why is this so confusing? I mean the building, not the baby.

I'm not confused about the baby at all any more.

I don't know why I was finding it so hard to tell you what I want but...

Sorry.

Try not to move too much, OK.

Hey. It's OK. I didn't die.

HE LAUGHS

If you're too weak to talk at the moment then...

DOOR CLOSES

There's something I need to know.

They're saying that you've been making yourself sick.

Is this about Mum?

Mum?

I know how unhappy you were. For years afterwards.

But we got through that. We did. I'm so proud of you.

The way you've put all that behind you. Chasing your dreams.

Not MY dreams.

What?

Your dreams, Dad.

I thought I wanted it too...

I don't understand.

I've tried my best at uni. But it's just not me.

MACHINES BEEP LOUDLY

But you've always wanted to be a lawyer.

Thought...I...did...

He's tachycardic. BP's dropping. What's happening?

Must be a bleed. Theatre, now.

I hate it.

Are you joining us or what?

Sorry.

Jac Naylor, please.

She's already left.

MACHINES BEEP

So what do you think?

Trauma to the gastric vessels.

It might help if you looked where you were putting that suction.

Don't tell me you don't like the sight of blood.

Only vampires like the sight of blood.

That's not funny. Concentrate. Suction. There. Quickly.

Clamp.

OK, Got it.

BEEPING CONTINUES

BEEPING STOPS

BP's going up.

Good call with the bulimia.

It was elementary.

It was a good call, but you were wrong to tell the Monty's father

before we'd had a chance to talk to him.

Noted.

Good, you can help me close.

Seriously, if I have one more wheelchair theft by ortho, I'm going

up there with face paint and a war cry - scalps will be had.

What's eating you, Gilbert Grump?

Chrissie had her first radiotherapy session today.

Well, that's good news.

I didn't even know it was booked.

Be back in a minute. Look you can't be a mind-reader, Sacha.

I could be there for her though, couldn't I.

So, up your game. Treat her - everybody loves being spoiled.

Do you know what? You're right.

I'm going to be more positive for her sake.

That's the spirit. Do something to take her mind off it.

Something unexpected.

HE GASPS She loves surprises!

But I don't know how far I can take it.

It doesn't need to be a holiday in the Maldives or anything, but

you know the world is a fun place. You've got London, Paris, Dublin...

Maybe a night wouldn't hurt. Fine dining, violins... Wine.

Good looking waiters that you can't understand.

Sorry? Stop!

Colonnades. Fountains. Mary-Claire, you're a genius.

I know! Are you thinking what I'm thinking?

Rodolfo's! Rome!

Well, you know, you know Chrissie.

CHRISSIE: So Sacha put two and two together and came up with five.

And he thought that me and Michael were...

Michael's the hot American one, right?

Yes, keep up! Why am I boring you with all this?

Because you're totally smitten with my finely chiselled features.

Mmm. I've been there, done that. I must have been asleep at the time.

I mean, one of my exes turned out to be...

A Scouser? Oh. Gay. HE CHUCKLES

What happened to him? He went to Leeds.

Serves him right. BOTH: Men!

We think we need them.

But it's only when things get really tough...

When they called my name out earlier...

You felt like you were being called into court for sentencing?

Suddenly you start thinking of all the worst-case scenarios, hmm?

All the things you might miss if...

Now, now. Hey. None of that.

What happened to that bolshie, incredibly rude woman

I met this morning?

Listen, you don't need Sacha or Michael or

the Band of the Grenadier Guards.

You are the star of this little drama.

And one of the few good things about this crap is

you don't need an excuse to spoil yourself.

Yeah, I guess.

So now you're going to go home, run a bath,

set up some mood lighting, put your favourite music on -

nothing too soppy, mind - and think about happy days.

You reckon? Yeah.

George Michael and a couple of candles does it for me every time.

SHE GIGGLES

You're terrible.

I am, aren't I?

MO: If you could book him in for a mediastinoscopy, yeah.

Yes, it is urgent.

Kiwi fruit cheesecake! Where did you get it?

Shh! No news, then?

How's Theresa doing?

Prognosis is good.

Right, and has she agreed to see the psych team yet?

No. OK, I'll get on it.

How are you doing?

You tell me.

Well, you're going to be with us here for a wee while longer,

but the good news is, Ms Effanga says you are doing well.

So what's the bad news? Sorry?

