Appearances Doctors

How much is 25 dollars?

Because apparently we can get a bus to anywhere in Venezuela.

If we can afford to get to Venezuela!

We can. If we take the courier flight. Yep, £300.

That's still a lot.

Oh! £200 if we go next week!

Next week?

Why not? I've got to book the tickets some time.

I thought you wanted to see Angel Falls?

I do. I want to, but I'm not going to just take off without giving notice.

Geoff doesn't care!

Did Andrew give him notice? Mick?

Well, I'm not Mick or Andrew!

OK. How do you want to do it then?

In two weeks? Three weeks?

-Four?

-Don't get angry.

-I'm not.

-It's just not the right time.

OK, I'm sorry.

We'll say something after the re-launch.

Do you promise?

Mum gone already?

What do you think?

I don't suppose there's any chance of a lift?

I thought you were having a "Reading Week"?

I've got some extra work at a bar in town.

-Where does the reading come into it?

-I can do it in my break. Besides, I need the extra money.

Yeah, come on. Hurry up.

So you're still going with them?

Obviously, I am.

-Let me help.

-I don't want any...

-Why won't you wear a maternity dress?

-No, thank you!

Is it not enough that I am sweaty, spotty and disgusting?!

People will make allowances.

-I don't want them to!

-Try bending your knees.

That's exactly what I'm doing!

DRESS RIPS

HE LAUGHS

It's not funny!

-I'm sorry.

-It's going to be ruined!

We'll get you another dress.

Another tent, you mean!

No! I do not need any help.

So, do you think that I should have it up or down?

Down.

Curly or natural?

Natural.

I don't know whether I should have it kind of like up and styled

or something a little bit more classic. What do you think?

I think I'm going to leave it to you and your hairdresser.

Well, I'll have a word with him, but isn't it going to be awkward?

Well, if you think so. Yeah, I'm sure you're right.

I'll pass on the message and call me if you want anything. Right.

Problems?

Julia wants Heston to help with the PCT report, the Additional Services part,

which means that he's going to have to work with Marina.

Ah... That's definitely awkward.

-That's what I said, but she thinks they've got to get used to working together.

-She's right.

Such a shame, isn't it? They were so good together.

Baby, I never said that you were fat!

Just camouflaged!

-Morning.

-Go ahead!

You might as well get it over with.

You're a long way on now!

What? She is!

OK, final stage of transformation. Jack! You made it.

-Welcome to Party Island!

-Hey?

That's the concept, guys, cos this town needs a party! Shall we get things started?

-Fancy dress?

-You're kidding!

It's just for the launch, only it hit me last night.

No chance.

It's a bit of fun!

You should have said something earlier.

I didn't know earlier! Look, mate, let's talk about this, yeah?

Look, I realise I've sprung this on you.

What if you had first pick of the costumes?

They're not that bad!

Seriously, I need this place to pop,

and that is not going to happen with Chuckles and Skinny Boy over there, is it?

Look, we're a team. Otherwise, what's the point?

Are you with us? Say yes!

Yes! Good man!

A pleasure as always, Mrs Hartford.

Please, see yourself out.

Thank you.

-Ow, ow, ow!

-You OK?

You're lurking.

You've got swollen feet.

-Thank you for informing me!

-Why didn't you wear something sensible?

You've already got your way about the stupid dress.

You want me to surrender my feet to you as well?

-That's not what I said.

-No, I'm sick of this.

All morning, people have been gloating like I've got my comeuppance!

Karen's practically drooling at how fat I am.

Let her! You're beautiful to me.

Blah, blah, blah...

And I know how brave you're being.

Only a month to go, remember that.

That's four weeks!

And that's if I'm lucky!

Shhh...

I don't know if I can make it.

Of course you can.

If you take off the silly shoes.

-Go on, for me.

-No!

Why not? They're obviously killing you!

Because if I take them off,

I won't be able to get them on again, will I?

Jack, as agreed, castaway.

Sam, you're a pirate.

-OK.

-Oh, liven up! You're shipmates with Captain Blackbeard.

And he would be?

Ooh-arr, matey! You're looking at him!

I left the beard upstairs.

Is this supposed to be me?

You're Island Girl. Oh yeah, and don't forget this. Mate, put some...

palm trees by the door.

-Aye, Captain.

-Oh I like that!

You don't expect me to wear this? Seriously... Geoff?

You could wear something underneath.

He's so sexist!

-What?

-Have you see this thing?

-Nice shells.

-You don't have to wear them!

Come on. It's not such a big deal.

