The Real Thing Doctors

-Think it'll get crumpled if I fold it?

-Probably.

Think there'll be an iron in the hotel room?

How should I know?

-My dad always said roll them up.

-Roll it?

I don't know, then. Do what you want.

MOTORBIKE ENGINE REVS OUTSIDE

MUSIC: "Ain't Nobody" by Chaka Khan

# I've been waitin' for you It's been so long

# I knew just what I would do When I heard your song

# It filled my heart with your bliss Gave me freedom

# You knew I could not resist I needed someone. #

Hopefully, their English is better than my Swiss.

French, then, whatever.

Bonjour, that's about as far as it goes.

HE LAUGHS

OK, Sarah. I'll be in the office in half an hour.

All right?

Yeah.

-Passport!

-Box in our bedroom.

Dale?

You couldn't come with me, could you?

The doctor thought you were fine, didn't she?

Not today, love. I can't.

-Mand, have you seen the time?

-Yeah.

I'll phone the surgery and say that you've...

Ah-ah... And relax.

I've got the morning off!

Oh!

Well!

Breakfast. We have got eggs. We've got bacon.

We've got the whole morning!

We could go out if you like?

Where?

Erm, mooch round the shops?

OK.

-Would you fancy that?

-Actually, I would love it.

Great!

I've brought you a cup of...

Thank you!

I just...

Oh, I was just...

They're lovely.

I know.

Do you think they're real?

Definitely. He obviously wanted you to say yes.

It's a nice, simple wedding band.

It fits.

Things must be going well if you're thinking of wearing them again?

No! I was... I was...

I was...

We're nowhere near that. We're just dating.

At least, I think we are. Had a bit of a row on Friday.

Ah. Serious?

Oh, I don't know. Just silly, I don't know.

So that's the wedding one,

that's the engagement one. What's that one?

Eternity.

Sam bought me one just before the accident...ironically.

No!

Oh, that's a shame

because even though it reminds you of him, it must remind you of...

I should wear it.

Sorry.

I, I...

I... Oh.

Come on, where's that Cartier watch?!

-Optimistic!

-That's me.

What about this? Think it suits me?

THEY LAUGH

Oh, that is nice!

That is really nice, actually.

Erm, excuse me, can I just pay for this bracelet, please?

Oh, thank you.

-For me, seriously?

-Yeah.

You know, this is really lovely.

Me and you, we're not hurting anyone.

-I...

-SHE SIGHS

I don't even know why I thought there would be a problem.

It wasn't just you, though, was it?

Well, I'm never listening to Kevin, if that's what you mean!

Excuse me...

Would you mind just..?

BOTH: Cheese!

So, what can I do for you, today?

Well, I'm waiting for my results. I thought I saw blood in the toilet.

Yes, we ruled out haemorrhoids, we've sent stool samples,

-and we're waiting for the blood test results.

-Yeah.

It's all in hand.

I did say that it would take three days, minimum.

I'm sorry, it's just that the waiting's really hard.

Do try not to worry.

I know, but I'm still feeling all the symptoms.

Actually, they're getting worse.

My stomach, diarrhoea, the pain down the left-hand side.

The pain, is it the same as before?

You know, it is surprising what can be caused by psychosomatic...

I'm not making it up.

I know that after last time you must think that, but...

the night sweats... I'm still losing weight.

My jeans are hanging off me.

If you'd like to get on the scales?

Maybe try staying away from internet medical sites.

Honestly, I deliberately haven't looked.

Hmm. Well, yes, you have lost some more.

Look, you're welcome to call in the morning,

-to see if the results have come through.

-But...

Seriously, I think that if you stop worrying,

you will start to feel a lot better

because I really don't think there's much wrong with you.

OK?

-Something sad about second-hand books.

-Really?

I always think they've been cleared out of dead people's houses.

No! I'm always getting rid of them.

Let someone else have a go.

Ah, no way, look!

It's the first one in the series! You were looking for this!

Er. Wasn't me.

-Oh, no, it was...

-Must have been someone else.

Yeah. Exactly.

Hey, ready for a coffee?

Yeah!

I've got every comparable on the laptop.

I think that gives us an even stronger pitch.

-Well done.

-Yeah. Well, I need to get this one, don't I?

Yep. You do.

-What time do you want to leave for the airport?

-Relax.

-Sorry, yeah.

-You'll get used to this.

Get this one in the bag and there'll be plenty more to come.

Oh, what are you making?

Ginger biscuits.

I used to make them when we'd had a row.

Just a silly thing. I probably only did it the once.

After every argument,

Sam would say "Ginger Biscuits?" It would make us laugh.

That's really sweet.

-Are you OK now?

-Yeah.

I just can't believe that it's over a year since Sam died.

I didn't feel anything much on the day itself, the anniversary.

I'm sorry if I...

No, it was seeing your wedding ring that reminded me.

Of your wedding?

Oh, no. Reminded me of the fact that I never really wore mine.

Really?

I felt I was very self-assured. Sophisticated.

Sam said he didn't mind so...

..we had what you call an open relationship.

Oh.

Must have hurt him. I just wish we'd spent more time together.

Doctor? Sorry.

I'm really sorry, I need your help.

-Pardon?

-We both know I've got cancer.

-Hold on.

-All of my symptoms point to it.

And everybody knows that speed is the thing.

The longer it's left, the worse it is.

I've come in here. The only person with the authority to help me

-is you, and yet you don't seem bothered.

-Stop there.

Is there another doctor, then? One who could give a second opinion?

No!

No. I have given my considered medical opinion.

My mum died when she was 36.

What?

Exactly the same.

A pain here. Couldn't sleep, always hot, she got thin.

And the doctor sent her home.

"Don't worry," they said. "Stop worrying."

And it was too late.

Why didn't you tell me earlier?

The genetic element could be significant.

I didn't want to hear it.

Follow me.

Oh, they're a bit burnt. I always do that.

Sam used to say "It's a sign of your burning ambition, Em."

That must be nice.

Having a bloke that you can have in-jokes with.

It's just shared memories, really.

Sometimes, it's weird, but sometimes I just feel

so comfortable with him, like I've known him for ever.

But then he'll say something and expect me to know

what he's talking about, and I'm thinking, "Who are you?"

But you are still getting on with him, aren't you?

Yeah! He's nice. He's nice on a date.

Except when he's being grumpy about me talking about Jimmi.

Anyone can get on over steak and chips, can't they?

What?

'So the doctor's been onto the lab and they're rushing them

'through for us. Should be about one o'clock.'

Uh-huh.

And she said I could come in for them, which is

better than on the phone.

The phone would be OK, though, wouldn't it?

No, because...

..Dale, she said, from my symptoms,

she thinks there's a good chance it is cancer.

HE SIGHS Jude.

'It's what she said, Dale. I need you with me.'

Please...

Dale.

I'll meet you there.

Sarah? I've just got to pop out and deal with something.

-Won't be too long.

-We can't miss this flight, Dale.

Shall I put the kettle on again?

I should be in the garden, really. Tidying up. Oh, go on, then.

SHE LAUGHS

-Can I ask you a question?

-What?

Even after you've been married for a really long time,

do you still...you know?

What?

I don't know how to put it.

Oh, you mean, keep the flame alive?

Yeah! Exactly.

I can't imagine, after you've washed his pants for the millionth time...

Wiped his pee off the toilet seat.

Urgh, really? Heard all his boring jokes. Seen him pick his nose.

Oh, really?

-He thought I wasn't watching.

-Oh, dear.

But with Rob... Let me ask you a question.

Do you fancy him?

Because know it or not, you've been through a lot with that man.

And if you still fancy him...

it's got to be a good sign, hasn't it?

THEY LAUGH

PHONE RINGS

Hello?

