Exit, Pursued by a Bear Shakespeare & Hathaway - Private Investigators

Be careful with those pins.

Even stars bleed.

Sorry.

I'm still in a bit of a daze.

This is my dream job.

-Just don't ask for a selfie.

-Oh, no, I'd never.

It becomes so tiresome.

KNOCK ON DOOR

Sally, what the hell is this? Didn't you learn anything from the preview? You can't rewrite Romeo and Juliet.

It's just a few more tweaks.

No-one tweaks the Bard.

Roman, we had a deal, remember? A little promise between each other.

There isn't a play in the world that couldn't do better with a few changes.

I think I'm done here.

So, how do I look? Would Romeo kill himself for me?

Oh, he'd definitely kill.

He wouldn't be able to help himself.

I need more light.

Romeo, Romeo, wherefore art thou...

What on earth?!

Oh, my!

-It would.

-It wouldn't.

It absolutely would.

A gorilla. Grr!

A gorilla is far stronger than a lion, it'd easy beat it in a fight.

-FRANK MAKES GORILLA NOISES

-Lion is a natural born killer.

Gorillas just sit about eating bananas all day.

Help me.

I'll pay anything.

Please take a seat.

Right, erm, shall we...shall we start with, er, a name? Your name.

-You don't know who I am?

-SEBASTIAN:

-Exactly!

The budgie smugglers had nothing to smuggle... Go away.

Sally Balthasar! I don't know whether to fawn or to faint.

Please say you'll help me.

Only someone's trying to kill me, and the wretched police

don't want to know.

So, who knew that you were staying here?

Well, I'm Sally Balthasar. Word will have got round.

Ward 9?

Soap opera?

Well, I prefer medical drama.

I played Senior Staff Nurse Nora Claret.

-So, nothing?

-I've checked everything.

OK. Thanks.

CCTV's down, so won't get anything out of that.

And you were in Miss Balthasar's room because...?

Sally wanted me to do an early costume fitting.

-I'd been up all night tacking and...

-You are?

Oh, I'm Roman Randall, the theatre director.

I just popped in with a few thoughts about the...

..play.

So, you're all in Stratford to put on a show?

A show? This is theatre.

Have you had threats like this before?

Well, hardly. I'm a national treasure.

I think it's probably a prank.

This isn't a prank!

This is a death threat.

OK, look, erm, I'll get CSI over first chance I get.

But we've got a lot on our plates right now.

So, tell me, who else might have read your updated version of Romeo and Juliet?

You mean Juliet and Romeo?

The cast were issued with more changes last night.

But I don't think that's it.

Oh, it's just a few lines here and there.

And is there anyone you've upset recently?

Well, there was this one chap...

..at the preview performance.

Horrendous fellow.

What's here?

A cup, closed in my true love's hand?

Poison, I see, hath been his timeless end.

And he foolishly thinks I should join him in heaven?

Slay myself for a man? Never!

I have a dream.

Not for equality.

But a dream for an apology.

A desire for every man to say sorry to every woman

for their unremitting abuse of power.

Our love has to be earned from now on, gentlemen.

You're a disgrace, Balthasar!

Do your hear that, Romeo? Do you hear me?

You're a despicable disgrace!

Do you hear that, Romeo? Too late to kill me!

You're a disgrace!

I'd only really changed the ending.

But now you've made some more changes?

Well, once you get a taste for it...

So, we could be talking about a kind of aggressive Shakespeare traditionalist here?

Which is something you don't get to say every day.

Well, I'll try and find him.

I'll go down to the hotel, see what I can dig up.

And I'll sashay my way over to the theatre.

Says who?

It's my world, Frank. I can be your eyes and ears on the ground.

I'm also an actor.

So if, say, I had to go undercover and do the odd part, I'd probably be wonderful.

-He would.

-He wouldn't.

BELL RINGS

-Good morning, madam.

-Hello.

Sorry to bother you but, erm, I was staying here last week and I think I left my...

..toothbrush in my room.

A toothbrush?

It was electric. Cost me an arm and a leg.

So, erm, I have been using a spare, obviously.

Of course.

