Bubble Trouble ROY

This is the story of Roy O'Brien.

He lives in an ordinary house on an ordinary street,

the only trouble is, he doesn't look very ordinary.

All Roy really wants is to fit in,

but it's very hard to stay out of trouble when you're a cartoon.

-HE YELLS:

-Royyyy!

THEY SCREAM

-SHE SHOUTS:

-Roy!

-HE SHOUTS:

-Roy!

Things appear to be getting a little tight

around the O'Brien household...

Come on! Fit!

SHE INHALES

That never normally works for me.

You should try jumping up and down

while holding your belly in.

Or you could try a pair of my jeans.

Coming, Da.

Yeah, just going to drop him at school.

Good idea, Bill.

Whoo! Ooh!

I never thought I'd wish for class to start so early.

It's freezing out here!

Huh?

Property of Roy O'Brien?

Um, I'm not sure you if you should open that.

-Open it! Open it!

-OK!

It's just a load of balloons.

Whoa!

THEY COUGH

I worked ages on that booby trap...

and it was worth it!

THEY LAUGH

TEETH CLATTER: S-so s-sick of D-D-eco!

-And for you, Roy.

-TEETH CLATTER: So cold.

Class almost f-finished.

Hang in there, R-R-Roy.

At least this day can't get any worse.

BELL RINGS

OK, everyone, remember to read chapter three for tomorrow, OK?

How are you, son? Are you all right?

Da, I feel sick.

You poor thing, you.

You know what, I'd offer you some comfort food

but your mother couldn't fit into her jeans this morning

and she's going mad trying to get fit.

-Oh, no.

-I know, she's thrown out all the nice food.

-Sausages?!

-Yeah.

Look, all what's left is this... bird seed and salad stuff.

I can't even watch the match cos she's in there doing her do

jujitsu, feng shui, karate, keep fit thingy.

So glad I found this ice cream...

..hidden behind the frozen peas.

Time for seconds!

Hmm, can't decide if I should have chocolate or vanilla.

Both?

Great idea, Ma!

Are you sure you don't want a bowl?

Oh, yeah, you can't.

Ah, well, more for me!

That looks deadly!

-Can I join in?

-Sure, Roy.

Let's go.

And a one,

and a two,

and down.

And salute that sun.

And up and here

and...HA!

Spirulina and spinach smoothie.

Is that, um... Is that not the same stuff

that you put on your face last night?

-Uh!

-It'll do you good!

-Mind me six pack.

More like a 36 pack.

-HE SHRILLS:

-"More like a 36 pack."

Here, sweetheart.

Wouldn't want you to starve now, would I, huh?

Enjoy.

-Right, cheers.

-Cheers, love.

Ugh, I'm so full of mucus, even my thought bubbles are filling up

with green, slimy gunge.

Ugh!

I don't know why I have to suffer just

because you can't fit into your jeans.

Mine fit perfectly.

It's great being young, you can eat what you want.

Yeah, yeah, well, enjoy it while you can

if you have your father's genes too.

No wonder you fit into them, Da's jeans are massive.

Uh, hello, excuse me,

yes, I am actually still in the room, thank you.

Genetics, Roy. Genes, not jeans.

Oh, right.

I just don't understand it.

I'm the one who eats healthy in this house

yet I'm the one who can't fit into her jeans.

I'm really proud of Bill though.

He hasn't eaten a single chip or bit of chocolate

since we started eating right.

I wonder if I could get him into yoga.

It really is brilliant.

I'm a new woman. (Watch this.)

Ooh!

Hey, Roy!

THEY LAUGH Grr!

Kissy, kissy, Roy.

Do you know what,

I reckon Tara would love to see this.

Give it back, or else!

Or else what, genius?

Or else I release the power of my awesome jujitsu.

THEY LAUGH

He's doing yoga!

My ma does that!

Yoga?

Your days of messing with the Royster are over...genius!

THEY CHEER

Ah, minds for moulding.

HE SNEEZES

Whoa! Ooh!

No way!

This can't be good.

Ahhhh.

