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Squawk Sidekick

Squawk

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# We are Splitsboro kids and we go to Sidekick School

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# Learning to be second best while playing by the rules

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# Maxum Man is missing

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# Now we rule the school

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# Flying, smashing, bashing, stomping, looking super cool

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# I'm a sidekick, sidekick - that's the life for me

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# Half-sized super zeros with full-sized super dreams

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# Sidekick, sidekick What an awesome gig!

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# Just like superheroes

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# Just like superzeros

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-# But only half as big

-Sidekick!

-#

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Maxum On Maxum,

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Chapter 523 - Classy Maxum.

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Whether you call it flair, panache or pizzazz,

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to be a superhero, you've gotta have style!

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That's why I paid for a top-notch decorator.

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Well?

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Uh! You call this decorating?

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I call it awful-rating!

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This will not stand!

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What are you doing?! Stop!

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Stop it!

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Now, that's what I call stylin'.

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Maxum stylin'.

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You've ruined my work! You've ruined everything!

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Argh!

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-Grrrrr!

-Hey, now, just hold on there, Mr Fancy Pants.

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This isn't over! We will clash again, Maxum Man!

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Do you hear me?!

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We will clash again!

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HE SOBS

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Remember, kids, to succeed in life, the one thing you've gotta have

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is style!

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Just not this guy's style...

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Und zat is ze latest in my collection

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of Maxum Man, Ze Lost Episodes.

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I have ze whole set!

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-RECORDING OF MAXUM MAN: 'Ha-ha-ha!'

-Please!

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Teaching ME about style?!

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-Check out my hot new video phone.

-Wow!

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I've got one too!

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PHONE RINGS

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Mine is specially designed to send squeaks with just one click.

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All the supers are on Squawker now.

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PHONE BLEEPS A TUNE

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It's Jimtastic!

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JIMTASTIC GRUNTS LOUDLY

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Jimtastic here, just squeaking to all my peeps.

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I'm keeping in shape to keep you safe!

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CRASHING Oh!

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JIMTASTIC WHIMPERS

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I just love knowing every single thing

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that everyone is doing at every moment.

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Now my life is complete.

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SHE KISSES HER PHONE

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Hey, squeak-peeps, Vana here. Time to show off my sidekick skills.

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PHONE BLEEPS

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Hey! It's another message from Vana!

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She's great.

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Squawker is awesome.

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Anyone who is everyone who knows anyone is on it.

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Almost everyone.

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Eric, why isn't Maxum Man on Squawker?

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What's he hiding? What are you hiding?

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ALL: Yeah!

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Huh, erm, Maxum Man is around.

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In fact, he, uh, he is on Squawker!

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Y-Yeah, he's starting this afternoon.

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Urgh, it is simple.

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I combine a Maxum Man 3D rendering with motion capture

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tied to the maxi-image processer in my villain database

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and there you are going.

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I don't understand that at all.

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But OK!

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PHONE BEEPS AND CRACKLES

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IN MAXUM MAN'S VOICE: Wow, it works!

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IN ERIC'S VOICE: People won't think Maxum Man is missing any more.

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He's alive! Alive!

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Wow! Hey, I look awesome!

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So, Eric, when are we going to get a message from Maxum Man?

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-Yeah, Eric, when?

-Um...

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-We'll be right back.

-Whoa!

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OK, here we go.

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Time for another message to my many fans.

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-PHONE BLEEPS

-Huh?

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It's...from Maxum Man!

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PHONES BLEEP

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Maxum Man here. Just defeated the dreaded villain Hal E. Tosis!

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-Whoa!

-CLEANER WHISTLES

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CLEANER GRUNTS AND STRAINS

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Argh!

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Be out in a minute!

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What the...?

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MAXUM MAN'S VOICE: I'll be out in a minute.

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Uh, oh, cleaning crew's here to, uh, you know, clean!

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Uh, gotta go!

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I think it worked.

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Trevor?

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TREVOR BELCHES LOUDLY

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Wow! That was the best squeak ever!

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Everybody will want to know what I think.

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Vana here, squeak-peeps.

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Just saw Maxum Man - that's going to totally be me one day.

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PHONES BLEEP

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ALL: Oh! Whoo-hoo!

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THEY GROAN IN DISAPPOINTMENT

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Aren't you going to watch it?

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It's just Vana.

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I can't tie up the phone in case Maxum Man calls again.

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OK, here goes!

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PHONES BLEEP

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Hee-ya!

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CHEERING

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-TREVOR'S VOICE:

-Ha-ha-ha!

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-VILLAIN'S VOICE:

-'Ha-ha-ha!'

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Whoo-hoo!

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Huh!

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Mmm, Maxum Man is digging Swell Burger's

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Quadruple Bacon Goodness Burger!

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Mmm! You should too!

