Hallelujah Holby City


Hallelujah

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-Friends?

-Yeah, without benefits.

-Don't be silly.

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Embrace the tempestuous mistress that is love.

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You clearly still like her.

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She's been through the mill a lot recently.

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I really feel a bit of space would do her good.

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I'll give you until Christmas Eve. Otherwise, it's open season.

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-I was thinking of going for a drink later.

-Really?

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Congratulations.

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You are officially this hospital's Foundation Doctor Representative.

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Yes! Yes! I won't let you down!

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Your symptoms are consistent with a morphine overdose.

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I'm trying to stop.

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-You mean I can come home with you?

-No girls, boys or booze.

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You follow these rules and we'll get along fine.

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OK. Go, go, go!

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Thank you.

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-Wow!

-Mo texted.

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-Out last night?

-Tricuspid valve referral from AAU.

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So this is a "walk of shame", is it?

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Does this look like shame?

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Don't ask. I won't lie.

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-Alex?

-Ha! You wish.

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Why would I wish? I mean, they guy's an absolute...

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You know what, as a work colleague/friend,

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you really are extraordinarily interested in my private life.

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-No.

-No?

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-I don't get it, don't see the point.

-Of?

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-Breadsticks.

-Grissini.

-Stale sticks of bread.

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Baked in Turin. Delicious, light as air.

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Perfect for dipping in an olive tapenade with Parmigianino.

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Like eating old pencils.

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Hey. Excuse me, we open the box, we finish the box.

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You said you don't like them.

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"Don't see the point" doesn't mean I won't eat them.

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Hi, Mo. Ciao, Matteo.

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Ciao, bella...

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If you want to enjoy "delicious" breadsticks you're going to

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have to lift your jaw off the floor, mi amour.

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Morning.

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SHE SCREAMS

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Whoa, sorry about that.

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SCREAMING CONTINUES

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Hello there, Evil Knieval.

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There's me thinking it was just him that was going through the mid-life crisis.

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Hey. Did I see you on the roof?

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No.

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-I so did. What were you doing?

-I was screaming.

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-For any particular reason?

-Sometimes I use scream therapy.

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Don't laugh. It's a release, it helps me focus.

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-I never had you down as a screamer.

-Oi!

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What? I meant roller-coasters and suchlike.

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-Get your mind out of the gutter, Morven.

-Yeah, right.

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-There's an inappropriate work relationship waiting to happen.

-No!

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What? You don't think he's good enough for her?

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No, it's not that. It's just that Morven's got very particular tastes.

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So did you once. Runs in the family...irresistibility.

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You confident enough to bet on it?

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# Hallelujah, Hallelujah

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# Hallelujah, Hallelujah Hallelujah... #

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Somebody's been gargling with Christmas spirit.

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# For the Lord God omnipotent reigneth! #

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So are you looking forward to the Messiah?

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-I see myself as more of a visual artist, actually.

-Since when?

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Since always. I'll show you.

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-What's this?

-Dom's artistry.

-There he is.

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He's had one too many Christmas carrots and oh, no!

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Look, he's doing a poo on the lawn.

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-Your skills are wasted as a surgeon. Wasted.

-Thanks.

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Well, once I get back from this ghastly course I should have

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a few more masterpieces to show you.

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-Yes!

-Thank you for your enthusiasm.

-I meant this.

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I have just secured two much-in-demand tickets for the ComiCraft Convention.

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I'm taking Parker this weekend.

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Oh, and his mum is in for dialysis later.

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Wow, you must really love that kid

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to spend several hours in a convention centre with

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so many undiagnosed skin conditions.

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I've really enjoyed having him around.

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And not everyone wants to spend their life in trackie bottoms

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watching box-sets and eating posh crisps.

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I do. Ah, crisps! Sounds amazing

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# Last Christmas I gave you my heart

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# But the very next day you gave it away... #

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No. No. No. You two.

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You see, you have rotted your souls with saccharine pop music.

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-Come on, the Messiah?

-A work of pious genius.

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-It's not exactly Christmassy.

-It's entirely all about...

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Anyone at all interested in doing any work? AAU are sending up...

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We're rehearsing, actually.

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That was not a rehearsal. It was a warm up.

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-The Messiah.

-By Handel.

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Suspected heart attack...

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Ah, yes. Coming to the right place.

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Some sort of sportsman, I think. Some athlete.

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Collected by paramedics from Holby Sports Arena.

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Huge hairy rugby player with tree-trunk legs?

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Collapsed in stadium during a sporting event.

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Basketball player. Seven-foot tall, long, lithe.

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Listen to them, Mr Valentine.

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Tell me, when did gender equality become so unequal?

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Well, Holby City is an equal-opportunities employer.

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I have been informed by British HR consultants that to even tell

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-a co-worker how radiantly beautiful she looks today is wrong.

-It is.

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Ah, but women can now say they would like to ogle the thighs of

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a rugby player.

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Looks like our hot athlete has arrived.

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What the hell you punks looking at?!

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Thanks for letting me know. OK, bye.

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Right. Listen up, people. I need all available nurses, OK.

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Keep that bay clear, please. We need to set up for an immediate blood transfusion.

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Has there been an incident?

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Maria, don't you worry. Bay 4 is clear.

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You don't need to talk if you don't feel up to it.

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I'm fine. Don't fuss.

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Does it really take two surgeons just to wheel my trolley?

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I'm not just a surgeon, I'm your nephew.

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-What happened?

-I fainted.

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Essie, we're going to need to do an immediate blood transfusion.

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Yeah, I'm on it.

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She's got a raised heart rate, as well.

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The transfusion should make you feel better very soon.

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Yes, I know, I know.

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You know? What do you mean, you know?

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Sacha, I think you should take a look at this.

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-What is it?

-Four transfusions in five months?!

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The neighbours will be terrified when they learn about

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my thirst for blood.

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This isn't a laughing matter.

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Sacha, everything is a laughing matter.

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We need to find the source of this bleeding.

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-I suggest that we do a capsule endoscopy.

-Yes.

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-That won't be necessary.

-I know it sounds intimidating,

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but it's a straightforward procedure.

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It means swallowing a tiny camera.

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-Yes, I know what it means. I had one last week.

-What?

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Well, I'll chase the results.

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-Why didn't you talk to me?

-Why bother you?

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It's not exactly the kind of

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photographs you frame over the mantelpiece.

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So your first day as Foundation Doctor Representative. Ready for it?

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Absolutely. I've prepared some reading materials.

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Some worst-case scenarios. Case studies. Best practice.

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If I were you, I'd save the worst-case scenarios for later.

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-Do keep the introductions low key.

-Low key. Absolutely.

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Attention, please. Can I have everybody's attention?

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Hi, I would like to welcome you all to AAU.

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The hub. The heart. The epicentre.

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Now, I know you've all left med school thinking you know everything...

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..but this is where the philosophising ends

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and the real learning begins.

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So to mark this monumental day,

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I have a very special first patient for you.

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If you'd like to follow me. Come on

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A grudge match, huh?

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AMERICAN ACCENT: Grudge ain't a big enough a word for it.

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-"Enrique the Embalmer versus..."

-"Monty the Python".

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My name should have come first!

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-So you're...

-Monty...?

-The Python?

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Don't pretend you ain't heard of me, sonny. It ain't cool.

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No...I actually haven't.

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Promoter promised me, "Monty the Python versus Enrique the Embalmer -

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"Grudge Match of the Millennium!"

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-I see.

-You are a wrestler?

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-You betcha. A killer.

-People die?

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They're not real fights, they're staged. Like play-acting.

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You watch your mouth.

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Sorry, you don't look like someone who's just had a heart attack.

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Maybe he's about to have one.

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Well, believe me, little missy, I know pain and the pain that

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gripped my chest, it was excruciating.

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"Little Missy"? So are you from Texas or somewhere?

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Somewhere, that's for certain... sure am.

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I've just seen from your notes that your real name isn't Monty...

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Oh, you think Enrique is really Enrique?

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So you want us to call you...

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Keith. You're not an American, you're from Basildon in Essex.

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ESSEX ACCENT: Well, you know, the career, the image,

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-it takes certain embellishment, like.

-And the snake?

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It's rubber. It's health and safety, isn't it?

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It seems that you have angiodysplasia.

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That's a vascular malformation of the gut and that's what's

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causing the bleeding.

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Now we know what it is, what are we going to do about it?

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Well, that's your decision.

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We could take you into theatre today and perform a bowel resection.

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That's a relatively straightforward procedure.

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But, of course, as with any surgery, it does carry risks,

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especially in the more mature patient.

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Alternatively, we could continue with regular blood transfusions

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and that will help to control the symptoms of anaemia.

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-I'll leave you two to talk it through.

-Thank you.

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Right, come on. Let's do a pros-and-cons list.

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My decision, Mr Griffin said.

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-He also said we should talk it through.

-Sacha, I know you.

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You're going to tell me that surgery is too risky.

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At your age, the chances of having a heart attack

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on the operating table are massively increased.

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There is a chance you could have a colostomy bag or a stoma,

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there's post-op infections, there's pneumonia...

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I just want you to know that there are risks attached to this surgery.

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-OK?

-Sacha, it is not your body.

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I don't want to waste the last years of my life sitting through

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endless transfusions.

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I'm here with you now. I can be with you.

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I can sit here with you. You know, we can chat.

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Don't laugh! It'll be fun.

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You know, a bit of auntie-nephew bonding time.

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Once, I rode a motorcycle 2,000 miles down Route 66.

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Now you tell me that blood transfusions will be fun?

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Sacha, please.

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Leave my decisions to me.

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Am I going mad or is that an empty bed?

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What are you doing?

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SHE CRIES OUT

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I've got abdominal pains! Nausea. Vomiting!

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-There's blood in my stool.

-Is this for real?

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You know there are actual patients we could be treating.

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This is absolutely for real, Cameron.

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You can start by telling me what tests we need to run.

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-Well, U&Es, FBCs. Obviously.

-Yes, and?

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Ultrasound scan. Possibly an abdominal X-ray.

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And what are your initial thoughts on a diagnosis?

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Morven, I am totally on board with this but I've have just

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remembered something I urgently need to follow up on.

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-Can't it wait?

-Honestly? No.

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Fine. But I want you back here as soon as possible. You're up.

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-Hey! I just thought I'd come and say hello.

-How's Parker?

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He's fine. Brilliant. Eating me out of house and home.

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What is it with boys and cereal?

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Kim, hi. So, how are you feeling?

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That depends on what you're about to tell me.

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Well, we have the results of your latest urine and blood samples

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and your creatinine clearance has increased.

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In fact, all signs indicate that your kidneys are starting to

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regain function.

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Which means we might be able to take you off the transplant list.

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That's so good. Thank you. Thank you so much.

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We're going to have to continue with the dialysis but if things

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carry on like this, then everything's looking very positive.

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Thank you! I can't wait to tell Parker.

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I can't tell you how good it will be to have him home again.

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We'll leave you in peace.

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No more queueing for the bathroom at your gaff.

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Are you going to miss him?

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-Yeah. Good kid. And Maria liked him.

-Maria?

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I did some shopping for her the other day and Parker had some

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questions about a history project.

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And it was nice, until she started to teach him poker.

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Can you believe he can dance salsa and merengue?

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-Really?

-Mmm.

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So cool. I'd love to be able to dance salsa properly.

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Are you going to zap me? Because if you're going to zap me you've got to tell me

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-when you're going to zap me.

-No, this isn't...

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I don't like electricity at all.

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-This is the opposite, Keith.

-It's OK. You can call me Monty.

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Right. Well, we're just trying to measure

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your heart's electrical output.

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-It's not the "charge to 180!" thing they do on ER?

-No, look.

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A normal heart has a certain electrical signature.

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So any abnormalities show up and show us what's going on in there.

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If there's any cholesterol blocking an artery, if a chamber has been enlarged.

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Or, if you've had a heart attack...

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And?

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What do you think?

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I think it looks fairly normal to me. Normal sinus rhythm.

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No STT changes. No evidence of infarction or ischemia.

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Surprised you've got time for that.

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Didn't think you had time to breathe on AAU.

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Please. I need the caffeine to keep me awake.

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Morven has got us diagnosing imaginary patients.

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What do you mean imaginary?

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Actually, it's worse than that. We're role playing.

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A couple of weeks ago I was diagnosing this woman that

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didn't realise she had gone blind -

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a spot that even the great Bernie Wolfe missed -

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and now here I am diagnosing Morven the Method Actor's dickey tummy.

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You leave her alone.

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Morven might be a geek, but she is my geek and I wouldn't have

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her any other way.

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Yeah, I guess there is something endearing about it.

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I've got a present for you.

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-ComiCraft Convention. It should be you taking him.

-Lucky me(!)

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It'll be worth it when you see the look on his face.

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Shall I put them in here?

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Tramadol?

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I'm not using, if that's what you think.

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I didn't say you were.

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I just couldn't throw all of them away. It makes me feel...

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..powerful, knowing that it's in there

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-and I have it in me to ignore it.

-That is a dangerous game.

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And I'm winning. I haven't even been tempted.

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Then why don't you get rid of it?

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Sorry, can I just...?

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-Yeah I know there's something going on.

-Why?

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-Sometimes you just know.

-Sixth sense?

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All I know is how I feel and I know that there's definitely

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-something going on here.

-No.

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-Nope. Uh-uh.

-Sometimes your imagination plays tricks with you.

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Yeah I'm not some hysterical schoolgirl.

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-That is sexist. And ageist.

-Cardiac enzyme results.

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-CKMB is normal.

-Myoglobin?

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Trop T normal, too. Doesn't sound like a heart attack to me.

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I think he's just a big faker.

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Nothing going on here, Mr Valentine.

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-Shall we?

-Yes.

-Bye.

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There you are.

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What? So now you want a say on my bowel movements, too?

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Sacha loves you. He's just worried.

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Right, I have made something for you.

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This is your blood transfusion survival kit.

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-What is all this?

-This is A Backpackers' Guide to North America.

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One minute you want me bed-ridden,

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the next you're sending me long distance.

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You've also got a pack of cards, obviously. Some snacks.

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Oh, my God! Don't tell me your mother is in on this!

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I spent years hiding those disgusting things in napkins

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under her dining table.

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This is to keep you warm because they're really cold - those rooms.

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Sacha, I've made my decision. I want this operation.

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I just don't think you've thought through the full extent of

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the complications, that's all.

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I'm not afraid.

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# Every valley shall be exalted. #

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Hang on. That's my solo.

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Not any more, I'm afraid.

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# Comfort ye... #

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Yes, I'm still here. I'll need to call you back.

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I need to ask you something.

0:19:190:19:21

-Me too.

-Walk this way.

0:19:210:19:22

For the love of my swollen ankles!

0:19:220:19:25

-What?

-Slow down. Do I look like a whippet?

-Sorry.

0:19:250:19:27

-So what's the skinny?

-Monty The Python.

0:19:270:19:29

-AKA Keith. Love that.

-Yeah, his ECG is absolutely normal.

0:19:290:19:32

-Cool. Move him on.

-So, the thing is...

0:19:320:19:34

Meanwhile, the old dears from Friends of Holby are giving

0:19:340:19:37

out free mince pies in Keller's staffroom.

0:19:370:19:39

Yeah, look, it's not that simple, OK...

0:19:390:19:41

I need you to get yours and get some more "for a friend".

0:19:410:19:43

-I need to do another ECG.

-Why more ECG?

-Why more pies?

0:19:430:19:46

I've been down there twice already and they're starting to give me dirty looks.

0:19:460:19:49

-Why do you want a repeat?

-It's a hunch. It's a feeling I've got.

0:19:490:19:53

-OK, I trust your hunch-o-meter. It means I get your pies, though.

-What. Wait, that's not...

0:19:530:19:57

Look at the size of these. They're Practically dolly dimensions.

0:19:570:20:00

Hey, you. School finished?

0:20:080:20:10

Only so much you can teach a child genius.

0:20:100:20:13

Check it, Essie. Modern History - A*. Boom. You and Maria.

0:20:130:20:17

We can play poker any time.

0:20:170:20:18

So this is the Holocaust project?

0:20:180:20:21

My teacher said he might enter it in for the history prize.

0:20:210:20:23

I told your grandfather's story, put in some quotes from the diary and

0:20:230:20:26

finished the whole thing with Maria and what it was like in the camps.

0:20:260:20:29

Maybe I should meet this woman,

0:20:290:20:31

get some tips on how to grow old disgracefully.

0:20:310:20:34

I think you've got the disgraceful part down, Mum.

0:20:340:20:36

-Just need to work on those cupcakes now.

-Excuse me.

-Well done.

0:20:360:20:40

I'm just going to listen to your chest.

0:20:460:20:49

Presumably there's quite a lot of

0:20:510:20:53

physical action when you're in the ring.

0:20:530:20:56

Lots of being thrown to the mat, crashing into each other.

0:20:560:20:59

It's brutal in there.

0:20:590:21:00

Yes, I'm sure, so maybe

0:21:000:21:02

what you've experienced is just some bruising, some hard knocks.

0:21:020:21:07

You think I don't know the difference between

0:21:070:21:09

a cracked rib and a heart attack?

0:21:090:21:11

Well, except you haven't had a heart attack.

0:21:110:21:13

So you wouldn't exactly know what one felt like.

0:21:130:21:15

You saying I'm lying? I'm some kind of faker?

0:21:150:21:18

No, it's just that there's

0:21:180:21:20

no medical evidence that suggests that you've had a heart attack.

0:21:200:21:22

Your ECG, your cardiac enzymes are normal.

0:21:220:21:26

I'm an entertainer. A professional.

0:21:260:21:27

None of that is in question.

0:21:270:21:29

It's just that you are a 44-year-old man.

0:21:290:21:31

-You've got a body mass index of 28.9.

-You saying I'm fat?

0:21:310:21:34

I've got a good mind to give you one of my trademark Gorilla Body Slams.

0:21:360:21:39

Yes, it's just you're not exactly in the physical condition to be

0:21:390:21:42

-doing that.

-You think...?

0:21:420:21:43

And if you are, your results being normal,

0:21:430:21:46

we should probably think about sending you home.

0:21:460:21:48

That's it. I'm out of here because you think I'm faking?

0:21:480:21:53

-Thanks, Jenner.

-Essie, wait...

0:21:560:21:59

-Hey. Everything OK?

-Yeah, good.

0:21:590:22:02

-Is your mum OK?

-Brilliant. Happiest I've seen her in months.

0:22:020:22:06

OK. So, what's up?

0:22:060:22:07

-Can I stay hanging out with you for a bit longer?

-What? No.

0:22:080:22:12

Is it because I used up all your posh shampoo?

0:22:120:22:14

It's because you belong with your mum.

0:22:140:22:15

She can't wait to get you home.

0:22:150:22:17

That's it, though. I'm not ready to be playing happy families just yet.

0:22:170:22:20

You heard her, she's going to be on, like, Mum overload.

0:22:200:22:23

I just want to chill.

0:22:230:22:25

Is all this because I've got better broadband speed?

0:22:250:22:28

Well, there is that.

0:22:280:22:30

I will kick your butt at ComiCraft any time you fancy.

0:22:300:22:33

But, I'm sorry, Parker, your home is with your mum.

0:22:350:22:38

-Rhythm is normal.

-OK, breathe in and hold.

0:22:440:22:49

I've got an aortic valve replacement in theatre 2.

0:22:490:22:51

-Dr March wants to assist.

-He has a special technique.

0:22:510:22:54

-I bet he does.

-Right anterior thoracotomy.

0:22:540:22:57

Like with so many things, Italian men develop their own unique approach.

0:22:570:23:01

-Mi Zosia es su Zosia.

-Thank you. You do know that is Spanish?

0:23:010:23:04

Are you thinking what I'm thinking?

0:23:070:23:09

-Cheese and ham paninis from Pulses?

-What? No!

0:23:090:23:11

-Toast and chocolate spread in the staffroom?

-About those two.

0:23:110:23:14

-Ah. Then no.

-It's just... Sorry, excuse us.

0:23:140:23:17

It's just it seems to me they're suddenly...very close.

0:23:170:23:21

-Bonking.

-What?

0:23:210:23:23

-Do I think they're bonking?

-No, I didn't say that.

0:23:230:23:26

-Course they are.

-What?!

0:23:260:23:28

Caught them in the on-call room,

0:23:280:23:30

going at it like lop-eared Dutch rabbits on a conjugal.

0:23:300:23:33

What...you caught them?

0:23:330:23:36

Come on, Ollie, you're such a soppy floppy fringe!

0:23:360:23:38

-Sorry, I just... I don't understand.

-I'm messing with you.

0:23:380:23:40

Oh, ha-ha!

0:23:400:23:42

-Of course they're not doing it.

-Course, yeah. You sure, right?

0:23:440:23:48

Yet.

0:23:480:23:49

Ah, just the man I was looking for.

0:23:540:23:57

-How can I help?

-Actually, I meant Isaac.

0:23:570:24:00

-Yes?

-The Winter Ball - I need a speaker.

0:24:010:24:05

-Someone dazzling, charismatic, cutting edge.

-I'd be honoured.

0:24:050:24:10

I can do dazzling.

0:24:100:24:12

Shall we take a walk?

0:24:140:24:15

I don't need to be back in theatre until we do Maria's bowel

0:24:150:24:19

resection this afternoon.

0:24:190:24:21

Yeah, it's Mr Levy.

0:24:300:24:32

About Mr Griffin's theatre slot this afternoon?

0:24:320:24:35

Yeah. He no longer needs it. Great. Cheers.

0:24:360:24:41

Still no apparent sign of ischemia.

0:24:480:24:50

Think I'd like to run an angiogram, too.

0:24:500:24:52

Angiogram? This stress echo was possibly a step too far.

0:24:520:24:55

-Belt and braces.

-That sounds incredibly English.

0:24:550:24:58

Well, he's still complaining of pains.

0:24:580:25:00

He lives in a world of melodrama.

0:25:000:25:02

I am here, you know.

0:25:020:25:04

OK. If this will cure your hunch.

0:25:050:25:08

-Groin or elbow?

-Groin.

-You're not going to zap me this time?

0:25:100:25:13

No. This is where we inject you with the dye.

0:25:130:25:15

Remember, I told you.

0:25:150:25:16

Think of the angiogram as drawing a three-dimensional map of your arteries.

0:25:160:25:19

It shows any abnormalities or constrictions with the heart.

0:25:190:25:22

Or, not. For a man who is so cautious in life,

0:25:220:25:24

you invest a lot of effort in a little hunch.

0:25:240:25:26

Who said it was a "little" hunch...

0:25:260:25:28

What's so funny...?

0:25:280:25:29

"My hunch is bigger than yours".

0:25:300:25:32

-Seems a funny thing for men to compare the size of.

-I wasn't.

-No?

0:25:330:25:37

So, nobody wants to play with you

0:25:430:25:45

now that they've realised you're unbeatable.

0:25:450:25:47

I'm waiting for Mr Griffin. Grudge match.

0:25:470:25:50

And where is Sacha?

0:25:510:25:54

Sulking somewhere. He never had much of a poker face, anyway.

0:25:540:25:59

-Not like that boy you introduced me to.

-Parker?

0:25:590:26:02

That's the one. Do you know he showed me your grandfather's diary?

0:26:020:26:08

-Did he?

-He read me some extracts.

0:26:080:26:11

He's a bit young to have qualified for the Nobel Peace Prize,

0:26:120:26:16

but he has excellent potential.

0:26:160:26:18

Especially now that he is lodging with the ultimate hustler.

0:26:180:26:22

Actually, he's going back to his mum's. It's where he belongs.

0:26:220:26:27

Nonsense. No-one owns a child.

0:26:270:26:29

I had the time of my life leading Sacha astray.

0:26:290:26:32

You clearly enjoy having this boy around.

0:26:340:26:37

Why not let him stay a little longer?

0:26:370:26:39

You were passionate about having a child. That's why you and Sacha...

0:26:410:26:46

Maria, please!

0:26:460:26:48

You know what you want, you know how to get it.

0:26:490:26:53

Up to you.

0:26:540:26:56

Are you OK?

0:27:070:27:08

No, actually.

0:27:100:27:11

One of my F1s has inputted the wrong data and now the whole

0:27:110:27:15

system's locked me out.

0:27:150:27:16

Well, make them sort it out. You mustn't mollycoddle them.

0:27:160:27:19

It would help if they showed a bit more respect for my methods.

0:27:190:27:23

Take Cameron. Where is he when I need his support?

0:27:230:27:27

Makes his excuses and then heads out for an extended coffee break.

0:27:270:27:31

I mean, one brilliant diagnosis doesn't mean that he's got

0:27:310:27:34

nothing left to learn.

0:27:340:27:36

Well, it's not just one diagnosis, is it?

0:27:360:27:38

I mean, he has been showing excellent potential.

0:27:380:27:41

Nothing like a mother's love.

0:27:440:27:45

Give him something to really get his teeth into, that'll do it.

0:27:470:27:50

Angiogram all good, I'd say.

0:28:050:28:06

I've got some deeper scans that I'm going to study later.

0:28:060:28:09

You really like to take your time, Mr Valentine.

0:28:090:28:12

Nothing wrong with taking it slow.

0:28:120:28:14

You like to rush it, do you?

0:28:140:28:16

I like to seize the moment.

0:28:160:28:18

When I grow old, I want to look back and regret the things I have done,

0:28:180:28:22

not the things I haven't done.

0:28:220:28:23

-Like this angiogram?

-Like asking Dr March to dinner.

0:28:230:28:26

Well, I don't see what that's got to do with it.

0:28:280:28:31

-You said you didn't mind.

-I said she needs space.

0:28:310:28:34

I said I would ask her out at Christmas if you two were

0:28:340:28:36

-still not back together.

-We're not getting back together.

0:28:360:28:38

So, why wait? My feelings entirely.

0:28:380:28:41

-I just think now the moment is right. And so...

-So...?

0:28:410:28:44

-Should I seize it?

-Are you asking me?

0:28:440:28:46

Of course not. You made it clear I don't need your permission.

0:28:460:28:49

But you have my permission to send this noble warrior home to

0:28:490:28:52

fight another day.

0:28:520:28:53

Mr Griffin didn't mention any further tests.

0:28:550:28:59

It pays to be thorough.

0:28:590:29:00

Is there something I should know about?

0:29:000:29:02

Yes, I thought that Maria's P-possum score should be verified.

0:29:030:29:06

Did you now?

0:29:060:29:08

Well, her echo showed that her ejection fraction is 40%,

0:29:080:29:12

which, coupled with her renal impairment

0:29:120:29:14

and breathing difficulties, means her P-possum score is also 40%.

0:29:140:29:17

-If you think you can blind me with science...

-It's a measurement that we use to

0:29:180:29:22

judge the risk of operative mortality.

0:29:220:29:24

And it's too high. It's 40%.

0:29:240:29:26

So I think we should look at non-invasive procedures.

0:29:260:29:30

We discussed the non-invasive options and Maria made her decision.

0:29:300:29:34

-Well, that was before the score was verified.

-Fine.

0:29:340:29:37

Maria, knowing now that your P-possum score is 40%,

0:29:370:29:41

-do you wish to go ahead?

-Yes.

0:29:410:29:42

-Well, it's too late because I've cancelled the theatre slot.

-Ah.

0:29:440:29:48

I know it's unorthodox, but this is crazy.

0:29:480:29:52

So I will accept whatever punishment you deem suitable.

0:29:520:29:55

Well, I suppose if your actions had interrupted the schedule,

0:29:550:30:00

then, yes, some kind of punishment would have been appropriate.

0:30:000:30:03

What do you mean?

0:30:030:30:04

Fortunately, I spotted that you had cancelled the slot.

0:30:040:30:08

What? And you didn't say anything to me?

0:30:080:30:10

No, I just went ahead and rectified your mistake.

0:30:100:30:13

For a man who's had so many wives, you are very decisive Mr Griffin.

0:30:130:30:18

I shall see you in theatre.

0:30:180:30:21

Enough, Sacha. Enough.

0:30:260:30:29

-You are going to love this!

-What?

0:30:340:30:37

So, I googled Monty The Python

0:30:370:30:40

and there's a wrestling fanzine blog about his last fight,

0:30:400:30:43

where he had his "heart attack".

0:30:430:30:44

"Monty was embarrassing.

0:30:440:30:46

"Drunk again, constantly heckling the audience."

0:30:460:30:49

"Who booed him off stage"

0:30:490:30:51

Sounds like he put on a bit of a show.

0:30:510:30:52

"And then he grabs his chest and he collapses..."

0:30:520:30:54

"And it all looked about as phoney as Santa's beard."

0:30:540:30:58

So, Dr Dunn. Do we have a diagnosis?

0:31:050:31:08

-I think we're looking at appendicitis.

-Wrong.

0:31:080:31:12

OK, well, I'm going to suggest more bloods.

0:31:120:31:14

Is that the best you've got? More bloods? I'm in crisis, Cameron.

0:31:140:31:19

I'm bleeding from the gut and you're suggesting more bloods?

0:31:190:31:22

-Wait, what?

-I'm a mother, Cameron.

0:31:220:31:24

I've got three small children at home,

0:31:240:31:26

it's nearly Christmas and my life is in danger because of your failure.

0:31:260:31:30

-This is ridiculous.

-Ah, I'm bleeding out!

0:31:300:31:32

Why would they give a job like this to someone like you?

0:31:320:31:34

-You are literally off your rocker.

-And you are literally incompetent.

0:31:340:31:38

Why should we let you anywhere near real patients?

0:31:380:31:42

I rather think the milky bars are on you.

0:31:430:31:46

-Hey.

-I've got something for you. It's a book I read.

0:31:520:31:55

"The Boy in the Striped Pyjamas". Who's he?

0:31:570:32:00

His dad works for Hitler, but his best mate's a Jewish boy.

0:32:000:32:04

What's he going to do? It's like you and your grandfather.

0:32:040:32:06

-Read it?

-OK. Thank you, Parker.

0:32:060:32:11

Catch you later.

0:32:120:32:14

Someone likes you. Sweet kid.

0:32:150:32:19

Yeah, he really is.

0:32:190:32:20

Yes? Hello?

