Last Tango Doctors

THUMPING

PHONE RINGS

Yes, hello? Yes, speaking.

I've paid the electricity.

Yesterday. I suggest you check your system again, then.

Aww, not still hungry, are you?

-He loves his mummy.

-His mummy loves him.

But she's prepared to give you up to a nanny.

Daddy isn't prepared to give up his career to look after you every day

-but he thinks that Mummy should.

-He needs his mother.

His mother needs to work because his mother is not ONLY a mother,

but a capable woman who can manage...

-PHONE RINGS

-..looking after a child AND career, like millions of others do!

-Hello?

-You'll be pleased to have someone to play with, won't you?

And we'll find you a nanny with a good sense of humour

and no dirty habits. You're going to have a wonderful time.

Well, that's just great. They've double-booked the venue.

-Then, you'll have to find somewhere else.

-When?

It's this afternoon! I've got a paperwork morning but I said I'd see a patient and I can't put her off.

-I'll do it.

-No.

-Why not? Who is it?

-Ruby Jacobs.

-She's been my patient for nearly three years.

-You've got your hands full here. I can manage.

Don't be silly. You've got your Botox promotional thing to sort out. I can do it all.

No.

DOOR OPENS, BELL TINGS

We're closed. Can't you see the sign?

Ellie.

Daniel.

-You've changed.

-I hope so. It's been four years!

-How are you?

-Fine, thanks.

Great.

Can I have a coffee?

No.

-The machine's not warmed up yet.

-Oh.

-Don't look at me like that!

-Like what?

You know.

I didn't think I'd see you again.

I don't, er, touch that stuff any more.

-None of it.

-Must be hard.

My life's...

What's her name?

Zara. And I go to Gamblers Anonymous now.

Oh! I tried that. It was irritating.

How did you manage it?

It's a mug's game, Daniel. I'm not a mug.

No.

Has that machine warmed up yet?

Er, the machine is broken. I'm getting it fixed later.

That night...

I waited for you in the hotel and you didn't come back.

-You knew that I was on the run.

-Not from me.

I'm sorry.

What do you want, Daniel?

Um... I came in here because I need a venue for a marketing event

this afternoon. I think this place would be perfect.

As would you.

-You used to be in events, didn't you?

-Was.

It's well paid. We could help each other out.

I'm not a party girl any more.

You don't want to earn two-and-a-half grand?

Goodbye, Daniel.

Good morning.

Oh, sorry! What can I do for you?

Isn't he lovely!

I wish I could have given you better news. I'm sorry.

It's OK, dear.

We'll do everything to make you as comfortable as possible.

-You have family, don't you?

-Two sons, yes.

And are they...?

Attentive? When it suits them.

Would you like a pear drop?

Thank you.

Mmm.

I can arrange for the Macmillan nurses to visit you at home.

Do you like the taste?

Yes. I'd forgotten about the very peculiar sweetness they have.

-I'll get morphine?

-Yes.

You won't feel any pain.

Oh! I wish I could leave you some, but it looks like we've had the last.

I shall just have to savour this one, then, won't I?

How long?

There are no absolutes,

but I would say between three to six months.

Next time I come, I'll have to bring you a whole bag of pear drops.

I'll look forward to it.

If you want my advice, dear,

always look for the beauty in life.

It's there. You just have to keep your eyes out for it.

I'll see you next time.

And don't forget those pear drops.

I don't want a new machine. I just want a new part.

60 quid?! For labour alone?!

You're ruining my life!

Are you all right?

Fine.

Hey...

who would pay that price for a handbag?!

Well, those ones... These ones are tacky,

but that one is a beautiful piece of equipment.

But I would want it diamond-encrusted for that price.

Exquisite, understated, perfectly finished design.

I want it.

But it's not very practical now, is it?

Now?

-Well, everything changes when you've had a baby, doesn't it?

-It doesn't have to, no.

Yeah, but it just does.

You have to give up certain things.

Are you saying that now I have a baby,

I'm not entitled to my own life, my own job or my own identity, being a mother?

-No, I didn't say that.

-Good. I am perfectly capable of doing two jobs

and carrying two bags.

See? These things aren't fixed. A hundred quid!

Yeah, it's your lucky day!

Give us another one, then. I'm on a roll.

Actually, um...

you know what? I'm going to quit while the going's good.

I don't want to get carried away.

You've got one left.

Thank God! Will you hold it for me till 1pm, please?

Well, what time CAN you hold it until?

OK, OK, I will be there.

We are going shopping, baby Joe.

Ooooh...

Brilliant.

That's great, thanks. Three o'clock, see you then. Bye-bye.

You're getting fixed! The man is coming to sort you out at three!

The holiday's over.

I'll have a latte, please.

I can offer you tea or...

-That machine's been on the blink for a while now, hasn't it?

