Supermodels Sidekick


Supermodels

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# We are Splitsboro kids and we go to Sidekick School

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# Learning to be second best while playing by the rules

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# Maxum Man is missing

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# Now we rule the school

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# Flying, smashing, bashing, stomping, looking super cool

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# I'm a sidekick, sidekick - that's the life for me

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# Half-sized super zeros with full-sized super dreams

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# Sidekick, sidekick What an awesome gig!

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-# Just like superheroes

-Just like superzeros

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# But only half as big - Sidekick! #

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No. No. No. No.

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None of these shirts look right!

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Maybe my hair's the problem.

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Oh! That's not right either!

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Eric, what is it that you are doing so late and so annoyingly?

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Don't start, Brain!

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Tomorrow's picture day and I've never had a good yearbook photo ever.

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Ever!

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ERIC CRIES

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Is having just one good yearbook picture too much to ask for?

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OK! Sorry! I was just trying to...

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Well, things are going to change this year.

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It's my first picture at the Academy and it has to be perfect.

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Perfect hair, perfect outfit.

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Aren't you having only one outfit?

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No. Why would you...

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Ha! One outfit? P-sha!

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You're crazy, Brain.

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All right, Eric, let's get beautiful.

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Oh, you're doing it all wrong.

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OK, so, now look up.

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Don't move!

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Stop squirming!

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You don't want a unibrow.

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Oh, it's you.

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Did you get the stuff?

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One bucket - paint, oil-based.

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One industrial steamer.

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Ten avocados. One blowtorch.

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One pot, oatmeal.

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One honeycomb with bees.

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One cheeseburger. One drum, motor oil,

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and three Orinoco River electric eels. Argh!

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Orinoco? I asked for Amazon, Kitty!

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People have come to expect a certain calibre of photo from me each year

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and you bring me Orinoco eels?

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They'll have to do.

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Time to lock and load, Needles.

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Just remember -

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when in doubt, fierce.

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Just one final touch.

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Ah, bacon grease, delicious and functional.

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Just pray that you are not running into any bonobo monkeys.

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They are mortal enemies of all cured meat.

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Ha! What are the chances of that?

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That's it! You're done!

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Oh, Kitty! I think this is the best makeover I've ever had!

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-I mean, by an amateur, of course.

-Of course.

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Yeah, and that little bit of attitude just cost you your tip.

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I'm so excited about this photo!

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Oh, OK. It's my turn.

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-Hardly. We're going to be late.

-What? But what about my face?

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Here's a moist towelette. Clean yourself up a bit.

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-It is picture day, you know?

-Argh!

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Ah, looking good!

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Better take care of the do, though. Da-da-da, doo-doo-doo.

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MONKEYS HOWL

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Argh!

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Where did they even come from?

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Think I lost them.

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Hiding in garbage, huh?

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Well, at least things can't get any worse.

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Argh!

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OK, now things can't get any worse.

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You know, Kitty, that was a tough morning, but totally worth it.

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If I pass out, please try not to let it swallow my tongue, OK?

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It's no use!

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I'm not going to make it!

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Trevor! Are you OK?

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Yeah, fine. Why?

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You picked a good day to stop a speeding locomotive with your face.

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-What's that under your arm?

-Something cool and it's mine.

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HE GROWLS

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Let me see!

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Ha! Now, what does this do?

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SHE MOANS

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How much do you want that thing?

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MONKEYS HOWL

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I knew wearing a Maxum second skin suit was a good idea.

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Now, if I can just make it through the school,

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it will be girl-faced pretty boy Eric photo time.

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Whoa!

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Eric Needles! To where might you be scurrying looking so...

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Alan Amazing! Come on. It's picture day.

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-Ah, but that is precisely why I must stop you.

-What?

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Well, I'm the top dog here in the looks department

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and, even though you have made only a teeny, tiny, minute, microscopic,

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very slight improvement in your appearance,

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it's in the extremely good-looking person's oracle

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that I must assert my dominance over my obviously inferior opponent.

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-What?

-Pummelling, Eric.

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-I'm going to pummel you and ruin your picture day.

-Oh, OK!

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I have no idea what you're talking about.

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That is OK, my friend. You will.

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-A nuclear plasma disruptor!

-Nope.

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An intense-burst microwave emitter!

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Worse. An Ultra-Soak 750!

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A squirt gun? That's not so bad.

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Full of extra-stainy grape juice!

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HE SPLUTTERS

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Sorry!

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My picture is ruined!

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Avenge me!

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I'm fake dead.

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No!

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Monster!

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And now, Eric...

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Hold on one sec.

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..you can kiss your yearbook photo goodbye!

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Not this time.

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So close! Just a few more steps!

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You almost made it.

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So sorry, my friend.

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Nothing truly says ruined like a grape juice stain.

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Sorry, Alan.

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There's a new sheriff in picture town

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and I'm going to have to ask you to grease and desist.

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What is this?

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Bacon! It's a little gross, but how is it supposed to stop me?

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MONKEYS HOWL

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Oh, no!

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Sic'em, boys!

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No!

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It's picture time.

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Eric Needles is here!

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Take my picture!

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Cheese!

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Hold on one sec.

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I want this to be perfect.

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There. Much better.

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Wait. Wasn't there a reason not to use this stuff?

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MONKEYS HOWL

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Oh, right.

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I've been waiting three months for this.

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Now, let's look at some yearbook pictures.

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THEY LAUGH

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Oh, man, that's not seriously what I look like, is it?

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THEY LAUGH

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Well, at least my picture can't be any worse than Trevor's.

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His face looked like a rump roast that day.

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THEY GASP

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I think they missed my good side.

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But how?

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I slipped the photographer a fiver for some super-airbrushing.

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I'm surprised you guys didn't think of that.

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Moment of truth. I can't look!

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PIG SQUEALS

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Oh, come on. It can't be that bad.

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I don't believe it.

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Best picture ever!

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