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Zoo of the Weird Scream Street

Zoo of the Weird

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# He was a kid who didn't fit in

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# Got a wolf living inside under his skin

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# When he's angry his body sprouts hair

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# So he got a ticket, you'll never guess where

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# Scream, scream, scream

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# When you get to Scream Street

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# Scream, scream, scream

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# When you get to Scream Street

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# Next door's a vampire, maybe not

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# 4,000 years old but her body won't rot

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# Being a freak here is totally normal

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# When everyone's freaking paranormal

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# Scream, scream, scream

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# When you get to Scream Street

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# Scream, scream, scream

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# When you get to Scream Street

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# Scream Street!

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# Scream Street! #

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EVIL LAUGH

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WOOF!

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Stay!

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Sit! Sit, half doggy dude!

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You know, I think he's only got half a brain as well!

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Hmm!

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Try putting him on a lead.

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Sit!

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Good girl! Roll over.

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Ah, way to go, Lulu!

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-That's more like it.

-You're the best, Lulu!

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Have a leech treat, go on.

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-Scabs. You want one?

-Eurgh!

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No.

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Stay. Stay. Here, boy!

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-Seriously?

-Yes.

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Do what you're told, if your wolf within remembers even just

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a bit of this, it might come in useful one day.

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Now, roll over!

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So embarrassing!

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Erm, oh, now...

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you.

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WOOF! Stop it, dude!

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Dig, behave!

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Lulu, no! No! Bad leech!

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Aw, man, not again!

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Lulu, come back!

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Oh! I think I'll have that back!

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Back in the normal world, people thought I was a freak,

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but, in Scream Street...

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Bring back my arm!

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..I'm one of the more normal ones!

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-Oh! Really?

-Sorry, sir.

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Lulu!

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THEY WHISTLE

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-Karla, Karla Black?

-And you are?

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I'm so sorry, normals aren't allowed to know how to get to Scream Street.

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I'm Mayor Sir Otto Sneer, but you can call me Mayor Sir Otto.

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Actually, Otters,

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looking at you I'm not sure I didn't prefer it with a blindfold on!

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SHE LAUGHS MANICALLY

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Otters, you, I like.

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Can't wait to crack on with the hunt.

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-I desperately need to catch a few new specimens.

-Yes.

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Well, first, I'll have to check your paperwork.

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That all looks in order!

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You do realise that the Scream Street Safari is not entirely legal?

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If you're caught, I'll have to deny any knowledge.

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Otters, my mouth is sealed. Just like this chap's.

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MANIC LAUGHTER

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Just let me know which freaks you're after,

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and I'll tell you how best to catch them.

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-Well, first off I'd like a couple of smaller beasties, then...

-Shhhh!

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Someone's coming.

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Lulu!

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Lulu!

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OUT OF BREATH: Oh, got to stop! Lungs coming out of nostrils!

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-I'm really sorry, Doug.

-No biggie, dude.

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Ah! Those two freakish gems are just what I'm after.

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The zombie or the shampire?

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The half doggy thing and the big toothy slug,

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like two hideous starters before the horror main course.

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Ah! I'll take that, thank you.

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As you know, there's only one big item I'm after.

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Do you want to be grossed out?

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Do you want to be so scared you need a change of pants?

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Aha, then the Zoo Of The Weird is for you!

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We've got all of the weirdest, freakiest,

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and scariest creatures on earth.

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Are you ready for the uni-goat?

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Dare you meet the vampster?

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And what about the mer-monkey?

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There's only one rule here, do not feed the animals.

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Yes, do not fall into their cages, or you might get scoffed!

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And, there's more, coming soon, a new star attraction.

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A real live, genuine werewolf.

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SHE HOWLS

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SLURPS

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You're a feisty one!

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-Luke, I told you not to slide down the banisters.

-Where are you off to?

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-I'm meeting Cleo and Rhesus.

-So you finished your homework?

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-Er, yes.

-Why the long pause?

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Because I'm a werewolf.

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BOTH: Back upstairs!

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Gotcha!

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Lulu, Lulu!

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Come here, girl!

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Hmmm, that's not like her, to miss dinner.

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Lulu! Lulu!

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Get in there! Nobody can hear you now!

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Ah, can't wait to get you back to your new home in the normal world.

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Right, time to bag the big prize.

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We'll cover the ground quicker if we split up,

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so you and Rhesus search the town and I'll scope the woods.

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How about you and Rhesus search the town, and I scope the woods?

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-Because I can look after myself.

-Are you saying I can't?

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-HE SIGHS

-Heads or tails?

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Heads.

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It's heads. Luke, you're with Rhe...

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Argh! Typical!

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19,990...

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20,000.

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10, 20,...

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Did you make a mistake?

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No, I just enjoy counting it.

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30, 40.

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Shush! I think I hear something.

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SHUFFLING

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Probably nothing.

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HE SCREAMS

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-Just, er, testing your reflexes.

-Hey, that Doug's arm.

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What's that? You want us to follow you?

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Is Lulu in trouble?

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Ah!

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ROAR!

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HOWLING

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You're all mine, Wolfy, you just don't know it yet.

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-CLEO:

-What on earth...?

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Lulu! Oh, I missed you too, girl.

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Dig!

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Eurgh, gross!

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Good job!

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Hold on, what's this?

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GASPS

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Oh, no!

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-We need to find Luke.

-And fast!

-Lulu, Dig, find Luke. Find Luke.

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That's right, Wolfy, head that way,

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towards the station, you're getting a one-way ticket.

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Oh, no. We're heading towards the ghost train.

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Faster! We need to go faster!

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Luke!

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Roll over!

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19,900... Ow!

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BREAKS WIND

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-KARLA:

-Ow! Boo! Get away, horrid beasts! Ow!

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SCREAMS

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Oh, I've no idea what just happened,

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but I guess I should say thanks.

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-We've got your back, buddy.

-Always.

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You're my best friend in the world and...

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Ah, no, not again!

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Little help here?

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Right, before the movers take her back to the normal world,

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let's give her a dose of her own medicine.

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Hey, I don't suppose you've got a megaphone in there, do you?

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Cloak, megaphone please!

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Oh!

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Yeah, I'll just shout.

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Roll up, roll up, come and see the normal!

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Don't get too close though, she's dangerous.

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So, how do you like it?

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There you are!

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The Doug-Meister is back together.

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Roll up, roll up, do you dare to meet the terrifying normal?

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Obviously, she's not quite as terrifying

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when she's stuck in a cage.

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Oh, ha-ha(!)

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-See you!

-I'm going to get you one day, Wolfy boy.

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One day!

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