-That machine is my business.

What business?

I'll have your rent next week.

Yeah, now, where have I heard that before?

-Everyone's struggling.

-And

-I

-don't want to.

Two grand, Ellie.

-Today.

-What?! No! You're not giving me a chance!

OK. You've got till one o'clock.

Every penny.

Or you can pack your bags and get out.

No!

No, no, no, no!

You said you would hold that bag for me until 11:15am.

Looks like I made it in the nick of time.

Sorry to disappoint you, but...

I'm not disappointed. I'm going to make a special lady very happy.

-Give his money back.

-I don't want my money back.

Choose another bag! That one is mine!

-Chill out, lady!

-Not until you let me have what is rightfully mine.

-Back off!

-I'm sorry.

I've had a very stressful morning.

Hormones, is it?

Look, I will give you more money than you have just paid for that bag.

-SHE SOBS

-Please?

Nice try, lady, but I've been around too long.

Why don't you buy yourself a piece of jewellery? Some nice sparkles.

You'll soon forget about the bag.

It always works for me.

I'll do your party.

You don't trust me.

So, um...

Zara...

is she beautiful?

Yeah, she's beautiful.

She's sharp, funny...

-kind.

-And she knows your history?

Yeah. She knows what's past is past.

Good.

You've come a long way, haven't you?

Not the wild-eyed fever-gripped Daniel I knew.

You must have really struggled to sort yourself out.

It was worth it.

So, um, what sort of people are coming to your event?

Potential Botox clients.

Seekers of eternal youth!

You could do a Hollywood theme.

Sunset Boulevard. Gin cocktails.

Feathers. Fake caviar.

You could put old pictures of Gloria Swanson on the walls.

-You should set up your own events company.

-Given the chance.

That is definitely the one.

Does suit my baby face.

Is it the right length for me, though?

It's perfect! It brings out the twinkle in your eye.

You think?

Price tag's a bit heavy, though.

For 24-carat gold, it's a bargain!

I tell you what, I'll buy the bag back off you,

and you could use the cash to pay for that.

It is so very beautiful.

So is my special lady.

This necklace... this necklace is timeless.

Girls come and go.

No.

Bye, baby!

I couldn't get two grand out of the account.

-You're a GP!

-You can have a grand up front, OK?

There goes the vintage gin. But I know a very nice rum that'll do the trick.

-I don't want my clients throwing up in the street.

-Just enough to stay the left side of merry.

-Are you sure you're going to be all right with all this?

-It gives me enough to play with.

To buy some nice stuff.

You know, you can come with me if you like.

-If you don't trust me.

-No, no. I'll see you at the cafe later.

MUSIC: "Moves Like Jagger" by Maroon 5

I thought we already said goodbye.

I bought this for you.

I don't accept presents from stalkers.

I'll give you the necklace.

You give me the bag. Everyone's satisfied.

I'll tell you what I'll do.

Look at it.

Touch it.

Lick it if you like.

Get it out of your system, lady.

This bag is not for sale. Not at any price.

PHONE RINGS

Yeah?

I can't pick up the kids from school, no.

I'm busy this afternoon.

Leave it out!

I told you before!

Because you don't listen.

You.

You're chatting rubbish.

Look, I don't need this now. I've got things to do.

'This is Daniel Granger. Please leave a message.'

Hello, Mike! Don't look so happy to see me.

I'm not staying long.

Place your bets.

No more bets, please.

2, black.

It's going to be all right, Mike.

It might just be...all right.

What do you reckon - same again?

Or, what, red for a change? Give us a sign.

PHONE RINGS

Hey, I've got a missed call from you.

'Daniel. I couldn't decide on the Jamaican or Barbadian rum.

'So I went for the Jamaican.'

Sounds like the party's already started.

'Oh...

'It's just some kids frolicking outside.'

Ellie, where are you? LINE CUTS OFF

BABY GURGLES

Can I have my bag back, please?

I beg your pardon?

Hand it over.

-I'll have to take it off you.

-Go ahead. I've got a witness.

Please don't take my handbag!

-But I'm winning!

-That's my money on the table.

I had never gambled in my life till I met you.

-What?

-Yeah. Too wrapped up in yourself.

-Then let me help you. Walk out with me now.

-I want to play on.

Just one more game. Just one more game.

-I'm going to win!

-Who are you trying to kid?

You've lost half my money!

Cash these in and walk out with me, you can still work for me this afternoon.

It's too late. I can't pay my rent,

-hence I'm going to be evicted.

-How much do you owe?

-Two-and-a-half grand.

Is that what you wanted the advance for?

-I didn't know what else to do.

-You could have told me!

You wouldn't have given me the money.

Ellie, did you ever intend to do my event?

I can still win this. There's still a chance. Not if we play the colours,

but if we play the numbers.

What were you going to say when I turned up with clients? Were you going to be there?

What am I going to tell Zara?

This was OUR money.

If we play the numbers, Daniel. You were good at that,

when you concentrated.

We could build a strategy. Come on, we can do this.

Get me a drink, would you?

BABY GURGLES

What?

Mummy deserves it.

I lost.

Well, you're out of practice. Try again.

It's gone.

-What, all of it?

-All of it.

We were going to build a strategy, not blow it in one.

No, you can't walk away! You've just lost my rent. Where are you going?!

Daniel! You can't just walk away. I'm going to be evicted.

-I need more cash, OK?

-You said you couldn't get any more cash.

I can get some from the surgery. I need to win it back, for Zara and the baby.

I didn't know you had a baby.

Yeah. He's two weeks old.

What? No, Daniel, don't.

-It's fine, it's fine. It's just a small amount.

-I can't believe I got you into this.

You cannot steal money from the surgery account. You'll lose your job.

What would Zara tell you to do? What would she say to you now?

And the baby...

Daniel, what are you doing?

Peaceable re-entry, Ellie. I've changed the locks.

-It might not be so peaceable if...

-Whoa! Have you got my money?

I've got an event today.

Not in here, you haven't.

I'm Daniel Granger. I'm a GP. I've hired this venue for an event this afternoon.

You've been had.

Daniel Granger?

You were in the press a while back, weren't you?

-Weren't you arrested for kidnapping your own child?

-The press owe me an apology or two, yes.

There's no smoke without fire.

I think they might like the one about the landlord

who evicts his young tenant on the eve of her lucrative career in events.

I look forward to reading it.

Especially as she's offering him more than a quarter of what she owes him.

-That'll do for a start.

-Can you let us in first?

-Give me two grand and I will.

-My books and my clothes and everything are in there!

-You live here?

-Yeah, in the flat upstairs.

-You didn't tell me that.

-You didn't ask.

-So your lease isn't solely commercial, then?

-No.

OK, well, first of all you're going to need an eviction letter followed by a court order.

If you don't allow Ellie re-entry, I'll call the police

and act as a witness for an unlawful eviction.

I thought you were a doctor. Not a lawyer.

I'm full of surprises, me. Come on.

Put the keys down and he'll give you the money.

If I don't get everything you owe me by tomorrow,

I'll start legal proceedings.

Where did you get it?

I didn't play it. Never kid a kidder.

You!

Now, look, you've got £100 left. If you make it work this afternoon

you'll get the rest that you need to pay your rent tomorrow.

-Pay the coffee engineer.

-OK.

You know what, I've got a crate of red wine and some crisps.

Think we might need to change the theme.

-Is Daniel around?

-No, he popped out a while ago.

There she is!

My lovely doctor!

Mrs Jacobs! How nice to see you!

Look at your little baby. Aww! He is beautiful.

Dr Carmichael, this is my baby, came to visit.

He gave me a lift here so I could bring these for you.

Thank you! That was very kind of you.

Anything for my special lady.

That bag...

it looks like the one I saw in that magazine a couple of weeks ago.

-Isn't it, Andy?

-It's the same one.

You remember it?

Very clearly.

He told me I was too old for it, that it was meant for the youth.

Good taste must run in the family.

That's a very nice chain you're wearing, Andy.

I'll sell it to you if you like.

No. You deserve it.

Mrs Jacobs,

Andy has been playing a little game with you.

Your considerate son popped in to see me earlier

to ask for some fashion advice.

I said I was going into town anyway, and so I would oblige. And...

This is for you.

You might not be youth, Mum,

but it'll still look good on you.

Oh!

They seem to like the tango theme.

Yep. I never thought I'd see Mrs Henderson with a rose in her mouth!

-She asked me to do her daughter's birthday next week.

-Great! You'd better pay your rent, then.

Oh, I will.

-I might even go to your irritating GA meetings too.

-Good.

Yeah?

Can we cut in?

Yeah! I was just keeping him warmed up for you.

Would you? Thank you.

Good event. Well done.

I'm sure if they could move their faces, they'd all look very happy!

It's all gone very well. How are you?

How was your day with Mummy? You're going to miss her, aren't you?

Mummy is calling a ceasefire for the afternoon.

Great! And how was your morning?

Absolutely fine. We managed to do it all.

Mrs Jacobs?

So sad.

Really makes you think.

I had forgotten

what a beautiful dancer you are.

And the night is still so very young.

Hey, little man.

Heston's got the trots.

Look me in the eye and deny it.

Stuffed turkey roll? All I need!

Are you compatible in the bedroom department?

There's no complaints from me!

I take the reputation of the practice seriously

even if YOU don't.

You're covered in poop! How did that happen?!

-Isn't this about compromise?

-I don't do compromise.

Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd