Wanton Desire Doctors

See ya!

Oi!

# Woke up this morning feeling fine

# I've got something special on my mind

# Last night I met a new girl in the neighbourhood

# Oh, yeah

# Something tells me I'm into something good

# Something tells me I'm into something... #

That was a stellar right hook. Where did you learn that?

-You're lucky you're still standing, mate.

-OK, pack it in.

I sympathise, Officer. It was easy to get the wrong end of the stick.

Wrong end of what stick? You coming out of my girlfriend's place at nine in the ruddy morning?

So, it was your girlfriend - the one in the boxer shorts?

Just to clarify. The boxers weren't mine.

I'm a congenital Y-front guy.

Are you taking the mick?!

-Hey, hey, hey! Pack it in!

-Listen, nothing happened.

I got totally blotto at the pub round the corner,

your lady-friend took pity on a gentleman in distress

and offered me a couch to sleep on. End of story.

I'll rip your head off. No joke.

That's your last warning, stop it!

What've I missed?

-This one's for you.

-Dr Jimmi Clay.

Pete "Pistol" Power.

And this one needs booking in.

Nah, just let him go.

-What?

-Pressing charges really isn't my scene.

Put it down to an unfortunate misunderstanding.

Right, Doc. After you.

Keep your head turned to the right for me. That's it.

-Ooh.

-Sorry.

Make sure you do a good job.

Ah!

I've got to look dialled tonight.

Why's that?

I've got a date with a couple of hundred screaming women.

Wanton Desire's rocking this town.

You've lost me.

It's my band. Wanton Desire.

Never heard of "She-Wolf Woman"?

# She-wolf woman

# She-wolf woman

# She's scary as hell

# Can you hear her yell? #

Got into the Top 30, that did.

No, sorry, I... When was the single released?

'69.

Bit before my time.

I guess so.

I'm the only original band member left.

Full of young guys like you now.

I sing all our vintage stuff, some covers.

Right, just keep your head turned to the right.

Where did you say the gig was? Letherbridge?

Ferret and Firkin.

Yeah, well, our aesthetic was way ahead of its time.

Then The Stones ripped us off.

Still, there are plenty of diehards around.

Yes!

# ..All those who come

# To San Francisco

# Be sure to wear

# Some flowers in your hair... #

Oh...

Sorry.

It's not you, my head's killing me.

It was a serious session last night, I can tell you.

Argh.

He gave you a real beating.

Yeah, well, if I was 30 years younger, I'd have had him.

But, you know, fair dos, I had it coming.

Why's that?

I WAS in bed with his girlfriend.

Yes, still enjoy the rock band benefits.

Can't help myself.

Never settled down, then?

Wasn't really me.

You married?

Yeah. Best thing I ever did.

I bet you had your own Jack the Lad phase, though, didn't you?

-I found it pretty empty in the end.

-Yeah, sure you did!

I'm not saying it wasn't fun while it lasted!

Come off it - once a roving eye, always a roving eye.

Not any more.

Leopards don't change their spots.

Well, I got lucky - found the right woman.

Good for you.

Came close to it once, marriage.

She was a good woman. Loyal.

Yeah...

She dodged the bullet.

The Rookery, Farndale Road, please.

Yes, I've got you down.

Thanks, Katie. I look forward to seeing you at eight. Bye.

PHONE RINGS

Hello? Yes, you've got the right number.

# Trailer for sale or rent

# Rooms to let, 50 cents

# No phone, no pool, no pets

# I ain't got no cigarettes

# Ah, but two hours of pushin' broom

# Buys an eight by twelve four-bit room

# I'm a man of means by no means

# King of the road... #

Hello?

Get out!

Get out of my house!

Melissa, it's me! Pete!

Pete!

So, are you going to explain?

Yeah, well, the back door was open...

No, I mean why are you here?

Well, I thought I'd pop round and see you.

SHE LAUGHS

What?

You decided to break into my house just to say hello?

Um, yeah.

You haven't changed.

Course not.

So... I'm here on tour.

I know.

You do?

You didn't think I would?

Actually, I was thinking about coming to see your show tonight,

but it's David's retirement party.

David?

Yes. That's David.

Oh, right. Your...?

My husband. Yes.

Looks a decent bloke.

He is.

He better treat you well.

Oh, he does. Don't worry.

He's a very kind man, doting.

Oh, good.

So, you're, um...happy, yeah?

Yes.

Yes, of course.

PHONE BEEPS

How about now?

Why didn't you just come over?

I didn't want to hijack your study period if you were busy.

For future reference, you can hijack my study periods whenever you like,

especially when it comes to 17th-century metaphysical poetry.

Yes, it's probably a bit much.

No, no! I'm not used to being bought flowers, that's all.

It's really sweet of you.

What are you doing for the next couple of hours?

-Not much.

-Do you fancy swapping a coffee for a glass of Cabernet?

What do you mean?