Right, that's it. I think we should hand in our notice.

What? No.

-Why not?

-Because we agreed to wait!

OK. You don't like your costume, so we'll swap.

What are you doing?

-You can be the pirate.

-That's not what I meant.

-Are you going to get whole hog?

-Sam...

If it makes Emma happy, why not?

THEY CHUCKLE

Oh, Heston!

You're just in time for the kettle.

Thank you...

I think your strainer is here somewhere...

Yes I've got it.

How are you?

Good, yeah! I had a slight problem with Ian.

He's decided that now is the perfect time to renovate his guest bedroom!

Oh!

No, no, it's fine.

I found a hotel and it's, you know, it's absolutely fine.

And... Well, for the meantime, anyway.

If you need help with money or any...

No, no, no.

I can manage.

You're very sweet.

Sorry. I didn't mean to interrupt. It's just, uh...

Oh, yes, yes, yes.

I'll get the files and...

Excellent!

Come on in, me lovelies!

Come on! We've got rum and cocktails half price. That's it.

Welcome to Party Island.

Wench! Get these ladies a drink!

Unbelievable!

-I think he's talking to you.

-Uh-oh!

This is going to be embarrassing.

You'll be fine. You've got the legs for it.

What can I get you, guys?

Can I have a pint of...

Ha-ha-ha-ha!

Mr Haines! I'm an innocent island girl!

I'll believe you.

Get yourself to a pint. You too.

-Oh, thanks!

-Thanks, Geoff!

We don't get this at the Icon.

-Geoff can be OK.

-You ready for one?

Sadly, I'm cursed with being a lightweight.

We're out of nuts. Geoff, we're out of nuts again.

Not from where I'm standing.

Oh, saucy!

Ha-ha-ha!

What does he think he's doing?

Behaving like a tart, if you ask me!

Sam! You do know people are watching?

Look, I think we should swap back.

-What? No!

-It's too weird.

I don't mind. I said I'd do this and I will.

Fine!

KNOCK ON DOOR

It's only me. I just need some sterilizing gel.

Go for it.

Oh, typical! Top shelf!

OK, that's me.

Actually, I couldn't help overhearing you're staying in a hotel.

It's only temporary.

To be honest, I'm not the only one that feels this.

We were so surprised when you and Heston...

When things didn't work out.

Heston didn't tell you?

Well, you know Heston. He's very discreet.

He mentioned you'd ended things.

You know, I don't want to make you feel uncomfortable,

but Heston's never been so happy since you came into his life,

and he's never been so unhappy since you left.

And he'd kill me for telling you this!

I won't say!

I don't want to dismiss the hurt he must have caused,

whatever it is.

He didn't.

Oh, you've obviously still got feelings for him.

Hold on to those.

Cos he might make mistakes, but he's decent.

And that's rare.

What did she say?

Not a lot of detail, but I don't think it's as final as we thought.

Oh! One second. Zara.

I'm expecting a call from Mr Mandelberg. Do we have his results yet?

-Uhm...yes!

-Oh, excellent.

Can you bring them through, please?

It's just that, I'm rather busy.

Well, I'm busy as well!

Well, thanks for nothing!

Can you believe her?

Is it that bad?

No!

I'm not keeping it.

I'm just getting ideas for styles for the wedding!

I'd try a different hairdresser if I were you!

A poodle groomer would have had more subtlety!

My results? Thank you.

It's supposed to be classic.

That's one word for it, yes.

Oh! Immie rang to say that she was going be late.

It's not going to be a problem, is it?

Here you go. Sea Breeze.

That'll put wind in your sails!

7.50.

-Excuse me, lady.

-Oh, Watch those hands!

-Ha-ha-ha!

-Pervert!

-Which one?

Both of you!

BOTH: Oooh! Ha-ha-ha-ha!

-What? It's funny.

-For you.

Fancy a pint?

-No! Geoff?

-Yeah.

Sam and I want to tell you something.

No, we don't! Will you stop behaving like an idiot?

Me?!

You're acting like a spoilt brat!

And you're acting like a... I don't know what!

Why do we have to wait until after the re-launch?

-Because...

-You said when we finished paying our bills, I could book something.

And you can! Except we're in the middle of a promotion.

-I don't think it's very professional to quit!

-Professional?!

-We work in a bar.

-So? I want to do things properly!

-Why?

-Because...

I'm a grown up! And I don't just book things on dodgy courier flights.

They're not dodgy!

Sam, do you want to go or not? Just tell me.

Not here.

What have we got for Maternity Services?

Er... Oh, here we are.