0:32:200:32:22

Yeah I'm calling to order a repeat sodium, hormone profile,

0:32:220:32:25

lipids, thyroid profile and urine sodium for Mr Khan.

0:32:250:32:29

Yes, I'm aware you're backed up but he can stay in overnight if

0:32:300:32:33

necessary. OK, let me know.

0:32:330:32:36

What's wrong?

0:32:360:32:37

His sodium levels are too low. We can't discharge him.

0:32:370:32:40

Hi. Can I order some extra tests for Kim Whitfield, please?

0:32:460:32:51

So your patient was drunk and being heckled by a disgruntled audience.

0:32:520:32:56

-When he faked his heart attack.

-Worked a treat, really.

0:32:560:32:59

-The fight was called off...

-Paramedics rushed him away...

0:32:590:33:02

Avoided an awful lot of explaining and embarrassment.

0:33:020:33:04

I'll get him moved down to AAU, OK?

0:33:040:33:06

You might want to refer him to the alcohol abuse unit.

0:33:060:33:08

-Or Equity. Too soon? Too cruel?

-Made me laugh.

0:33:080:33:13

HE CLEARS HIS THROAT

0:33:330:33:35

Is there nowhere that you have to be?

0:33:380:33:41

You won't even notice I am here, honestly.

0:33:410:33:43

Can you keep an eye on the blood pressure?

0:33:490:33:52

Yes. Thank you, Sacha.

0:33:520:33:53

I have done one or two bowel resections before.

0:33:530:33:55

So how's it going? Everything as you'd expect?

0:33:580:34:02

Sorry.

0:34:020:34:03

BEEPING

0:34:030:34:05

BP is dropping.

0:34:050:34:07

There's a tear. We've got to find it.

0:34:080:34:10

What's happening?

0:34:130:34:15

Right I've got it. There's a bleed in the mesenteric artery.

0:34:150:34:19

Clips, please.

0:34:190:34:21

Suction.

0:34:210:34:22

2-0 vicryl.

0:34:220:34:24

Ric, sorry. Can you talk to me?

0:34:240:34:27

Can you tell me what's happening, please?

0:34:270:34:29

Heart rate 180. BP 60 systolic.

0:34:290:34:31

-She's going into arrest...

-Right, I'm coming in.

0:34:310:34:33

-Sacha.

-Sorry, I can't just leave her.

-Call security.

0:34:330:34:38

-I wasn't faking.

-Yeah? You also forgot your fake snake.

0:34:460:34:51

I wasn't. Honest.

0:34:530:34:55

You forgot to mention that you were drunk.

0:34:550:34:57

-I found a bottle of sherry.

-Or being heckled by disappointed fans.

0:34:570:35:00

My name should have come first on the fight bill.

0:35:000:35:03

Bye, Keith.

0:35:030:35:05

My name...

0:35:050:35:06

HE YELLS IN PAIN

0:35:060:35:07

You're not fooling anyone. It's fine. It's all show.

0:35:090:35:12

You're embarrassing yourself, Monty. Again.

0:35:140:35:17

Come on. Get up.

0:35:190:35:21

Show's over.

0:35:210:35:22

Get him up, get him out.

0:35:240:35:25

If you were really unconscious, you wouldn't feel this.

0:35:270:35:30

Crash team, please!

0:35:410:35:43

Mind if I join you?

0:35:510:35:52

Please.

0:35:520:35:53

Tough day?

0:35:580:35:59

Yeah. Um...

0:35:590:36:01

Peutz-Jeghers syndrome.

0:36:010:36:03

Spots on the lips.

0:36:030:36:05

It was Arthur's moment of genius.

0:36:050:36:08

Well, one of them, anyway.

0:36:090:36:11

He wasn't showing off or anything when he told me.

0:36:130:36:15

He just wanted me to learn that it's the little things

0:36:150:36:18

we have to keep an eye out for.

0:36:180:36:20

I see.

0:36:200:36:21

He was a brilliant mentor.

0:36:220:36:26

Inspirational.

0:36:260:36:27

Yes, I can imagine.

0:36:270:36:29

I'd never be the doctor I am today without him.

0:36:290:36:31

I hope you realise what a brilliant doctor you are.

0:36:310:36:34

SHE CHUCKLES DRILY

0:36:340:36:36

Shame I'm such a crappy teacher.

0:36:360:36:38

That's not true.

0:36:380:36:39

You are passionate and...

0:36:410:36:43

..committed and dedicated and driven

0:36:440:36:47

and those are inspirational qualities.

0:36:470:36:49

Maybe you just need to stop trying so hard

0:36:500:36:53

and let your talent speak for itself.

0:36:530:36:55

I just wanted to inspire people the way Arthur inspired me.

0:36:570:37:02

And you will.

0:37:020:37:03

You probably have already.

0:37:030:37:05

Not carrying on the way I have today.

0:37:050:37:07

Today's not over. And I didn't have you down as a quitter.

0:37:070:37:11

Anyway, I heard you had three children at home

0:37:110:37:13

who are desperate for their mother to get her diagnosis

0:37:130:37:16

so she'll be back in time for Christmas.

0:37:160:37:18

Oh, and I know I'm biased, but...

0:37:210:37:25

..I think you should give Cameron a chance.

0:37:270:37:30

ALARM BEEPS

0:37:370:37:38

There's no output.

0:37:380:37:39

OK, we need to shock him. Charge at 150, please.

0:37:390:37:42

-Charging.

-Good. Running up.

0:37:420:37:43

Stand clear, everyone. And...

0:37:430:37:45

Wait!

0:37:460:37:47

MONITOR BEEPS REGULARLY

0:37:490:37:50

He's back in sinus.

0:37:520:37:53

What happened?

0:37:530:37:54

That was no fake. He was in VF.

0:37:540:37:56

You were going to zap me, weren't you?

0:37:560:37:59

Busted, Monty, yes. That's exactly what I was going to do.

0:37:590:38:02

Sorry, what just happened here?

0:38:020:38:03

That definitely looked like a heart attack to me.

0:38:030:38:05

But he just came out of it again?

0:38:050:38:07

OK. Let's get him on GTN infusions and oxygen.

0:38:070:38:09

We need to look at the angio again. We've missed something.

0:38:090:38:13

I don't understand. I was all set to go home.

0:38:140:38:16

Your post-dialysis bloods are showing low sodium levels,

0:38:160:38:19

so we're just going to run a few tests.

0:38:190:38:21

A chest X-ray. Nothing serious.

0:38:210:38:23

I'll still get to go home tonight?

0:38:230:38:24

Well, we're going to have to keep you in until your sodium levels are back up.

0:38:240:38:27

-We wouldn't want to risk fitting.

-Fitting?

0:38:270:38:30

Yeah, it's never-ending, isn't it? All this medical stuff.

0:38:300:38:32

Maybe you should just take the time for yourself.

0:38:320:38:34

-But I feel fine.

-And you know, don't worry about Parker

0:38:340:38:37

because he could stay with me for a few extra nights.

0:38:370:38:39

I've got a cupboard full of cornflakes with his name on them.

0:38:390:38:42

I knew there was something wrong.

0:38:420:38:44

Here.

0:38:440:38:45

Teeny-tiny muscle bridge.

0:38:450:38:48

Very good, Sherlock Holmes. Very good.

0:38:480:38:50

It's a myocardial bridge.

0:38:500:38:51

The blood vessel's going through the heart muscle

0:38:510:38:53

rather than round the back.

0:38:530:38:55

Probably had it since before birth, formed in the womb.

0:38:550:38:57

Well, yeah, these things are normally OK

0:38:570:39:00

but with stress or exertion the heart muscle contracts,

0:39:000:39:03

the vessel's squeezed and the blood flow is restricted.

0:39:030:39:06

Heart arrests but starts again when muscles relax.

0:39:060:39:09

Just like with a wrestler when he has his opponent in a deadlock

0:39:090:39:12

and increases the pressure.

0:39:120:39:14

So, let's book a theatre and go have some drama.

0:39:140:39:17

SIREN BLARES

0:39:190:39:20

Sacha.

0:39:240:39:25

It's bad news, isn't it?

0:39:270:39:29

No, no. She's fine. She's fine.

0:39:290:39:31

Oh, thank you. Thank you.

0:39:320:39:34

Even if I did have to call security to have you ejected

0:39:340:39:37

from the viewing gallery.

0:39:370:39:39

It was lucky that you'd gone by the time they'd arrived.

0:39:390:39:42

For what it's worth, I like you better when you show some fight.

0:39:420:39:47

And I am so looking forward to hearing your solo.

0:39:470:39:50

Well, actually, Isaac is down to do it.

0:39:510:39:54

What?

0:39:540:39:55

But things could change. I do remain optimistic.

0:39:550:39:57

Maybe it's your tactics.

0:40:010:40:05

Your strategy's amateurish.

0:40:050:40:07

Childish. I mean...

0:40:080:40:10

That is without doubt a lethal weapon.

0:40:140:40:16

My mum made them. Apparently, 2012 was a vintage year for cucumbers.

0:40:160:40:22

Please don't tell me that you've eaten half the jar?

0:40:220:40:25

Well, I didn't eat them.

0:40:250:40:27

But I gave them to Isaac to put in his pastrami sandwich.

0:40:270:40:30

AIR HISSES

0:40:350:40:36

Tell me what you see.

0:40:390:40:41

The artery disappears into the muscle.

0:40:430:40:46

Myocardial bridge.

0:40:460:40:47

And so, what do we do?

0:40:470:40:49

-Bypass.

-A myotomy.

0:40:490:40:51

You want to go around and totally avoid the issue.

0:40:510:40:53

And you, you want to plunge right in.

0:40:530:40:55

A coronary artery bypass would be like using a sledgehammer to crack a nut.

0:40:550:40:59

It's the safest way.

0:40:590:41:00

It's unnecessary extended surgery.

0:41:000:41:02

We'd have to harvest a mammary artery and then use a bypass graft.

0:41:020:41:06

There is so much that could go wrong.

0:41:060:41:08

Instead you just want to plough into the muscle, wielding your knife,

0:41:080:41:11

-hoping to sever the artery.

-There's no ploughing anywhere.

0:41:110:41:14

-I'd be clearing a path in order...

-I'm pretty sure that's ploughing.

0:41:140:41:17

In order to establish a forward flow.

0:41:170:41:19

What if the myotomy leads to post-op fibrosis and the obstruction

0:41:190:41:24

reoccurs? And what if you can't locate that bridge exactly

0:41:240:41:28

and then what? You just keep on cutting?

0:41:280:41:30

OK, doctors. Your patient is on the table. His chest is open.

0:41:300:41:35

You have two opposing opinions. Who is right?

0:41:350:41:37

-BOTH:

-I am.

0:41:370:41:38

It's not serious, is it, this stuff with Mum?

0:41:450:41:47

No, no. You don't need to worry.

0:41:470:41:49

It might just mean that she stays in hospital for a few more days

0:41:490:41:52

but it's OK, isn't it?

0:41:520:41:53

Because it's what you wanted, to stay with me.

0:41:530:41:55

Yeah. Nice one.

0:41:550:41:57

As long as you don't inflict any more reality TV on me.

0:41:570:41:59

Well, we'll be at the convention most of the weekend.

0:41:590:42:02

Oh, about that. I don't know how much of it I can make.

0:42:020:42:05

-My friend Lewis is having this party...

-What?

0:42:050:42:07

But we were looking forward to it.

0:42:080:42:10

His dad works in TV locations and he's hired out this skate park.

0:42:100:42:14

Well, the tickets weren't free, you know.

0:42:140:42:16

We can auction them. Make a profit.

0:42:160:42:19

It's not about the money. You said you wanted to go.

0:42:190:42:22

It's not a big deal, is it?

0:42:220:42:23

Not something worth getting stressed out over.

0:42:230:42:26

I'm not stressing.

0:42:260:42:27

You're not mad at me for wanting to go to my best friend's party, are you?

0:42:290:42:34

No, of course not.

0:42:340:42:35

Right, I'll see you back at home, if you're in later.

0:42:370:42:40

Yeah. Nice one.

0:42:400:42:41

To bypass the problem?

0:42:460:42:48

Or cut to into the problem, hoping to find a way out?

0:42:480:42:52

Which?

0:42:520:42:53

Bypass. Definitely.

0:42:530:42:55

Belt and braces?

0:42:550:42:56

Mr Valentine, Monty has been your patient all along.

0:42:580:43:02

You had a hunch about him even when we didn't.

0:43:020:43:06

I think you should take the lead and do your bypass.

0:43:060:43:08

Hey.

0:43:160:43:18

Hey.

0:43:180:43:19

What I said before... I'm sorry.

0:43:190:43:22

It's me who should be apologising to you.

0:43:220:43:24

I should never have snapped at you like that.

0:43:240:43:26

Yeah, I shouldn't have said you were off your rocker. You're not.

0:43:260:43:30

Aren't I?

0:43:300:43:31

Maybe a little bit. But only in a good way.

0:43:330:43:36

We should probably get back in. Patients waiting.

0:43:370:43:41

You know, real ones this time.

0:43:410:43:42

Does that mean we don't get to see any more of your performance art?

0:43:420:43:45

Because I was really looking forward to your ruptured spleen.

0:43:450:43:49

SHE LAUGHS

0:43:490:43:50

Your lips.

0:43:570:43:59

What?

0:43:590:44:01

There are dots.

0:44:020:44:04

Oh, yeah, of course.

0:44:040:44:05

Yeah, sorry. Um...

0:44:050:44:07

Did you think...?

0:44:070:44:09

-No. Course not. You meant the dots, didn't you?

-Yeah.

-Dots, yeah.

0:44:090:44:12

PJS, isn't it?

0:44:120:44:13

PJS. Exactly. Very good spot!

0:44:130:44:15

SHE CHUCKLES

0:44:150:44:16

Thanks.

0:44:160:44:18

Um...

0:44:180:44:20

Maybe you won't make such a terrible doctor after all.

0:44:200:44:24

Well, I have got a fairly excellent mentor.

0:44:240:44:27

OK. Looks like this is where the muscle bridge is.

0:44:300:44:34

Can you get in?

0:44:340:44:35

Well, there's a whole nest of vessels beneath the surface,

0:44:350:44:39

crisscrossing the muscle, you see?

0:44:390:44:41

-Could you cut through it?

-Not without causing a bleed.

0:44:410:44:43

-Cut deeper.

-Well, that would risk holing the artery, wouldn't it?

0:44:430:44:47

OK. So, given the dangers,

0:44:470:44:50

what is the best way forward from this point?

0:44:500:44:52

Graft, I'd say.

0:44:520:44:53

I was asking Dr March.

0:44:530:44:55

Graft.

0:44:570:44:59

So, good call, Mr Valentine.

0:44:590:45:01

Seems you can't be too cautious, can you, Ollie?

0:45:010:45:04

Yeah, and you just press there.

0:45:050:45:07

Perfect.

0:45:080:45:10

PATIENT GASPS AND CHOKES

0:45:100:45:12

I'm on it.

0:45:120:45:13

Talk to me, Cam. What's happening?

0:45:160:45:18

Wait. OK, he's swallowed his tongue. Airway.

0:45:180:45:20

HE BREATHES HEAVILY

0:45:290:45:30

OK, he's back in the room.