Could you check the lost property for me?

-I'll have a look.

-Thanks.

-SEBASTIAN:

-'Tis torture, and not mercy.

Heaven is here, where Juliet lives,

and every cat and dog and little mouse, every unworthy thing,

live here in heaven and may look on her, but Romeo may not.

BELLE: Roman? Roman!

-Roman, I don't seem to have a part any more.

-What?

I'm not in any scenes.

How could she do that me? You swore this would be my big break.

And it will be, I promise you.

This is still far too tight.

I just followed your instructions.

I'm not in the Chippendales!

But you said...

What exactly are you implying? Go on.

I dare you.

Tell me I'm fat.

Look, I can only apologise.

-You're fired!

-Wait. What? I can fix it.

The minute I find a replacement, you can go.

This has the names of all the cast.

Fabulous, I'll start looking into them.

Oh, she's not really fired, is she?

You have to set an example, my young friend.

The cast are grumbling, it'll soon shut them up.

-Now, have you learnt anything?

-Erm...

I only just got here.

We'll have to fix that, then.

Roman?

-A word, if I may.

-Sally.

This is Sebastian.

Make a wonderful page to Paris, don't you think?

But with better lines.

Three years of RADA at your service.

Sorry, I...

You're a star, you are.

Hey, you should work on the stage.

Anyway, thanks, yes.

PHONE RINGS

-Hello.

-Yeah, listen. I've got the name of the bloke who kicked off at the preview.

Ooh, get you!

He paid for his ticket with a credit card.

He's called...er, Doug Lambie.

Doug Lambie? Hold on a minute. I know that name.

Yeah, he's on the, er, hotel guest list.

What, you memorised all the names?

We all have a gift, Frank. Yours will reveal itself. Eventually.

Er, let me think.

He's in Room 48.

Bingo. How good are we?

Er, listen, we did agree a flat fee with Sally, didn't we? Not an hourly rate?

I'll see you at the hotel. And, yes, if she asks, it was a flat fee.

Bye. Oh, bye, then!

KNOCK ON DOOR

So, how do you want to do this? Cos, like, he might be unhinged, a bit dangerous.

What, now, you bring that up?

I think he must be out.

-Hello?

-Oh, ha! Would you believe it?

Er, we've...we've locked ourselves out, and my car keys are in the room, so...

I know what it looks like - a handsome married man with some young blonde floozy.

But we are deeply in love.

-Yes.

-Argh! We are.

And we deeply need to see our spouses, so...if you could...

-OK.

-Thank you.

-Thank you.

Welcome!

Come on, babe.

Once more around the world!

Floozy! What are we looking for?

A nice big tin of red paint would be nice.

Need a password.

The only thing criminal in here is his taste in clothes.

Oh, eh!

Looks like my old maths teacher.

-What you doing?

-Looking for fingerprints.

You know the marks where he's been swiping in the password.

And I think it looks like it might be a B.

-Hello!

-Good work, Lu.

Right, what we got?

Er, mostly work e-mails.

Just schedules, rotas, supplies.

Looks like Doug Lambie is an area sales manager for Lovely Buds Garden Centres.

What, there's nothing about Shakespeare? No annual subscription to I Love Willie?

Not a dicky bird.

Well, maybe he's not our man.

He's staying in the same hotel as Sally.

Ah, well, we'd better not forget about the other 50 guests that are staying there as well.

Two words, Frank - Celebrity Stalker.

Four words, Lu - stop reading those trashy magazines.

That's five.

Get in the car. He'll be back in a minute.

-We could be here hours.

-Mm.

Oh, look, look.

Sally has got her own section on the soap website.

Ooh. And there's a link here.

You can watch the episodes.

-MUSIC FROM SOAP PLAYS

-Can't you get the footie on that instead?

I do love a soap.

'Don't know why I bothered turning up for this interview.

'They're bound to pick you for Senior Staff Nurse.

'Me? Oh, I don't stand a chance against you, Nora.

'You're everybody's darling.

-'Did I tell you my mum had to go into a home?

-No.'

What a load of rubbish!

-'When was this?

-Last night.