You look like a man who forgot to do the lottery and his numbers came up.

Ah, it's been a long day.

So your Ms Naylor, if it weren't for her, I wouldn't be here?

You do know that we did what we had to do?

I was angry before. Not thinking straight.

I was extremely rude to you and I'm very sorry.

I was being a right pain in the bum.

Well...

So you're not going to sue us then?

SHE SIGHS

I've dived off a 200ft cliff and now I can't let anybody touch me.

I'm almost done.

That shrink? Psych assessment. Yes?

Think they could sort me out a new head to go with my new heart?

Maybe. You could just meet them. What have you got to lose?

Just to see my daughter again...

To see her happy on her wedding day...

You've got no idea what that would mean to me.

I'll sort that out for you.

JAC: Was it 15 minute obs or 45 minute obs?

Could you excuse me a second?

Hey.

What happened?

We needed to do a bit of a retread on your first op.

Should be fine now.

Am I going to be in here long? Probably two or three days.

And then how do you feel about a holiday?

Cool.

I thought perhaps America. My treat?

No way! Where?

All of it! I could use a decent break myself.

But I'm back at uni in a couple of weeks.

Not if you don't want to be.

Monty? I can try. Give second year a go.

You don't have to.

But I want to make you...

Proud? You do. Every day.

And if your mum were here then...

I miss her too.

I know, I know you do.

He needs some rest.

If you like me to put you in touch with someone...

About the eating disorder.

Thank you. But I think we can probably manage from here.

Contra mundum?

Contra mundum.

What are you doing here? You said we needed to talk.

I meant back at work. Are you OK?

Now you want to know if I'm OK?

I've been ringing you constantly. I came to the clinic.

Who told you which... What does it matter who told me?

What matters is - and I apologise for using this word -

I care about what you're going through.

I didn't do it.

I'm still pregnant.

Oh, dear. Why did you change your mind?

Because I know I can do this.

So you're being bloody minded?

And it's what I want.

But if it's not what you want then you're under no obligation...

Obligation?

I want this baby. I've always wanted this baby.

Right.

And I happen to think you'll make a very...

Please don't insult me by telling me a you think I'll be a great mum,

now I've decided to go ahead.

Have you listened to any of the messages I left you? No.

Unbelievable. What is the point of having voice mail service if...

Bye, Jonny.

Listen to the messages.

KNOCK ON DOOR

Come in.

Hey, you wanted to see me?

Oh, yes, I was just wondering how it went with Dr March today.

She's different, I'd say that. Different how?

I'm thinking maybe surgery isn't her passion.

Well you'll be able to enthuse her, I'm sure.

And Monty Keates? It went well in theatre?

In the end, yes. I heard there were complications.

Yes. It seems that his ulcer was caused by bulimia nervosa.

Yes, unusual. A brilliant spot.

Thank you. It was the teeth that alerted me to it.

Eroded by gastric acid from persistent...

I'm confused now because Dr March told me she made the connection.

Alerted by the patient's history of self-harm.

I mean, you know, as part of the team.

Yes, well, the team is all important.

But a good leader should give credit where credit's due.

Did she not also alert you to the possibility that self-harm

was a cause of the ulcer quite early on in the day?

She did.

But you chose not to consider the possibility?

I...backed my own judgment.

I see.

Well, in the end, that's what we all have to do.

Yes.

SACHA: Hey.

Hey.

I was beginning to think you'd gone home.

I was just chatting with Tim.

He seems nice. Yeah, he's quite something.

Listen, I was thinking, I don't know if you fancy it,

but why don't I take you out for dinner tonight?

No strings. Just, you know, take your mind off things after a long day.

Sacha... We could go Rodolfo's?

Do you know what, just going to... Or you choose.

I'm just going to head home tonight.

Well, do you know what,

that sounds like the best idea you've had all day.

I've got a hot date. Oh?

With a long bath, a box of chocolates and Michael Buble.

Ah. A Buble Bath.

That is awful!

I'm sorry. Well. That sounds like a plan.

I'm proud of you, for getting through today and...you seem OK.

Yeah, I'm fine. Thanks for being there.

Any time.

JONNY: 'What I should have said, what I want to say is...um...

'That if our little girl inherits just one tiny gram of her

'mother's fight, and spirit, and downright bloody-mindedness,

'I know that she'll have the greatest chance in life.

'Because you're her mum. Sorry I never told you that before.'

Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd