The Beast Within Doctors

Have you got your key?

I need to get a washer for that tap. The dripping's like torture.

-I can do that.

-You know the size?

Look, I need you to get a few things. OK?

HE MOUTHS

OK.

-Ten pounds.

-Ten pounds.

And bring me back the change.

I'll see you later.

SHE BREATHES DEEPLY

PHONE RINGS

Oh.

Hayden.

Yes, perfectly fine, thank you.

For goodness sake, tell her she worries too much.

What?

But... Today?

Er...I can't.

Because it slipped my mind.

Could we postpone? Put him off?

SHE SIGHS

Oh. Yeah. What time is it?

Are you sure we can't...?

Yeah. All right. Thank you.

HE WHISTLES

-With Dr Granger?

-At half past.

OK. Do you want to take a seat? He won't be long.

You OK?

-Elaine?

-Oh, sorry. Sorry, I was miles away.

I was just asking if you were OK.

-You look a bit pink.

-Do I? Yes, I'm fine.

-No, I'm not. I've just had a call from my brother-in-law.

-Oh.

Not his fault, not this time.

-What's happened?

-Ages ago, he arranged a blind date for me with one of his colleagues.

-Oh.

-Lovely man, apparently.

-Very handsome.

-Apparently? You didn't go?

Well, that's the thing. It hasn't happened yet. I totally forgot.

-It's this lunchtime.

-What?

I know, exactly. I'm not sure I'm ready.

Well, have you got a chance to go home?

Not that you don't look gorgeous. You always look gorgeous.

No, I mean I'm not sure I'm ready for a date, dressed up or not.

Hang on a minute - it might be a good idea. Just what the doctor ordered.

-Do you think?

-Yeah. Absolutely.

-Get back out there.

-Back in the saddle.

I mean, remind yourself that not all blokes are...you know...

-Yeah, you never know, he might actually be nice.

-It seems like I don't have a choice.

Apparently he's old school. Doesn't do mobiles.

Oh, old school. Sounds like a proper knight in shining armour.

SHE SHIVERS

-Sounds like Heston.

-Oh, rather her than me.

Hey, I had a cousin once who went on a blind date with a bloke

-who cut her steak up for her then tried to feed it to her.

-Ugh, yuck.

-Well, fingers crossed. She might be lucky. He may be the man of her dreams.

-Hmm.

Or have two brain cells and look like Herman Munster.

FAINT YELPING

YELPING CONTINUES

Hello.

Hello!

Please take a seat.

So how did it go?

You understand what I'm saying? The filler was only ever a long shot.

But it does look better. Doesn't it?

-Look, with scarring of this kind the problem is...

-Maybe if I go back there...

I'm sorry, Angie.

Any more thoughts about what we spoke about last time?

The counselling?

I don't need to go yacking on about it. I just want it gone.

Well, if that's genuinely what you want then all I can recommend at this stage

-is that you reconsider your surgical options.

-No.

Talk to an expert. Find out what's possible.

I have to get back.

How's your brother?

Still no job.

Still living at the flat. Still broke.

Well, he's very lucky to have you.

I'm sorry, Dr Granger. I just don't want opening up.

Well, you know where I am.

If you were to change your mind about any of this, I have numbers.

OK? I hope things start to work out for you, Angie.

Bye.

Hey.

-Oh, Granger's as blind as a bat. You look lovely.

-Thank you.

-Now you take care.

-Mmm.

-Good luck.

Angie OK?

Did I do something?

Why would you ask that? Eh?

Why would you ask that, Bez?

When you never do anything.

Stop it.

What was it I needed you to get? Can you even remember?

-I was...

-Three things.

I asked you to go shopping for three things.

SHE SIGHS It doesn't matter.

Forget it. It's OK.

I'll go.

No-one minds, you know.

You're still beautiful.

Give me the money.

Where's the rest?

Today, this afternoon, you go down the Jobcentre. Do you understand me?

And you get yourself a job,

-anything, by the end of the day.

-OK.

The end of the day, or you're out! You're out on your own.

Oh, I think I'm over there.

-Gregory?

-Ah. Elaine?

Greg. Please.

Delighted to meet you.

Oh, Fred. You're going to get us into more trouble.

Stay there. Stay there, Fred.

-FRED WHIMPERS

-Sssh. Sssh.

Come here. Come with me.