68. No, 72 home visits.

And the follow ups?

Er... Oh, sorry.

KNOCK ON DOOR

Yes?

Oh, greetings, Mrs Tembe!

I have the information from the Campus.

-I took the liberty of collating it for you.

-You're a star!

It is my job to anticipate.

Mrs Bonnaire.

Mrs Tembe.

Well, I...I had better get back.

Thank you.

How are they getting on?

Doctor Carter and Mrs Bonnaire are working together very professionally.

Oh, so there's definitely hope!

That is not what I said.

She means everyone can see how well they complement each other.

Well, I am afraid, I am not so sure.

I remember how she behaved with the Christmas carols.

I imagine she's very difficult to live with.

Don't look at me.

I'm not.

I'm fat.

What? No.

In one week, I've managed to put a massive inch on my hips!

Well, lucky for me that I like you curvy.

You don't get it, do you?

Not only will I be a fat lump on my wedding day,

the dressmaker's only got one week to make alterations,

-which means THEY have to fit perfectly.

-They will. PHONE RINGS

-You're not helping!

-Sorry.

Antoinette?

What news?

It's the wedding scent provider.

How?

What do you mean they've sent the wrong fragrance from Paris!

No!

I don't want to have anyone else's, it's supposed to be bespoke!

Oh. Blue Cow is out.

OK. I'll get Sam to change it. Sam?

Yoohoo!

Blue Cow needs changing.

Yes, Captain!

-Oops, my skirt is falling down.

-Sammie...

What's wrong with him?

-It keeps slipping!

-I'll change it.

Yeah, I think you'd better!

-Oh!

-Sam!

Was it one too many?

My skirt's too long.

-I'd better take him home.

-Are you all right, mate?

-I'm fine.

-I'm taking him.

-What does he want?

-To come with me.

-No!

-Yes, you do! Come on!

-No, I'm stopping.

-Samuel!

No, I don't want to go! Why can't you get it?

You go.

Well, there's one thing for sure, you can't stop here, so up you get!

-I'll take him upstairs.

-I'm slipping.

Don't worry about that.

Are you OK?

He said he was a lightweight and he wasn't kidding!

He still shouldn't have been that bad.

-What do you mean he shouldn't...

-Two shots is all he's had.

You gave him alcohol?

I've seen him drunk loads of times. He's never gone like that!

If he didn't know he was having it. No wonder he was off his head!

-You saw how he was being. Weird!

-So you decided to get him fired?

No! He promised we'd get out of this place.

I was just helping him along.

Now he doesn't want to go anywhere!

People say stuff they don't mean all the time.

It didn't sound like it.

He's been saying we could go for so long.

It's, like, all I want to do.

You can still go.

Cheers!

Finally! Where have you been?

Cherry's on the war path.

I know. Mum?

No time! Get in there. Don't mention the hair! Go on!

KNOCKS ON DOOR

Oh, good, I'm glad you're here!

Right, I need you to try this on and pray that it fits.

OK, but first, you've got to promise not to freak out.

I'm trying not to, but I've spoken to the dressmaker and she's chock-a-block.

Why have you got a hood on?

I had an accident.

Show me.

What?

I'm really sorry! I did try toning it down.

It's actually supposed to be ginger.

That's not ginger!

You do realise that that is going to completely clash.

SHE BREATHES DEEPLY

Oh...

OK. Come on, let's have a look.

Imogen, you're going to have to change it back!

-If I want it to fall out!

-Well, I can't change the dress!

Then we'll fix the styling!

See?

Ha-ha-ha! It's a Fraggle bridesmaid!

This is a disaster!

Says the pot to the kettle!

We need a bit of separation. A different neckline.

-That'll make a big difference(!)

-We can't change the cut.

Yes, we can. I just need...

-Scissors?

-Yes, thank you.

No! There will be no cutting of the dress!

-I'm not changing my hair.

-Can you can take your argument elsewhere?

I don't know. If we could just cover it up somehow.

She looks like a char lady.

What would you do? We've only got three days left!

Why are you saying "we"?!

I'm asking your opinion. You can see this whole thing is falling apart!

You might see, if you were slightly less self-absorbed,

I'm finding it hard enough to drag my big, fat self through the day!

Take your juvenile temper tantrums

and save them for the gullible sod prepared to say 'I do'!

Ah!

Come on... Be a good boy.

No!

-Well, I know what you really want.

-No! Get off! Off!

What's going on?

Oh, nothing. He doesn't know what he's saying.

Sam? Are you OK? What have you done to him?

Me? This is self inflicted.