I was thinking French cuisine?

Le Champignon?

Um, not exactly. I was meaning the Icon.

They're doing a special French theme today.

Great!

Oh... Maybe I should change out of these?

You look perfect.

And you thought you were turning into the driveway of that B&B, and it was a field!

Any time you navigated, it always ended in a disaster.

Now, that's not fair! It was five in the morning!

Anyway, I thought the Mini was cosy.

Yes.

A beautiful sunrise, too.

Do you remember what you said to me?

Yeah.

Did you mean it?

Oh, it's David.

Right. Well, I guess I better skedaddle.

What? No, no! You should stay.

David would love to meet you. He's a big fan.

No, it would be awkward for you. For him, too.

No, no. Please stay.

-You've made a good life for yourself - I don't want to muck it up.

-Pete!

Sorry, I can't.

I've got to go.

Bye, Pete.

Bye.

He can do Tuesday at 11.

That'll be fine.

That's working, Mr Fahid, 11 o'clock.

OK, I'll see you then. Bye.

Dun-ah!

Wow! You are rocking that headband, girl.

Twiggy, eat your heart out.

Has Hallowe'en come early this year?

Mr Kristensen?

Ignore him. You look great.

He's right - I look ridiculous.

I'm too old to wear this stuff.

Nonsense!

Why are you wearing it?

The gig tonight!

Of course!

Yes, well, you'll look the part.

You mean the part of a middle-aged woman trying to regain her youth?

No!

In fact, you've inspired us, hasn't she, Karen?

Definitely.

# Knock, knock, knockin' on heaven's door... #

# Knock, knock, knockin' on heaven's door. #

Ok, Pistol, let's get you down from there.

# Don't stop me now I'm having such a good time

# I'm having a ball!

# Don't stop me now. #

Get yourself down and look sharp about it.

# You can't always get what you want. #

Right, I've had enough.

# I've had enough!

# I can't put up with it any more

# No, no, no, no, no. #

Stage dive!

No, no, no!

Arghhhh!

I've got to admit, stage-diving into a crowd of three wasn't my best idea.

Yep. Do you often drink like this in the middle of the day?

I get nervous before a gig. It helps me relax.

How much do you drink a week?

I don't keep track.

Mind if I check your torso?

Ooh!

Probably a bruise.

Yeah, well, there's no bruise there.

Pain in that area can sometimes indicate a liver problem.

It's better if you're straight with me.

I know I have a liver issue. My doctor in London is on it, OK?

I've had tests. I'm waiting for the results.

In my opinion, you should cancel the gig.

-What?

-You're not up to it.

No way! This is the last night of the tour.

I'm thinking about your health. It should be important to you too.

Look, I can't let the fans down.

All I've got to do is make it through tonight, right?

After that, well, I'm actually thinking about calling it quits.

I mean it. Look...

A little place I have down in Devon.

-Nice.

-Had this dream for years about retiring down there.

Building a recording studio, doing a bit of producing,

enjoying the sea air, taking it a little easier.

So, you see, I'm not so crazy after all.

But I have to perform tonight.

That's how it is.

Try and make it down there.

Thanks, but I'm working late.

I'll leave your name at the door.

Thank you.

Listen, try and stay off the alcohol.

It's a bit like asking a squirrel to give up nuts,

but I'll try.

Pete here.

Oh, hello.

You have?

OK.

So, what's the situation?

Right.

Right.

I see.

OK, thanks.

What was that dessert called again?

Tartelettes aux framboises a la creme de mascarpone.

All that for a jam tart.

Well, everything sounds better in French.

Particularly after you've had a few glasses of wine.

Well, thank you for letting me finish the "tarte aux framboises".

That shows you really care!

Well, I do...care.

I've had a great time.

Me too.

So, er...

what are you doing tonight?

No plans. Why?

How does a night in a swanky getaway sound?

A hotel?

No, it's much better than that. A friend's pad, this huge mansion.

He said I can stay there any time.

We'll have the run of the place.

What do you say?

Yeah... OK.

Quite a turn-out!

I am so sorry!

They were huge in the '60s, I promise you!

No apology required.

But I'm the one that dragged you here.

Who cares about numbers? Let's get a drink.

Or a few bottles.

That's the idea! It might not be Wembley, but it'll be bustin'!

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Thanks for showing up, you guys!

Love you all.

Love you too!

Shake those hips!

One, two, three, four!

MUSIC INTRO STARTS

# Do you love me?

# Do you love me?

# Do you love me?

# Do you love me?

# Do you love me?

# Do you love me?

# Now that I can dance

# Watch me now!

# Work, work

# Oh, work it all, baby

# Work, work

# Well, you're drivin' me crazy

# Work, work

-# With a little bit of soul now

-Work

# Well, I can mash potato

# I can mash potato... #

Pete Perkin is checking you out!

Who?

Pete Perkin!

Pete Power!

Whatever!