'It's going to cost me an arm and a leg.

'You'll get help with that.

'What I need is a pay rise.

'And you're going to tell them that in interview, aren't you?

'Me? Never. I wouldn't use that.

'It's all about the right person for the right job.

'We're professionals, Wendy.

'Since when have you and him been friends?

'Oh...since last night.

'Wait, he's on the interview panel, in't he?

'Is he? He kept that quiet.

'I think I might have a cup of coffee.

'Fancy one?

'Milk, two sugars.

'Coming right up.

'Two coffees, please.'

What a load of rubbish! No wonder they cancelled it.

Yeah, I know.

RAIN DRUMS ON CAR

-Shall we watch some more?

-Aye, go on, then.

MUSIC FROM SOAP PLAYS

I've got theatres screaming down the phone at me.

Word's got out since the preview.

They're threatening to pull out of the tour.

Well, that'll change after press night.

We'll be laughing stock, Sally.

This right here is career suicide.

I helped forge your career.

I'll hardly destroy it now.

Sally, Sally, I really need you to think about this very carefully.

These threats against your life, they didn't appear out of thin air.

People do not like what you're doing to the show.

And I've got private investigators looking into it.

You have? Since when?

You look worried, Roman.

Well, aren't you? I mean, what if these people you've hired dig too deep?

-I've nothing to hide.

-OK, well, perhaps you should say that to Martha Weathers,

-and the rewrite you did for her.

-You benefitted, Roman, just like I did.

-Antonia?

-I'm still not proud of what I did.

-WHISPERS:

-Are they arguing?

-I think so.

Is it about me? Am I being written back in?

I don't know, Belle, I can't quite make out what they're saying.

What is this?

Um, I fixed Sally's dress for the matinee, and I was hoping you could put in a good word for me.

-I just really need this job.

-Move.

-Roman, wait.

Oh!

'I don't know what happened. We were outside waiting to get called

'for our interviews, happily drinking coffee.'

What? Happily drinking poisoned coffee, she means.

Yeah! That Nurse Claret, she is trouble, yeah?

Oh, there goes the evidence!

FRANK CHUCKLES

And into resus.

Have we got time for one more?

Oh, pause that a sec.

Well, well.

O, look! Methinks I see my cousin's ghost

seeking out Romeo, that did spit his body upon a rapier's point.

Stay, Tybalt, stay!

Romeo, Romeo, Romeo!

Here's drink.

I drink to thee.

How eerie.

I have not succumbed to sleep.

I think getting sacked might turn out to be a blessing.

If anything, this potion is making me feel stronger.

I feel its...

SHE COUGHS

I feel its nourishing strength...

SHE COUGHS

..enriching my womanhood.

She's very convincing.

SHE COUGHS, RETCHES

Help me!

Actually, it's verging on ham now.

House lights, please! House lights!

Ladies and gentlemen, if I could have your attention, please.

Can I ask you all to make your way to the exits as quickly as possible?

-You're going to be OK.

-Juliet lives on!

I guess you could say the writing was on the window.

-Oh!

-Don't need the sarcasm, Frank.

-I'm just saying.

-What are you guys doing here, anyway?

Sally's our client.

She wanted us to catch the man that's been threatening her.

Great job. Keep up the good work.

-So, did you get anywhere?

-Tell you what, I'll do you a trade.

You first.

OK, well, it looks like someone spiked Juliet's drink backstage.

So I'm going to ask them to rush through the tox report.

She's been poisoned? Ah, just like Wendy, in the soap.

What soap?

If you've got something, spill.

Well, we've been looking into this guy, Doug Lambie.

Staying at the same hotel as Sally.

Yeah, we think he might be some kind of Shakespeare nut, you know,

that hates then way she's changed Romeo and Juliet.

-"We"?

-Wait, you think that someone would kill over that?

-It's still a lead, Sergeant.

-Oh, that's the best thing I've heard.

-Come on.

-Yeah, and it's our lead.

So... We tracked him down, didn't we?

-You know what this means now.

-What, I'm going to play Juliet?

The show must go on, Belle. It's time for the understudy to step up.

-And me?

-We'll talk.

Heads up, everyone! We're going back to the original text.

Shakespeare can stop spinning in his grave.

LAUGHTER

-You wanted to see me?

-Ah, yes.

I need you to take Belle for a costume fitting,

and I need everything finished by tomorrow morning.

-I've got my job back?

-Yes!

Now get on with it, time is precious.

You won't regret it, I promise.

Er, OK, so... Oh, my God, this is so exciting!

Seems like that poisoning couldn't come too soon.

Never seen so many happy faces.

Yep. Well, thanks for the update.

Marlowe's taken Doug Lambie in for questioning.

It seems he was seen leaving the theatre earlier.

Oh, well, you'd better send Sally a bill, Sebastian.

If she's still strong enough to write the cheque.

What are you doing?

I want to find out if Wendy lives or dies.

You're addicted!

I loved this show when it was on.

I'd just turned 15, and I was desperate to marry a doctor.

Well, what about that? Roman Randall was in charge of Ward 9?

How did he go from running a soap opera

to award-winning theatre director?

-What, is that unusual?

-It's not exactly de rigeur.

Mind you, he probably regrets it now,

the way he and Sally were arguing.

-When was this?

-It was a right old ding-dong.

Shortly before she was poisoned.

Ah. Perhaps I should've told you that.

-What was the row about?

-I didn't quite catch...

any of it.

-What?!

-Sorry.

You were supposed to be undercover, winkling out clues.

What's the big deal? The police have made an arrest.

'I'm right here, Wendy.

'I think that promotion is yours.'

MACHINE BEEPS

MACHINE FLATLINES

'Oh, Wendy.

'You welcomed me to the hospital with open arms,

'and I'll never forget that.

'And when I get that promotion, I'll dedicate it to you.

'I'll tell them that everything I learned, I learned from you.

'That if you hadn't died so suddenly,

'that you would be striding around as senior staff nurse.'

I don't get it. Why kill off a good character and keep a rotten one?

I think it's called showbiz, Frank.

-Wendy was great.

-Mm.

-Are you two crying?

-No!

-No!

How are you feeling?

Dreadful, they've been taking all sorts of bloods and samples,

and still no-one's told me when I can leave.

Well, at least you're in the best place.

And, erm, Belle is going to step in for you tomorrow evening.

Belle?

Over my dead body, Roman.

Quite literally, after today.

-I'm going to be going on, not her.

-Somebody tried to kill you, Sally.

Yeah, and I believe they've made an arrest.

Now, can you get me a doctor? I need to get out of here.

Just met with Marlowe. They've released Doug Lambie.

No! We handed him to her on a plate.

Yeah. No-one could place him backstage at the matinee.

Plus, he doesn't know anything about Shakespeare.

-He's not the uber fan you thought he was.

-Oh!

Let's park him for a minute.

What about these three?

Far too happy when Sally was poisoned.

The CCTV at the hotel's broken. but we know the message was written

on the window some time before 7.30am,

because that's roughly when Sally opened the curtains.

Who knew vandals were early risers?

Can you remember anybody else who was staying at the hotel?

These two.

Hang on.

What, the star and the director were staying at some big posh hotel,

and the understudy was staying there as well?

Why wasn't she lumped in somewhere with the rest of the minor players?

Ah. Now, I'm not entirely sure, but I did get the impression

that Roman and Belle were a little bit familiar with each other.

It's lovely the way you over share, Sebastian.

So, Roman moved her into his hotel.

With Sally out of the way, Belle was free to star as Juliet.

And Roman gets to save his reputation. It's perfect.

-Sebastian, start looking into Belle.

-I'll go and see Roman.

And let's not forget Antonia - she'd been sacked by Sally.

Again, over sharing.

Thank you, Sebastian.

People have killed for a lot less.

You promised me Roman, you said you'd make me a star.

Blame Sally. I mean, what does it take to finish her off?

Mr Randall.

Hi, Lu Shakespeare from Shakespeare and Hathaway Private Investigators.

-Have you got a minute?

-Oh, you're the people Sally hired.

That's right. Yeah, and, erm, I do know that you and Sally

were having an argument before she was poisoned.