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Man, you have just stopped even trying.

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PHONES BLEEP

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'Maxum Man is digging Swell Burger's Quadruple Bacon Goodness Burger!'

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RUMBLING AND WHOOPING

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I gotta get me some of that!

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He-he! They're all buying it.

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Why didn't everyone stampede when I said I liked the onion rings?!

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Maybe my days as a squawkstar are over!

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I'm tired of all the lying and deceit.

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One - you're the most popular super ever.

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You gotta give your fans what they want.

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And B - you should never get tired of lying OR deceit!

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SIGHING: Fine. But I'm running out of villains to imaginary pummel.

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-Brain, who's next on the list?

-Hmm.

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There aren't too many left.

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Eww, horse face.

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Eww, thumb face.

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Eww, golf face.

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Eww, girl face. PIG SQUEALS

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Ooh, how about this one?

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-The Wreckorator?

-Oh!

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OK. PHONE BEEPS

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Maxum Man here. Just finished wasting the Wreckorator, blah-blah-blah-blah.

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Maxum Man here. Just finished wasting the Wreckorator, blah-blah-blah-blah.

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What?! That tasteless cad Maxum Man couldn't waste me in his dreams!

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He ruined my designs once,

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but now it's time for me to show the world my style

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by taking out Maxum Man!

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It's been a lot of work, but no-one's asked me about Maxum Man in days.

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And I have like a thousand times more squeak-peeps than Vana!

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That'll show her.

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-CRASHING AND BELL DINGING

-Wow! Cool new door bell!

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Come out, Maxum Man, you mismatched phoney!

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Score!

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You have supervillain fans!

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Hi, uh, I'm Maxum Man's sidekick.

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This is all just a big misunderstanding.

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That message was the final insult to me and my style.

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ZAPPING AND WHOOSHING

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ZAPPING

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WRECKORATOR CACKLES

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Bah!

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My ensemble's not only stylish, but it's waterproof, dirt-proof,

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wrinkle-proof AND...

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laser-proof.

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My hair too!

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Now, where is Maxum Man?

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He destroyed my career!

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I was going to be featured in Super Designers Bi-Weekly!

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Wow, you really hate Maxum Man.

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Maxum Man is the worst!

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Well, except for that awful Vana,

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but she seems to have stopped her infernal squawking for some reason.

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-Hey! He's a Vana follower!

-Yeah, she's SO last week.

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I've got the perfect distraction.

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Vana, look! It's a message from Maxum Man.

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Whoopee(!)

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About you!

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Huh?!

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As the world's greatest hero, I have to tackle some pretty big problems -

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supervillain attacks,

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intergalactic alien warfare and striving for world peace,

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but those things aren't important at all next to Vana.

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Vana, won't you please come back?

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The world needs you and your amazing style!

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Kitty, phone.

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Yes! N'yah!

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PHONE BLEEPS

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Hold on!

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-That's right, squeak-peeps, I'm back.

-Argh!

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-Vana?!

-And I've got a special surprise for my style-star fans.

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It's a rare look inside my super crib!

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Argh! Pink...taffeta...wallpaper!

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Urgh!

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Maxum Man can wait - she must be stopped!

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Huh, maybe I should have thought this through a bit more.

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I never wanted him to attack Vana!

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Uh, I feel great...

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Um, I feel a draught.

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WRECKORATOR SHRIEKS

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This room is an affront to all things stylish!

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It's like the place where ugly comes to die!

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ZAPPING, THEY SCREAM

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Who are you, why are you attacking me

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and how dare you criticise my sense of style?!

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HE CACKLES

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I'm coming, Vana!

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Burnt amber! With your hair colour?! That's just wrong!

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Now, magenta would really make it pop.

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Oh, yeah?! Well, prepare to...

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You know, I was thinking the same thing.

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With maybe a little tangerine accent.

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Tangerine? Hmm...

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That's not bad.

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Vana! I'm here to save...

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VANA GIGGLES

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You have to show me your patent leather picture frames.

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Oh, yes! It'll make the room absolutely fab-oo.

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What's going on? The Wreckorator destroyed your house!

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Ha-ha-ha! Oh, hi, Eric.

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He did me a favour!

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That style was so tired.

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My new look will be pure Wreckorator chic.

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Seriously?! After all that?!

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You know, this whole squawk business isn't turning out

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the way I thought it would.

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Yeah, let's join Wastebook instead.

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Hey, fans. This'll be my last message for a while.

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I'm too busy keeping the world safe,

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but I have one last and very important thing to say.

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PRRT!

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Be nice to Eric! He's the greatest!

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Smooth. Too bad it's all over, though.

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Keeping my fans happy was tiring me out anyway.

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And since no other villains came looking for revenge,

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there's no further downside for the Big E and the T-Bone.

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A-hem!

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THEY SHRIEK

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