'Sarah, Hi.'

Um, I'm at the doctors, Campus Surgery with Jude.

-She's not too well, so...

-How long's it going to take?

Shouldn't be long. Just waiting to see the doctor.

I'll pick you up. Stay where you are.

Sure. Sorry.

-Sarah's picking me up.

-What? When?

After we've seen the doctor! She's worried we'll miss the flight.

-KNOCK ON DOOR

-Come in.

Right, so, there's a short delay with the blood test results.

But we've got the faecal occult result back,

and that one is positive.

-Positive?

-Yes.

I told you! I told you!

I knew something was wrong.

Not necessarily. It is a very sensitive test.

Are you sure you followed the correct procedures?

-It's not rocket science.

-No red meat, cabbage, turnips.

I read the leaflet!

See? I've got cancer, Dale!

What are we going to do now?

Sam bought me this, shortly after he came out of hospital.

-Oh. Lovely.

-Not really, I think it's horrid.

Been meaning to chuck it out for ages, but I haven't got the heart.

It's funny, I never thought I'd be the kind of person

to hang on to things.

But I don't know,

maybe you realise you only get one real chance, one real connection.

Does that mean Rob's mine?

That's so much pressure. What if I can't do it?

-What if I don't feel it?

-You said you fancied him.

-I do.

And maybe I'll remember and fall back in love with him...

..but it's almost harder with him being there, waiting for me

to catch up.

I can't concentrate on my memories because he's in the way.

It can't be easy.

Like when I remembered going to that restaurant with Jimmi,

it felt so good.

It was scary, and it was really exciting.

And when I told Rob about it,

as soon as he realised it wasn't all about him, he didn't want to know!

Well, he's just desperate for you to remember something about him,

-when you were together.

-I know!

THEY LAUGH

Look at us!

Here I am, hanging on to some plant because all I've got are memories.

And there's you.

No memories.

But you have the man.

I know which I'd rather have.

So what's the next step? Now that we know.

Let's not jump the gun. The blood tests have come through.

Liver function, kidney function, fine.

Blood count normal.

In fact, pretty much perfect.

Well, that's some good news at least.

So where's the blood coming from?

You need to refer me for ultrasound, colonoscopy.

Yes, all of that will be done.

But I'm still not concerned.

According to the blood tests, you are basically well.

-What else can it be?

-Jude, don't forget, you do worry.

Dale!

It is true that all of your symptoms could be caused by worry.

-Except the blood!

-Except the blood.

Which is why I am prepared to send you for further tests.

What do I have to do to get taken seriously?

You are being taken very seriously.

As it stands, it appears you are losing blood.

That, coupled with your family history,

-is enough to cause concern...

-Family history?

Yes, I understand that Jude's mother died young after similar symptoms.

Jude's mum lives in Eastbourne.

With a cat.

I'm really sorry.

You lied?

But...the test?

I just brushed my teeth until they bled.

I read somewhere that that would trigger it.

Why?

Because...

I was so terrified of him going away. With his boss!

Just the two of them. I thought if I could get him

to stay this once, maybe they'd get someone else to do

the travelling and it would all disappear.

What?

You're not ill? You're actually well?

Well, clearly not.

That's a pretty extreme reaction to your husband going away on business.

He slept with someone.

Little family secret. Nobody knows except us.

And her. What was it?

Three weeks after Rose was born? Couldn't have picked a better time.

This is hardly the place.

I'm not sure I agree.

-Right, I've been thinking.

-No, Kevin. I don't want to hear it.

I know you don't, and that's kind of the point.

Freya is dead.

So any of this spoiling her memory or doing anything

she wouldn't want to do, none of that is real.

Freya's dead, and she's not coming back.

Something that is real - I had a really lovely morning

-with someone who cares about me.

-So you're happy?

-Yes.

-Replacing Freya with Lois.

Fine. I'm backing off.

Look, I'm really sorry but I've got to go.

Thanks a lot.

I came here because I thought you might be ill.

Jude's symptoms are real enough.

Nausea, diarrhoea, night sweats, weight loss.

As a doctor, I'd like to address the causes.

Me too.

A one-night stand. Drunken work do,

I don't know what happened.

I think you do.

It was just...weird.

The baby.

I think it's different for blokes.

You don't feel drawn in, not at the very start.

It's more like you're pushed out.

This...thing has arrived.

Thing?

I'm trying to explain. For you, I could see it

felt like the beginning of something.

If I'm really honest...

..for me it felt like the end.

You know, the end of us, as we were.

I was covered in baby sick!

It hurt to walk, getting no sleep, so tired I couldn't think.

I felt rubbish, I looked rubbish and it was the one time

when I needed you there for me. And you went off with someone!

Sorry.

And whatever magic little Rose brought us,

that night you threw it away.

No! You can't say that.

Please, Jude!

This is us!

We're more important. Rose is!

We've got to put it behind us.

How?

Talking is certainly a start.

MOBILE PINGS

It's Sarah. I've got to get to the airport.

Sorry.

Forgiven.

I miss him.

I bet there are loads of people who never find anybody.

I suppose.

Look at Al, Mrs Tembe. Even Daniel and Zara,

who knows what they feel about each other!

-That's a bit naughty, Karen.

-True, though!

I mean, I bet there aren't many people who get a soulmate?

"Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all."

Exactly.

I should remind myself of that.

Sorry.

No, everybody should have a wallow from time to time.

In fact, I've got a good idea. Come on, bring your tea.

Come on!

Why? Where are we going?

I have been looking forward to getting you home!

Me too.

So?

-Where is it?

-Where's what?

-The one of me and Freya.

-Relax.

I said, where?

I just put it in the drawer.

I thought you'd like it.

How dare you!

Why are you being like this?

This is practically all I have left!

Look! See! Freya!

Pictures of me and Freya.

You can't just come in and pretend it never happened!

See, me and Freya!

Is this what I'm doing, is it?

Is this all about her?

Why can't there be pictures of me, too? Don't I count?

It's not about that.

That's exactly what it's about. Don't lie!

I'm not lying!

Maybe I should just go!

You don't want me, do you?

You never did!

BABY MOBILE PLAYS TUNE

BABY GURGLES

It's my fault. I thought you were over her.

I thought you wanted a relationship. But fine, I'll pack my bags.

You are two different people!

Of course I want a relationship with you! But...

That doesn't mean I want to lose the memory of Freya.

Don't bother! I'm just a cheap replacement.

No, you are so different.

That's the thing that people don't understand.

-You are so different from your sister.

-Oh, yeah!

So different from Freya because Freya was so funny,

Freya was so clever, Freya was so freaking fantastic!

No, that's not what I meant.

Look at her!

Look at her, always pushing me out of the way!

Look how she reeled people in, the drama queen.

The stupid, fat drama queen.

Well?

Freya could be a drama queen.

Yeah, but you want her more than me! What does that say?

I'm going.

No! Please don't.

And I'm sorry to have ever presumed to put a photo of us out!

At least I now know where I stand.

Lois, you're being ridiculous.

Yeah, ridiculous!

Ridiculous to think that you could have ever wanted me.

Please, stop!

MUSIC PLAYS ON TV

Lovely.

Chocolates?

Emergency stash.

Emergency?

I thought I was supposed to be looking after you.

Don't eat the coffee ones, then.

BABY COOS

MUSIC: "Unchained Melody" by The Righteous Brothers.

# And time goes by so slowly

# And time can do so much

# Are you still mine?

# I need your love

# I need your love

# God speed your love to me... #

I don't expect her to be Freya, but I can't bear this. I can't.

He's got a really bad temper.

I'd move, or you'll regret it.

Possibly.

-Mate, you walked straight into me!

-I'm not your mate.

And if you can't handle it, don't drink it.

Say that again.