OK, just cough for me, Deco.

No problem, Rashers.

Do...Doctor Rashid.

HE COUGHS AND HONKS

Well, this is incredible!

I mean, it's a typical cartoon flu for Roy,

but it's the first time it's crossed over to humans.

We're witnessing history!

I'm going to call it bubble-itis.

Is it serious?

No, I don't think so.

I mean, I'd say that the worst of the symptoms should pass

in a few days, the cartoon honking when coughing,

the uncontrollable thought bubbles...

TROMBONE SOUNDS

-..trombone sneezing.

-Is it contagious, doctor?

Well, none of the other kids seem to have got it,

so I'd have to say no.

But, um, I mean, I think

Deco was just unlucky to have come into contact

with Roy's cartoon gunge.

Right.

But we should be careful with Roy's thought bubbles just in case.

Try not to think of anything for a few days, OK, Roy?

Easy peasy. I'm an expert.

This is horrible.

Everyone can see what I'm thinking.

Not as if I have anything to hide though.

HE SIGHS

Don't look at me!

This hall pass is for 11.30, it's now 11.31.

One minute has expired.

HE SHOUTS 'Stop running in the corridor!'

HE LAUGHS

Do you take me some kind of fool, young man?

No, sir.

Stop it, brain!

I have never been so insulted in all my life!

Trust me, O'Leary, there will be consequences!

Come on, up to class.

Wow, he looks really down.

I'm not surprised.

The teachers are holding a meeting to discuss Deco's

antisocial thought behaviour.

Maybe they'll suspend him.

No-one's ever been suspended before.

THUNDER CRACKS

Well, it is really hard when people can see everything you feel.

Maybe I should help him.

Roy is insane for wanting to help Deco at all.

Well, I think Roy is being very kind.

Yeah, but Deco doesn't understand kind.

I'd love to have cartoon bubbles,

it'd be like texting with your brain!

Yeah, you'd need a brain first.

HE LAUGHS

Deco's one of my best students.

It's very out of character for him.

Out of character or not, there must be consequences.

-IT BOINGS

-What's that?!

We know it's you, Roy.

Sorry for sticking my nose...erm, eye in,

but I heard that you were discussing Deco's thought bubbles and...

This is not a public meeting, O'Brien.

No, no, no, go ahead, Roy.

We could do with a cartoon boy's point of view.

Well, one of the hardest things about being a cartoon

is having to deal with bubbles.

They just keep happening.

Sometimes you just can't stop them like a burp or a...

HE BREAKS WIND

Oh, wow, perfect timing, yeah.

Thank you, O'Brien,

we appreciate your...unique and rather fragrant input.

Time to go.

Well, that was very insightful.

I think we need to view Declan's thought bubbles from a holistic

and considerate position.

He's insulted me publicly!

He needs to be suspended.

Derek, this school works on positive reinforcement

not old-fashioned punishments.

Well, we'll see what the board think of this.

Look, I'll speak to Declan.

I know there won't be any further problems.

HE LAUGHS INCREDULOUSLY

Well, we'll try it your way, Ms Jervis,

but if anything like this happens again, we'll deal with it my way...

using good, old-fashioned discipline!

Fine.

(Never going to happen.)

Ms Jervis fails to realise that without rules there is chaos.

This is the result of following rules.

Someone has to stand up to Jervis...sorry, "Jane"

and her progressive disciplinary methods.

It's time this school had a leader who believes in real discipline!

Excuse me.

Sir.

You marked one of my questions wrong when it's actually right.

May I remind you, Declan, that you are the student here

and I am the teacher!

Think of something nice.

-CLASS:

-Aww!

Perfect, Deco!

TRICKLING

O'Leary, to my study now.

I'm going to recommend that you be expelled, Declan.

Aw, what! Please, don't.

I'm always top of your class!

I'm sorry it has to be you of all students, but rules are rules.

We've tried it Ms Jervis' way, now it's time to do it my way.

It'll soon become clear who should really be principal in this school.

HE SNORTS

Thanks for nothing, Roy.