0:45:300:45:32

That was pretty intense.

0:45:340:45:36

You're telling me.

0:45:360:45:37

You want to scream it out?

0:45:390:45:41

What...?

0:45:410:45:43

..are you doing?

0:45:450:45:47

Whoa!

0:45:470:45:48

I think that's 20 quid you owe me.

0:45:490:45:51

-Presumptuous.

-Well, what else do you think they're doing?

0:45:510:45:54

-I don't know but I intend to find out.

-Serena!

0:45:540:45:57

(Serena!)

0:45:570:45:59

MORVEN AND CAMERON YELL

0:45:590:46:02

You gave us quite a scare.

0:46:020:46:05

Well, I've always had a flair for the dramatic.

0:46:050:46:08

THEY CHUCKLE

0:46:080:46:10

I'm sorry. I should have trusted your decision.

0:46:100:46:13

You did it out of love. I know.

0:46:130:46:15

In fact, I'm rather flattered the way you defied the mighty Mr Griffin.

0:46:150:46:20

Please. Ric Griffin's a pussy cat.

0:46:200:46:22

SHE LAUGHS

0:46:220:46:24

It's good to see you breaking a few rules.

0:46:240:46:26

I didn't know you had it in you.

0:46:260:46:28

I wear leathers now, you know.

0:46:280:46:30

Please. The less said about that, the better.

0:46:300:46:34

You know, it's colder than I'd like in here.

0:46:370:46:41

You don't happen to have a blanket, do you?

0:46:410:46:44

# How beautiful are the feet of them that preach the gospel of peace... #

0:46:570:47:06

Hmm. Non-alcoholic eggnog and non-alcoholic mulled wine?

0:47:060:47:10

-How very spirit of Christmas!

-Hey.

0:47:100:47:13

You OK?

0:47:130:47:14

Not half as OK as your girlfriend looks.

0:47:140:47:17

She having a private Italian lesson?

0:47:170:47:19

She's not my girlfriend.

0:47:190:47:20

Mmm. Word is he speaks five languages and plays the cello.

0:47:200:47:23

And dances merengue and salsa.

0:47:230:47:27

-And she's not my girlfriend.

-Thank you.

0:47:270:47:29

I know.

0:47:290:47:30

You know we're not actually back together.

0:47:300:47:33

-I know. I heard.

-Probably never going to get back together...

0:47:330:47:35

How? How do you know?

0:47:350:47:37

Come on, Ollie, this is Holby City. We work in a microclimate.

0:47:370:47:40

We all share the same weather and the same gossip.

0:47:400:47:43

Yeah. I suppose.

0:47:430:47:45

And it looks like a lot of people that work here end up

0:47:450:47:48

sharing the same partners too.

0:47:480:47:50

You think Zosia knows that you and I are no longer...

0:47:520:47:55

-Sharing a microclimate?

-Dating.

0:47:550:47:57

You call that dating? What we were doing was just serial...

0:47:570:47:59

Do you think Zosia knows that we're done?

0:47:590:48:01

Of course.

0:48:010:48:03

Well, how? I mean, just gossip or...?

0:48:030:48:05

Yeah.

0:48:050:48:07

Oh, and because I told her.

0:48:070:48:08

What? Why would you do that?

0:48:080:48:10

Because, Oliver...

0:48:110:48:14

she asked me.

0:48:140:48:15

Essie, can I have a word?

0:48:200:48:22

Yeah?

0:48:220:48:23

I was just checking through Kim's discharge form and I noticed this.

0:48:230:48:26

Hormone profile, lipids, thyroid profile, urine sodium, chest X-ray.

0:48:260:48:31

What's going on?

0:48:310:48:33

Well, I just thought that Kim's sodium levels were looking a bit low.

0:48:330:48:38

Really? They look fine to me.

0:48:380:48:40

Yeah, I just thought...

0:48:400:48:43

INAUDIBLE SPEECH

0:48:440:48:46

Ah. I see.

0:48:500:48:52

I just...

0:48:520:48:54

No. No. I understand.

0:48:540:48:56

That's very sensible.

0:48:580:48:59

What?

0:49:010:49:02

Well, it pays to be thorough.

0:49:020:49:04

When you care about someone,

0:49:040:49:06

you need to make sure you've pursued every angle.

0:49:060:49:09

Maybe we should cancel those tests.

0:49:120:49:14

Let Kim go home.

0:49:150:49:16

You're right. Um...

0:49:220:49:24

I'll sort it out.

0:49:250:49:27

Thank you.

0:49:290:49:31

# And he shall pu-urify... #

0:49:350:49:39

Ah! How was the course?

0:49:390:49:41

Deathly.

0:49:410:49:43

Well, maybe this evening's performance will lift your spirits.

0:49:430:49:46

Voice of an angel - or so my grandma tells me.

0:49:460:49:50

Well, I look forward to it.

0:49:500:49:52

Although, you do realise it would mean a lot to Sacha

0:49:520:49:54

if you gave him back that solo.

0:49:540:49:56

Are you serious?

0:49:560:49:57

There are sick people in this hospital.

0:49:570:49:59

You want to inflict that on them?

0:49:590:50:02

Oh...

0:50:020:50:03

You OK?

0:50:030:50:04

Yes, probably just something I ate. I'll be fine.

0:50:040:50:08

THEY LAUGH

0:50:080:50:10

So, how do I scrub up?

0:50:100:50:13

You're all right.

0:50:140:50:15

Well, get dressed.

0:50:190:50:21

-'Doors opening.'

-Last time I looked in the fridge

0:50:240:50:26

I found a piece of Parmesan and a jar of something called spirulina.

0:50:260:50:30

What's that, Mum? Frogs' pee?

0:50:300:50:31

It's actually very good for the skin, but...

0:50:310:50:34

OK, maybe we do need some supplies.

0:50:340:50:36

OK, I'll be Matteo...

0:50:460:50:50

That's going to take a stretch of the imagination.

0:50:500:50:53

Oh, no, come on. I can't take you seriously

0:50:540:50:56

if you're going to be waving that little thing around.

0:50:560:50:59

That's my baton.

0:50:590:51:00

It's a bit small, isn't it?

0:51:000:51:01

THEY GIGGLE

0:51:010:51:02

Essie, help me out. What is wrong with my baton?

0:51:020:51:05

No, no. Do not answer that question.

0:51:050:51:07

Essie! Come and join us. We're missing a soprano.

0:51:070:51:09

-Oh, no, no. I don't sing.

-Excuse me?

0:51:090:51:12

New Year's Eve 2015. Alby's. It's Raining Men.

0:51:120:51:15

Well, there was tequila involved. That doesn't count.

0:51:150:51:17

-If it takes tequila, that can be arranged.

-Come on.

0:51:170:51:19

-Come on.

-We need you.

-Please. Please.

0:51:190:51:22

# King of Kings!

0:51:260:51:28

# Hallelujah, hallelujah!

0:51:280:51:29

-# And Lord of Lords

-Hallelujah, hallelujah! #

0:51:290:51:33

-BADLY OFF KEY:

-# Hallelu... #

0:51:330:51:35

ALL LAUGH

0:51:350:51:36

-Ow!

-Great!

0:51:360:51:37

He's going to be fine. Just let him rest, OK?

0:51:420:51:45

Goodnight.

0:51:460:51:48

Those are Christmas tree decorations.

0:51:520:51:54

Chocolate.

0:51:540:51:56

Supposed to hang on the Christmas tree until Christmas Day.

0:51:560:51:58

Sorry, didn't you hear what I said? Chocolate.

0:51:580:52:00

Twelfth Night, actually.

0:52:000:52:02

Christmas is practically two weeks away.

0:52:020:52:03

You really think these are going to be good to eat in two weeks?