So there she is, having deliberately chosen the one who claimed to be 65 and balding

and he turned out to be about 15.

-She ended up advising him on his acne.

-Oh!

-Ah. It's a terrifying business.

-Oh, you're telling me.

I mean, you must have been worried, Hayden recommending me.

I suppose he told you about...

He may have mentioned something.

Don't worry. I don't really look at the papers.

-Are you ready to order?

-Oh, yes. I'll have the Dover sole, please.

Mm. Nice choice. Make that two. And to drink?

I better be careful. A small glass of white wine, please.

-The same.

-Thank you.

Oh, very good.

SHE CHUCKLES

Oh, blind date - white stick.

-Very nice.

-Elaine, I...

I suppose Hayden put you up to that one?

I'm so sorry.

I assumed he would have mentioned it.

BARKING

-GROWLING

-Ow!

BARKING

Ow!

I just can't believe he wouldn't mention it. I could throttle him.

-I'm so sorry, Greg, really.

-Please. It's not a problem.

If I'm being honest, I quite like it when people don't notice. It's rather fun.

-Least one of us is having a good time.

-A-ha!

At last. Now this is shaping up to be more like a proper blind date, wouldn't you say?

To be honest, I'm really quite relieved.

-Relieved?

-Well, the sunglasses in a restaurant?

Ah, I see.

You're relieved I'm blind rather than...

psychotic.

HE LAUGHS

You know, I can almost see your expression.

Marvellous. Right, if you'll excuse me,

I must pop to the bathroom before the advent of the sole.

-Of course. Allow me.

-Oh!

I've been house-trained for a while now. I think I'll manage.

Dr Granger!

I need to see Dr Granger!

We're closed.

Four o'clock.

What the...?

Bez. Let him in, Karen.

Bez, what is it? What's wrong?

Come through.

That's it, nice and slow. Breathe in.

And out.

-It's bad, isn't it?

-You'll live.

So are you going to tell me what happened?

Hmm?

BARKING

Hello.

He bit me, Dr Granger.

Did he now? Here.

Was he in the bag when it happened?

Well, I'm not surprised. How would you feel trapped in a bag? He probably just panicked.

I think we should put this on.

So he just panicked cos he felt trapped?

Yep. Now, I need you to take him outside the front door and tie him up, OK?

-Then come straight back in.

-OK.

SHE SNIFFS

PHONE RINGS

You lucky devil. I'm consumed by jealousy.

I mean, two days and a night on a tiny little coach

stopping off at the most dreadful dives along the way,

but, my goodness, was it worth it. I mean for the...

for the sunset over Pyramid Khufu alone.

Honestly, somehow you really must get a chance to see...

SHE SIGHS

Oh, what is wrong with me today?

Well, you're the expert, doctor. But my diagnosis?

Faux pas syndrome.

It's terribly entertaining.

Oh, here.

Oh, God, my fault.

Oh. What a klutz. Excuse me.

It's all right.

-Oh, thank you.

-I can manage, really.

Actually, could we have a cloth, please?

-Er...Elaine...

-And another glass of wine.

-Elaine. Please!

-Elaine, I...

-Oh!

BARKING

RATTLES DOORS

All right! Can you stop doing that?

OK. OK. It's OK.

Why don't we all go through to my room for a minute, OK? This way.

-He was bitten.

-Bitten?

-By a dog.

-The one outside. Did you see him?

He's a puppy, really. Isn't he, Dr Granger?

He's not a dog.

He's only young. Definitely.

He's very silly.

It's just a nick.

But there were blood though, weren't there?

-And Dr Granger gave me this.

-It's antibiotics. It's a precaution. His tetanus is up to date.

How...did you get bitten?

-He's not a bad dog, Ange. He's a good dog.

-The dog was in his bag.

Cos he's mine. I found him.

You found him? Where?

At the lake.

In the park?

-I was skimming.

-I thought I told you to go to the Jobcentre.

-Before that. While you were here.

-When you were supposed to be shopping?

You brought it in the flat, didn't you? You had a dog in my flat?

-It's not just a dog, Ange. It's Fred.

-When are you ever going to learn?

-He were on his own. He were in a sack!

-When are you ever going to grow up and see past yourself?

It's not like that. He's friendly.

-You'd want to keep him if you...

-You selfish, selfish little boy. Don't you get it?

"You're still beautiful."

Why can't you see what you've done?

My whole life, everything - he's destroyed everything.

It weren't my fault, Ange.

You were teasing it. Gran said so. Everybody said so.

-It weren't just me. There were both of us.

-I was four years old.

-Maybe Gran's dog...

-Your baby sister, and you never protected me.

-Maybe it felt trapped.

-You've never once in your whole life protected me.

-It just panicked.

-No. No, that's not what happened.

It didn't feel trapped. It didn't panic. You teased it.

It thought it was a game, and it attacked the nearest thing.

Just like that one out there.

Er... Well, I had a lovely time. Thank you.

So did I. Very eventful.

Greg... Maybe we could try this again sometime?

I really did have fun. And you seem like a very nice person.

But...

But I'm big enough and ugly enough to cope without help.

Elaine, what I'm looking for is a girlfriend. Not a carer.

Besides, I get the distinct impression

there's someone that needs looking after more than I do right now.

Sorry to be brutal. I tend to think that honesty is best.

Yes. Yes, it is. Thank you.

It's been a pleasure.

Why do you think he were in there?

Did it even occur to you to wonder why the dog was in the sack?

-So that I'd find him.

-No. What do you think this is, a fairy tale?

It bit you.

It was in the sack because it bites people.

I don't know what you mean.

Oh, yes, you do. Don't play stupid with me.

-You can't always make the rules.

-They're not my rules!

-I found him.

He was there because he's dangerous.

-They wanted me to find him.

-Who did?

-He's my dog and I'm keeping him.

-He was in there because someone didn't have the guts to do what they should have.

-He were a present.

No, he wasn't.

I love him. And you can't stop me.

He was in there because someone was going to drown him.

And that's what should have happened. He should have been drowned.

It's OK. It's all right.

Bez?

'It's my job to look after him.'

Last thing Mum said to me. Not "goodbye", not, "I love you."

-Just, "Look after your brother."

-What about your dad?

He left. Years ago.

Couldn't stand to look at me.

You know, you've every right to feel the way that you do.

You don't know how I feel.

-If you did, you'd hate me.

-Course I wouldn't hate you.

You'd think I was evil.

Just sometimes he gets this look and I think,

"You're doing it on purpose, aren't you? You're putting it on."

See?

But you know that he's not.

It's not fair.

No.

-He'll be all right, won't he?

-He's a grown man.

I shouldn't have shouted at him, said all that stuff about killing it.

He'd do anything for me, you know.

Anything.

Come on, Bez. Where are you?

HE SOBS

Bez? Stay there!

Dr Granger, he's my brother. Stay there!

What?

Stay there.

Bez! Bez, stop, it's me. It's Ange. Please, Bez.

It's not your fault, darling. None of this is your fault.

Bez...

What I said before.... I didn't mean you to...

-I never wanted for you to get bitten, Ange.

-I know.

-Darling, I know.

-I never wanted for that to happen.

We were just playing. But it's OK.

Don't, Ange, I've sorted it.

-It's OK.

-No.

We were both so young and no-one told us what to do.

I'm so sorry, Bez. I'm so sorry.

GROWLING

You need to take it out, Bez.

You need to take it out.

For me.

GROWLING

GROWLING STOPS

Sometimes I get so angry, and I don't even know who with.

Sshh, ssshh. It's OK.

It's OK.

It's OK, Ange. Sssh.

-SHE SOBS

-Sssh.

It's not really my area of expertise,

but he looks remarkably healthy to me.

-He's going to need love, obviously. And a warm bed.

-One thing at a time.

-Thanks, Dr Granger.

-OK.

Look, Fred,

your new home.

Well, I better be getting back.

Those numbers...

I don't mind if you want to give them to me sometime.

Just don't be expecting miracles, OK?

How did it go?

Yeah, fine.

Oh, here she is. Right, come on. Information, please.

-Lunchtime. Blind date.

-Ooh.

-Karen! Does the world have to know?

-He won't say anything.

Well done, you.

-Don't patronise me, please.

-It went well then?

Yes, thank you, it did. It was fine. Absolutely fine. If you'll excuse me.

I imagine that you're a real antique collector, Cherry.

-Dr Cassidy.

-Where...?

How long have you been here?

-What did you pay for the piece?

-£150.

Did you really? Did you? Really?

More revs, more revs.

-No! Handbrake, clutch, neutral.

-Dad!

Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd

E-mail [email protected]