It was purely a creative discussion. End of.

Are you married, Mr Randall?

-I spotted the ring.

-Then why are you asking?

Oh, I, er, I think you both know why I'm asking.

What was the argument really about?

Who are you, anyway?

I'll tell you, shall I? Nobody.

-I don't need to talk to you.

-It won't just be me asking.

The police are going to want to know, too.

-Look, Roman, I think...

-Ignore her.

Oh!

Well, a lot of people have tried that.

Doesn't mean I'm going to go away.

-'You're dead! You're dead!'

-SHE SCREAMS

'You're dead! You're dead! You're dead! You're dead!'

I thought they'd arrested this maniac.

Not enough evidence to hold him.

So, he's still out there, this Doug person?

Look, we don't even know if it's him.

This is our case, Frank, butt out.

Well, you won't want to know how the teddy was delivered, then, will you?

Courier service.

Someone called Mr Baloo left cash and the teddy for collection.

Mr Baloo? And no-one thought that was made up?

I don't know what's wrong with people.

I need to go back to my hotel.

I can't go ahead with tomorrow night's performance now.

Listen, you were going back on stage. Who knew that?

I told Roman.

I presume he may have told others.

PHONE RINGS

It's Lu. Excuse me.

Right, what have you got?

So, Roman didn't want to speak to me,

which made me think he was hiding something.

So I had to go back a few years, but I found this review.

Cos Sebastian did say it seemed odd that

he basically switched professions overnight.

So, he put on a play, so what?

Exactly. So I did a bit more digging,

and it turns out that his first wife divorced him on grounds of adultery

- took him for every penny he had -

but he still somehow found the money to stage a play.

Is this going anywhere?

-Only I've got a full and happy life waiting for me.

-Patience, Frank.

So, Roman formed a limited company with none other than Sally.

She financed his play to the tune of £30,000.

HE WHISTLES

I know, right? That's a lot of money to give to a man

with no previous experience of directing theatre. Right?

-Mm, I see what you're driving at.

-Thank you.

Just get there quicker next time.

Look at it! Look at it!

Someone needs to tell Sebastian that we are professionals.

Where's the recording of the threat?

Lu, the teddy bear didn't do it. I will stake my reputation on it.

We never tried slowing it down.

We need to talk pay rise.

I know Belle's real surname.

Turns out she changed it to Roehampton from...

SHE MUTTERS TO HERSELF

Hello.

-What's this?

-Well, we thought we've not been properly introduced yet.

Yeah, I'm not speaking to her, or you.

Before you go, tell me about this burning desire to play Juliet.

One of the greatest roles in one of the greatest plays ever.

Goodbye.

-RECORDING:

-You're dead! You're dead!

-Oh, wrong recording.

Should you two be allowed out unaccompanied?

-SLOWED DOWN:

-You're dead! You're dead!

That is your voice, isn't it, Belle?

Yeah, it could be one of a million people.

Yeah, but you're the only one with the surname Lambie.

-Doug Lambie's your dad, isn't he?

-So?

Well, he couldn't get backstage to deliver the poison, but you could.

-Anything to get that part.

-Look, I did no such thing.

-Classic case of misdirection.

-Classic.

Your dad berates Sally, while you work secretly in the background,

-plotting to get rid of her.

-So he looks like the prime suspect,

-when actually he's done nothing wrong.

-No, no, no...

Absolutely not. I swear.

Well, the police got the toxicology report back this morning.

Weedkiller.

Although Sally would have to drink a litre before it killed her.

Pretty amateur attempt at murder,

but then you're both amateurs, aren't you?

Yes, and thanks to his job at the garden centre,

your dad had easy access to weedkiller, didn't he?

Well, who hasn't? Anyone can buy it.

Is that really all you've got?

Well, the forensics on the vial that Sally drank from

-are going to come back soon.

-Even better,

because I never touched it, not once.

You know that threat you painted on the window?

Have you still got the paint in your room? Because if you haven't,

they'll find traces on your clothes.

Look, maybe me and Dad did try and scare Sally into

quitting the show, and maybe I do want to be a star,

but we're not killers.