0:52:030:52:06

Ah. Seize the moment?

0:52:060:52:07

No. Seize the chocolate. Before anybody else does.

0:52:070:52:10

-Ah.

-You want to be helpful? Peel a couple for me.

0:52:100:52:12

You know, Matteo asked me if he could ask Zosia out to dinner.

0:52:120:52:16

Mm-hmm?

0:52:160:52:17

Well, what could I say?

0:52:170:52:19

"Go anywhere near her and I'll rip your knackers off and feed 'em to the fishes!"

0:52:190:52:22

-What?

-But of course you - oh,

0:52:220:52:24

that stiff-upper-lipped, chinless, extremely English Ollie said...

0:52:240:52:27

Look, he doesn't have to ask my permission. I'm not her keeper.

0:52:270:52:30

No, of course not.

0:52:300:52:32

He'll twinkle his chestnut eyes, and be in there in a blink,

0:52:320:52:35

and then you will be Long Face Ollie for the next 300 years. Yay!

0:52:350:52:39

Peel me a reindeer, schmuck.

0:52:390:52:41

I said I wasn't going to get involved and I'm not getting involved.

0:52:420:52:44

I am just baking my beautiful baby and eating for England.

0:52:440:52:47

Good. Thank you.

0:52:470:52:49

-Do you know the worst thing about being this pregnant?

-Hmm?

0:52:510:52:54

The waiting. Waiting for something to happen.

0:52:540:52:56

I mean, something will happen.

0:52:560:52:58

It's inevitable, but nothing I say or do will make any difference.

0:52:580:53:01

-I just have to wait.

-Good. Right.

0:53:010:53:03

Goodnight.

0:53:030:53:04

It's the same with you and Zosia.

0:53:040:53:07

I mean, yes, you are right for each other

0:53:070:53:09

and yes, you should be together.

0:53:090:53:10

Watching you torture and make each other miserable is simply divine

0:53:100:53:14

but nothing I say will make any difference.

0:53:140:53:16

Exactly.

0:53:160:53:17

Exactly...

0:53:200:53:22

So I'm saying nothing. I will just eat.

0:53:220:53:24

Thank you. No...

0:53:280:53:30

Thank you. You're absolutely right.

0:53:320:53:35

HE KISSES HER

0:53:350:53:36

# O thou that tellest good tidings to Zion... #

0:53:460:53:50

OK. You, you - no.

0:53:500:53:52

-Excuse me?

-No. Just no. Non. Not happening.

0:53:520:53:55

What is not happening?

0:53:550:53:56

And you... Yes. Always yes.

0:53:560:53:58

And yes... I'm sorry.

0:53:580:54:00

And yes, Jasmine was a mistake.

0:54:000:54:01

-And no, I don't want him to be your Jasmine.

-Now I am a Jasmine?

0:54:010:54:04

And no, I don't care who you spent last night with,

0:54:040:54:06

even if it was with him or Alex or...whoever.

0:54:060:54:09

And yes...

0:54:090:54:11

I want back what we had.

0:54:110:54:12

I don't want anyone else and I don't want you to have anyone else.

0:54:120:54:15

-Especially not him.

-Thank you.

0:54:150:54:16

-No disrespect intended.

-None taken.

0:54:160:54:18

It's just that he asked me if he could ask you out.

0:54:180:54:20

-I know, I...

-And I said yes. I mean, I didn't say no. I meant no.

0:54:200:54:24

I just didn't say no.

0:54:240:54:25

Although all the time I was thinking no. NO!

0:54:250:54:28

I just...

0:54:280:54:29

I don't want to be some stiff-upper-lipped, English, beige,

0:54:290:54:32

Downton Abbey-loving Oliver.

0:54:320:54:34

I want to be more...more...

0:54:340:54:35

-Italian?

-No!

0:54:350:54:37

OK, hang on.

0:54:380:54:39

How do you know that he asked me if he could ask you out?

0:54:400:54:44

I asked him to ask you.

0:54:440:54:46

Sorry...

0:54:460:54:48

You asked Matteo to ask me if it was all right if he asks you out?

0:54:480:54:52

OK, this is my cue. Excuse me.

0:54:520:54:54

Holby is waiting for me to give my Messiah.

0:54:540:54:56

You asked him to ask me if it was all right to ask you out?

0:54:560:55:00

Yes, but Ollie...

0:55:000:55:01

-No.

-Let...

-No.

0:55:010:55:04

Let me explain. Let me explain.

0:55:040:55:07

Come on.

0:55:070:55:09

Right, I'm going to go and get changed.

0:55:140:55:16

SACHA HUMS

0:55:160:55:17

-Can you stop doing that? It's really irritating.

-I'm warming up.

0:55:170:55:19

According to Handel, God sat in heaven and shed a tear

0:55:190:55:22

at the first performance of the Messiah.

0:55:220:55:24

And now he's up there sobbing.

0:55:240:55:26

ISAAC GROANS

0:55:260:55:27

-Excuse me, sorry, sorry.

-Isaac?

0:55:270:55:29

Sorry!

0:55:290:55:30

I'm going to have to do the solo.

0:55:310:55:34

Um...

0:55:340:55:35

Well, the show must go on.

0:55:350:55:37

# Every valley

0:55:370:55:40

# Every valley... #

0:55:400:55:43

SIRENS BLARE

0:55:430:55:45

CHOIR SINGS HALLELUJAH CHORUS

0:55:450:55:46

There was no man last night.

0:55:460:55:48

SHE LAUGHS

0:55:480:55:49

No hot date. No walk of shame.

0:55:490:55:52

You staged this?

0:55:520:55:53

I got up this morning and I dressed as though I'd been out all night

0:55:530:55:56

in a bid to make you pay me some attention.

0:55:560:55:59

To kick you into action.

0:55:590:56:00

You played me?

0:56:000:56:01

To make you make a decision.

0:56:010:56:03

You faked it? You faked being with someone.

0:56:030:56:04

To make you realise what you're missing.

0:56:040:56:07

OK.

0:56:080:56:09

So all that stuff with Matteo this morning, whispering in the kitchen.

0:56:090:56:13

-I was asking him to ask you...

-Asking, yes, if it was OK.

0:56:130:56:16

Yes, and it worked.

0:56:160:56:17

You tricked me.

0:56:190:56:20

I nudged you in the right direction to make you make a decision.

0:56:200:56:24

Manipulation through fakery.

0:56:240:56:26

Yes, but it worked.

0:56:260:56:28

You yourself said that you wanted back what we had.

0:56:280:56:31

Oh, no, no, no, no, no.

0:56:310:56:33

Ollie?

0:56:330:56:34

You tricked me and now you want to go back to the way things were?

0:56:340:56:37

Yes, and you want that, too.

0:56:370:56:38

-No!

-No?

0:56:380:56:39

Definitely not!

0:56:390:56:41

Oliver...

0:56:410:56:42

Sorry. I can't go back to that. Not with a fraud.

0:56:420:56:45

I am not a fraud.

0:56:470:56:49

My feelings...

0:56:490:56:50

And I can't go back to "dating" either.

0:56:500:56:52

You are taking this the wrong way.

0:56:530:56:55

But you can move in with me.

0:56:590:57:01

HE CLEARS HIS THROAT

0:57:030:57:05

Again.

0:57:050:57:07

We'll just have to make it more, um...

0:57:070:57:09

Just more.

0:57:120:57:13

Really?

0:57:140:57:16

All or nothing.

0:57:160:57:17

I want all.

0:57:210:57:22

-CHOIR:

-# Hallelujah, hallelujah

0:57:220:57:25

# Hallelujah, hallelujah

0:57:250:57:27

# Hallelujah. #

0:57:290:57:35

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