You've made everything worse.

I'm being kicked out!

But...but...

Thanks to you, my ma has to come into school and everything!

You're toast, Roy.

Argh!

But it's not my fault!

-Yeah, we know.

-Huh?

Look, I know he'd never admit this to anyone

but Deco is really a big mammy's boy.

Really?

She'll be devastated if he gets kicked out.

Can't let that happen.

It'd destroy him.

This is the first school he's ever liked.

Wow, I didn't know.

But I already tried, I just made it worse.

But it can't get any worse, he's getting kicked out.

You're a cartoon. This is a cartoon problem. Deal with it.

Before tomorrow!

Or else.

Huh...

What's with the spacesuit? Did Ma eat Brussels sprouts again?

No, worse.

She's caught your bubble-itis!

Oh, no!

Yep, and Becky too.

Now they can see what the other one is really thinking.

They have been at each other's throats all day.

It's like a warzone in there.

-Right, I won't be going in there so.

-Sit down.

Are you going to eat those?

Well, I'm not now, am I?

After you putting your infectious paws all over them!

I have to be really careful, son.

I can't catch bubble-itis.

If your mother knew what I was really thinking half of the time...

Aw, I'd be dead!

Sometimes too much truth can be a bad thing.

But I thought truth was supposed to be a good thing.

Oh, yeah. Oh, no, it is, it is,

but sometimes it's better to wrap things up a little white lie.

What?

Ha-ha. Hey, that's karma.

What?

Karma.

The frog?

Oh, curry?

Oh, chicken korma, chicken korma, chicken korma, chicken korma,

-chick...

-Raw kale and almond salad -

just what we need to get rid of this awful bubble-itis.

I'm grand on the raw kale, Ma, thanks.

Mm... These are the best crisps I have ever had.

Da, can I have 20 quid? I'm going to the movies after dinner.

No way.

What?!

Not till the weekend. You still have that essay to do.

Oh, so you think I'm some kind of dictator now, do you?

Oh, so you think

I'm a spoiled princess?

I never said that!

Eh, well, it's written

all over your head!

Ha-ha! Now you know what it's like being me! Ha-ha!

Mm... Lovely!

It has a taste of lovely...raw...green stuff.

With overtones of...grass.

Well, I don't know about you,

but I hardly miss any of that food we were poisoning ourselves with.

Ma.

Yes, love?

Er, thanks for the grub.

Ah, you're welcome, love. Here, have some more.

Don't worry, Da, plenty more where that came from.

Come on. Go on.

Wow, I don't want to see Deco being expelled.

Even if he has it in for me.

The only thing is...I haven't got a clue if I can help him.

I said I was sorry!

What's going on?

Your stupid cartoon bubbles are going on, that's what!

Dad said he was sneaking out for some chips.

My cartoon bubble showed him as a big fat whale.

Now he's all upset.

Yikes.

If only he knew what it was like to have a cartoon bubble.

It's all your fault, Roy.

Ugh!

OK, we go into each room before everyone arrives

and you burst one of my gungey thought bubbles in each one.

-BOTH:

-Got it.

OK... Thought bubbles, thought bubbles. Something cool.

That's your idea of something cool?

Er... It's a vampire bunny.

Oh, no! Not now...

I must be getting better!

It's all Ma's healthy cooking.

Roy, I have an idea!

Hold the bucket steady.

And...now!

Aww! Gross! Eurgh!

Now, atomisers!

Operation Green Goblin is go!

SPY MUSIC PLAYS

Nice one, lads.

Derek...

Does it smell weird in here?

Erm...

HE SNIFFS

Aw!

Ugh!

Ugh...

SHE WHISTLES A TUNE

I'm asking for a raise.

Morning, everybody.

Right, let's...

Ugh, ahh!

Em...

Ah, aw!

Eww!

What is this?

Well, eh, I guess that's where that mould experiment

I lost last week ended up.

Ugh... I'm going to vom.

I don't think that's going to help.

Calm down, class, it's just a little harmless mould and bacteria.

Now let's see what our little friends have been up too, shall we?