Not now we're onto you.

Trust me, you can't prove something that isn't true.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I've a costume fitting with Antonia.

So what now?

You don't have to do this, Sally. We're really close.

I'm leaving the play. I got the message loud and clear.

We found out you funded Roman's first play.

So what? I could afford a few hundred pounds.

We were under the impression it was more like 30K.

Well, it was a long time ago.

Now, if you'll excuse me, my nerves are in shreds.

Why would she lie?

SOAP OPERA HOSPITAL SCENE PLAYS

'Oh, Wendy,

'you welcomed me into the hospital with open arms,

'and I'll never forget that.

'And when I get that promotion, I'll dedicate it to you.

'I'll tell them that everything I learned...'

VIDEO STOPS

So, a soap character gets poisoned, and then the actress playing

the poisoner gets the same treatment ten years later.

I mean, what do you make of that?

Er, bearing in mind that Roman was running the soap opera back then.

And he got £30,000 from Sally.

So, what if Sally bribed him to kill off the Wendy character?

And the actress playing Wendy wants revenge.

Ten years later, though. Who waits that long?

I think we should find her, don't you?

Well, er, thanks for agreeing to see us at such short notice, Martha.

It's, er....

We've been watching Ward 9. We're big fans now, aren't we?

-Oh, yeah, big fans.

-Thank you.

Would you like a cup of tea?

Oh!

We were really upset when your character died.

Looks like you were the Queen of Soapland.

We appear to be out of tea. Never mind, please sit.

Oh! Oh! Ah!

So, erm, we checked the TV and film database,

and it looks like you didn't stay in acting.

-I did try.

-But?

I was Nurse Wendy. No-one wanted me as anyone else.

That's a shame, I could do with a nurse right now. Ooh!

Well, we thought you were great.

And so did the press, by the looks of things.

Why would they kill off such a popular character?

-The producer never said.

-What, it was Roman's decision?

I got the script, and it had been changed at the last minute.

-He didn't even warn me.

-Ah, that's brutal, that is..

Remind me not to go into telly.

When you say "changed," what do you mean?

Sally's character was meant to be killed off, not mine.

Are you sure about that?

All of that...to this.

Tell me, did you really like my performance?

You can tell me over a cup of tea. Would you like one?

Yep.

Oh, my word.

-Roman!

-I don't care.

I've got you, I've got a play that everyone's going to love,

and best of all, Sally is dead.

Or at least resting, as they say.

I can't thank you enough for keeping me on.

We're all one big happy family now.

-Good luck, you.

-I'll see you later.

-You'll be brilliant.

Belle, visitor.

Can I get an autograph before you get too famous?

Dad!

Erm, those investigators. They know we were threatening Sally.

And have we been arrested? The show must go on, Belle.

Always.

I know you didn't succeed,

but I thought I should at least pay you for your time.

We're still on the case, Sally. Belle and her dad were trying to

scare you, but we're not convinced they were trying to kill you.

It was Belle? That little minx!

-Roman never could pick a winner.

-There is still someone out there.

Yes, but I've quit the play, whoever it is has got their wish.

We went to see Martha Weathers today.

Martha? Last I heard, she'd, er, had a breakdown.

-How is she?

-Still broken.

In fact I'd say she badly needs looking after,

so, if you've got a spare 30,000...

You were going to be written out of Ward 9,

until you went to Roman Randall and offered him 30k to stage his play.

Yeah, not the few hundred pounds that you claimed.

Why lie about it?

Unless it was a bribe to get Roman to change his mind

-about which nurse to kill off.

-Don't just blame me.

Roman jumped at the chance. His wife took him for every penny.

Did Roman want to become a theatre director? Is that what it was?

Did you promise him you could make it happen for him?

Sally, surely not? Don't do this to me.

I was a big star back then, Sebastian.

Something you might never experience.

Found it very hard to let go.

I was in love with the fame, magazine covers,

the red carpets at award nights.

It's something I couldn't give up very easily.

Is Martha angry with me?

She didn't know anything about it...

which killed one of our theories stone dead.

Well, I hope this can remain our secret.

-Anyway, I must go to the theatre.

-I don't think that's wise.

And deny me the pleasure of seeing how utterly terrible Belle is?

It'll be a joy sacking her after.

So, who we left with now?

What? Sally just paid, job's done.

Can't leave it alone now!

It's just the way I am.

OK.

So, Roman's got his reputation back.

-Is that enough to kill for?

-Well, it could be.

It could be another dead end.

We're pretty good at finding those lately.

Oh, come on, Grumpy McGrumpface. Let's go over what we know, then.

Right...

O, be some other name!

'Belle is set to be a star...'

What's in a name? That which we call a rose

by any other name would smell as sweet.

'Doug Lambie would do anything for his daughter.'

So Romeo would, were he not Romeo call'd...

'Roman, as we know, benefits hugely.

'And Antonia gets to keep her job.'

Romeo, doff thy name, and take from that name,

which is no part of thee, take all myself.

Of course!

We appear to be out of tea.

Martha said "we".

Someone was looking after her. She couldn't give us a cup of tea,

because she didn't know where it was kept.

You'll have to explain the relevance.

Belle wasn't the only person who changed her name.

No! Still as clear as mud.

The row Sally and Roman had - do you remember it?

-I told you before...

-It doesn't matter what it was about.

It matters who heard it.

Get on the phone to Sally, tell her to get out of the theatre.

That's the last place she should've gone.

Well, that was utterly dreadful.

Christina, get to the theatre as soon as you can.

-Come on!

-This is a residential area.

-Come on!

-Where is she?

-Up there.

Oh, why did she have to be so high up?

No! I don't understand!

No, please!

I won't jump, not for anyone.

You don't want to do that.

Do you, Antonia?

So far, no-one's been badly hurt, but it's a long way down.

It's been a long way down for the last ten years.

Yeah, we know. We know. We went to see Martha.

She can't fend for herself.

You've been there, haven't you, looking after her?

Ah, I sat on your pin cushion.

Oh! Oh! Ah!

It's Martha Weathers, used to be Martha Briars.

She's your big sister, isn't she?

She changed her surname. A lot of actors do that.

Is it when you overheard the row between Sally and Roman?

Is that when you realised what she'd done to Martha?

You look worried, Roman.

Aren't you? I mean, what if these people you've hired dig too deep?

-I've got nothing to hide.

-OK, well, perhaps you should

say that to Martha Weathers and the rewrite you did for her.

Suddenly it clicked, didn't it?

Sally just can't stop changing scripts.

'And the next thing I know, Wendy is writhing around on the floor,

'clutching her stomach.'

Nice bit of symmetry, mm?

Poisoning Sally like Nora poisoned Wendy in the soap.

I think it's called resonance.

Take one more step, and I'll do it. I will.

Do you want to spend the rest of your life in prison?

Who's going to look after Martha?

You saw her, you saw what killing her character did to her.

Martha used to be amazing.

She was lively, loving, talented,

and Sally took all that away from her.

She killed her twice over.

All those posters and pictures on her wall.

People used to adore her, and now all she's got is me.

Everyone's forgotten her.

This is not the answer, Antonia.

There's a big difference between killing someone on a page

and killing them for real.

-She needs to pay for what she's done!

-She will.

No-one's going to want to work with Sally again, or Roman.

You've won, Antonia.

You did right by Martha.

FOOTSTEPS Better late than never.

I didn't know it would come to this. If I had, I...

You'd have done exactly same thing.

All you're interested in is walking down the red carpet.

I wouldn't like her to take my temperature.

Don't know where that thermometer's been.

-The reviews are in!

-Oh!

-Listen to this.

"Belle Roehampton should have spared us all

-"and drunk the poison in the first act."

-Ho-ho!

"And Roman Randall's direction had more in common with a

"pre-school panto, but at least those are usually charming."

Ho-ho! There's two more deaths right there.

-Sh. Shush. Shush.

-Come back, Sally, all is forgiven.

Will you be quiet, both of you?

'See if I can organise a slot for her ASAP.

'It's her only hope.'

Frank, what are you doing?!

Two words, Lu - the end.