I keep warning him about the booze, but you know what guys are like.

That's not booze. He's been drugged.

What?! No.

Let's see what the police have to say.

There's no need for that.

Get out!

I'm not leaving without him.

Look, it... it's a misunderstanding, OK?

A misunderstanding?!

He's been coming on to me all day. I mean, you saw him.

You know, I...I just helped him by...by relaxing him!

You can explain to someone else.

This is not easy for me either.

I...I'm a good man! I don't normally do this kind of thing!

Police, please.

Yeah, I'm going to need an ambulance as well.

Jimmi!

Would you give that to Cherry?

Why can't you call her?

Because I'm scared.

KNOCKS ON DOOR

Come in.

There you are!

My first day back. I thought you'd want to join me, but apparently not!

I was getting you these. Ta-da!

To really ram home I've lost my fashion sense!

Well, they're comfortable at least.

I'll leave them here, just in case.

I suppose they might not be so bad just for padding around in here.

Shall we try?

I looked for some Betty-Boop ones, some fluffy ones, but I couldn't.

-Ohh!

-Oh, oh...

I had no idea how difficult this was going to be.

You can always go home.

What and miss all the tantrums and tiaras?

Have you seen Cherry's bouffant?

Talk about hair comes the bride!

-I knew you'd have liked that!

-Ha-ha-ha!

Wow.

KNOCKS ON DOOR

Safe to come in?

Somehow, I've got to get through this.

What?

It's nothing you need to worry about.

It's the caterers.

They've put in the wrong order, but they've got plenty of recipes for pork, so...

They didn't get the beef?

Cherry, don't let this get to you.

I can't do this any more.

-Fine, we'll do it together.

-It shouldn't be this difficult. Maybe we shouldn't get married!

-Shhh. Come on, you don't mean that.

-I do!

-We'll drop the scent.

-We've paid for it!

-It doesn't matter.

-We'll let go of the beef.

-Mum hates pork!

She'll still get fed anyway, so... I'm sure she wants us to be happy, don't you?

-Imogen's hair? You've seen that?

-It doesn't matter either.

-It does.

It all matters. This is a complete disaster!

Oh, OK. Right, you know what?

This is a marriage, not a wedding.

I really don't care how it happens.

We could get married in a muddy field in the rain for all I care!

At the end of the day this is just about two people.

Yes? Just us.

I'm sorry.

I'm being really self-absorbed, aren't I?

You're my one in six billion.

You're mine.

He, he...

It's not your fault.

I feel sick.

-Do you want the bowl?

-I just want to go home.

They'll let you go home when they're sure that junk's out your system.

Does Emma know yet?

I've left a message with her to call me.

I should go!

No, you should wait!

She'll understand.

She won't.

Please don't tell her. It's humiliating enough.

What was I thinking?

You were under the influence.

Not for all of it.

I put on that skirt and then...

You don't think I'm...

What?

You know.

Well, have you ever thought you might be?

Then you're not.

Probably.

I never thought I could be like that, you know?

And get so carried away.

Maybe, you just wanted to enjoy yourself?

It's like my whole life I've been waiting for something to happen.

Emma's thing is to go to South America.

She's always known that.

But me, I...

I've been hoping for something else to come up. Something I can do.

You mean, like, wearing a skirt?

No! Ha-ha! Well, maybe.

You should try it some time. It's kind of freeing.

I don't think so!

How am I going to tell Emma?

You've got to be honest with her.

I never wanted to hurt her.

No, that's a lie.

I just didn't want to lose her!

Oh! Oh...

I'll get the bowl.

Night.

Good night.

Have a good night.

I shall do my best.

It was nice seeing you and Marina together again,

even if it was only for work reasons.

She still cares for you.

I know I shouldn't be saying this, but I think you should know.

There's still hope!

See you tomorrow.

Hey!

Finally! Sam, I left a message...

I'm fine, it just took me a while to sober up.

I'm really sorry.

No, I am.

I'm going to go to Venezuela.

You should.

You still going to work in the bar?

No. I'm going to try something new.

There you go.

Thank you. Have a good evening.

Just having a glass of wine in front of the telly.

There's a concert on BBC 4.

Prokofiev. I've already got it marked.

I'll raise a glass to you.

As I will you.

-Good night, Heston.

-Good night.

I need to see someone. My AF is back.

Please, come. Come and sit.

They're back. I told you they would be.

-They won't be believe me.

-I saw something.

Something awesome.

It was God himself.

It was an alien.

They're back. The demons are back.

What happened exactly?

Nothing! Nothing!

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