HE HUMS

Hello, that looks like...

I think that bacteria just winked at me.

ROY CHUCKLES

Ugh, I think I'm getting a cold.

Yeah, me too.

I hope I'm OK for the party at the weekend.

I bought this new dress for it. What do you think?

Pretty cool, huh?

Oh, it's lovely! It really suits you.

SHE SNEEZES

Oh, I'm sorry! It wasn't what I was thinking. I...

Stupid bubble!

That's OK.

You obviously have a better grasp of fashion than I do.

Ahh-choo!

Oh, really?!

Uh-oh, that's not good.

Do you think Abby would ever like me?

Sure!

Ahh-choo!

Ahh-choo!

See, Sean, that's why I like you so much. You might be weird,

but you say and do whatever you think!

Thanks.

Strawberry, excellent choice.

SHE SNEEZES

HE SNEEZES

SHE SNEEZES

Ha-ha, wahay!

Do you think we got enough in the teachers' office?

We'll soon find out. Hey, look!

Yeah, thanks. OK, bye-bye.

KNOCK ON DOOR

NOSE TRUMPETS

-Really, Mr Lucey, do you have...

-KNOCK ON DOOR

-Come in.

-Never mind.

Oh, please, Ms O'Leary, take a seat.

Thank you so much for coming in to see us.

I am so sorry about all of this.

I don't really know what else to say.

Well, I'm sure that we...

Let me be straight with you, Ms...

Declan's mam.

I've always had the highest standards of behaviour

in this school, and despite some people's beliefs

in alternatives to punishment,

I have always had the strong belief that...

SHE SNEEZES

HE SQUAWKS

Sorry, something stuck in my throat there.

I am so sorry. I didn't mean...

Quite clearly, Ms Jervis, you have absolutely no...ahh...ahh...

Ahh-choo!

SHE WAILS

Ahem, ahem. Clearly we all need to...need to...

Ahh...

Ah...almost let that one go. Aa-choo!

KISS SMACKS

Oooh!

Well, obviously this bubble-itis is having very strange

effect on everyone.

I mean, these bubbles are clearly very open to interpretation.

Yes, it is a bit!

What I propose is that we overlook Declan's previous bubble trouble

and we, on behalf of the school,

offer our most sincere apology to Declan and his mum here.

Agreed, agreed.

-But...but...but...but...but!

-What Mr Hammond is trying to say

is that he is personally very, very sorry for this misunderstanding.

Apology accepted.

Ow.

The lads told me what you did for me.

Ah...you're welcome.

Ow!

You get one week off. Then after that, it's business as usual.

You just don't understand me!

Well, you never listen to a word I say!

That's cos I've heard it all a million times before!

Hey, hey, hey. Excuse me for interrupting, ladies,

but I'm starving. What's for tea?

Quinoa and beetroot.

All right, then, Little Miss Perfect, you cook!

Fine! I'll do my veggie tofu risotto.

-Ugh!

-Look at yous, look. Like two peas in a pod.

Both throwing up in your cartoon bubbles.

-BOTH: We're not alike!

-Really?!

-BOTH: She...

-Ah, yeah...

-BOTH: Ugh.

Come on, come on, time for a hug. Hug your mammy. Maura, come on.

-He drives me nuts.

-Tell me about it.

So, can I go to the movies, then?

OK. And your jeans are washed. There you go.

Wait, these aren't mine.

You must've got our jeans mixed up again.

You mean...

Now wait, wait a second!

Now wait a second, that means you were getting upset

about not being able to fit into Becky's jeans.

Ha! So I've been eating cardboard for nothing!

This is the best thing I've ever done all year.

This yoga is really paying off. Lads, this skirt.

All of yee as well, this skirt is a whole size smaller

than what I usually wear. Look, see?

Bill, does my bum look big in this?

-It, erm...

-Got an answer?

-Oh, no!

-Da...

Aa-choo!

Pizza, that's a brilliant idea.

Nice one, Da.

Phew!

Wha...! Whoa!

Whoa!

Stupid chocolate!