He's checking you out!

Still got it, Julia!

Show him your moves!

# Do you love me?

# Do you love me?

# Do you love me... #

Thanks.

See ya.

You guys have been awesome. We're going to take a short break! Be back in a mo!

CHEERING

Go on, Julia.

Come on! Go!

Go on!

We rocked out, right?

Definitely.

I can't tell you how long I've waited to meet you!

Do I feel like getting wasted or what?

How about you?

I was just going to say how fantastic...

You don't need to answer that.

You look great, by the way.

Well, thank you very much.

I thought we could start with good old wild sex.

Pardon?

-You ever had that?

-Not recently.

You don't know what you're missing.

Just pulling your plonker! It's a cocktail.

-Oh!

-But, actually, you should try it,

and I'm not talking about the cocktail.

Anyway, sex aside, you look like a cocktail kind of lady -

wine's for fuddy-duddies.

So, what would you like?

-Wine, actually.

-Sorry... What did you say you wanted?

Do you know what? I'm actually going to sit this one out.

What?

Yeah, I've got to get back to my friends. Thank you.

Nice to meet you.

DOORBELL RINGS

Katie and Sam?

-Hi.

-Hi.

Right.

Well, your room is upstairs, second on the right.

Cheers.

Just give me a shout if you need anything...

Hi!

I hoped I'd catch you.

Isn't it David's retirement?

I slipped away.

I don't have long.

Well, it's great to see you.

You look beautiful.

Thank you.

A Singapore Sling for the lady, with an extra shot of gin.

Well remembered!

Of course. You're still in time for the second half of the gig.

Actually, I...came to talk.

Well, I can do that too.

Mel, what's up?

David's a good man.

Yeah, I know.

-You said.

-But...

You and me, Pete...

We were something, weren't we?

That's just it.

I love David, I do...

but I'm not in love with him.

Do you understand?

Mel, where are you going with this?

I want to feel how I used to, Pete.

I want to feel something, but...

you...

Well, we...

SHE SIGHS

This must all sound so crazy, but I thought that...

Thought what?

This is our last chance, Pete.

Mel...

What?

Look at me, I'm a walking disaster!

Don't say that.

I'm still knocking this stuff back.

-I don't care.

-Mel!

You're much better without me.

We had big plans. Remember that cottage we talked about by the sea?

No...

No, sorry, babes, I don't.

It was in Devon. You swore you were going to buy it one day.

I don't remember.

It was our dream, Pete.

Yes, a dream...

but it's too late now.

No, it isn't.

Remember what you said that dawn after we'd slept in the Mini?

Mel, we were stupid kids back then.

We didn't have a clue what we were saying, especially me.

Do yourself a favour,

go back to David.

He's what you need.

I need you, Pete.

You.

Mel...

MUSIC STARTS

Mel, I've...

I've got to get back.

# She-wolf woman

# She-wolf woman She's as scary as hell

# Can you hear her yell?

# She-wolf woman... #

Is this the house?

Yes. Fantastic, isn't it?

This house?

Yes, this one.

Er...Immie?!

She seems keen!

Jack!

Jack, what is going on?!

Shhh! I've got some mates round!

Cheers.

Who was that?

Er... Liam, or Luke...

And the money?

I rented them a room.

Am I going mental,

or have you turned our house into some kind of a knocking shop?

Wow!

I didn't think even you could stoop that low.

Oh, there you are!

Why did you run off?

Why don't you ask the guy that's running this place, my brother?

Your...

your brother?

-Yeah.

-I...

I didn't know.

I gathered that.

Jack, meet Cillian.

What?

This is Cillian?

You two were coming here...?

My own sister? That is disgusting!

I don't think you're in a position to judge anyone right now!

For your information, he said this was his friend's gorgeous pad,

not my brother's grubby little brothel!

He told me on the phone it was classy.

Your "friend" here told you that, did he?

You know as much about romance as Jack the Ripper.

-I didn't think it would be like this!

-Get lost, pervert.

Oh, Imogen.

I said go!

Hold on, you need to pay up.

What?

I had to turn customers away.

I'll just...

Right.

Seems like a nice enough bloke.

# She-wolf woman

# She-wolf woman... #

Ow!

# She-wolf woman... #

Jimmi!

Jimmi...!

Hey, Jimmi, you don't know what you've missed!

Julia has pulled Pete Perkin!

Pete Power.

Best time ever.

Ever!

Hey, did you come to sing with Pete whatshisname?

-What?

-Yeah!

-Yeah!

-You're good!

You'll be great!

# She-wolf woman

# She-wolf woman... #

-Pete!

-Hey!

Pity you didn't make it earlier, it was a blinder.

Sorry I missed it. What are you doing?

It's a no-go.

-My doctor called earlier.

-And?

Got the test results.

Bit grim, I'm afraid.

We're talking liver transplant.

Look, it doesn't have to be as bad as you think.

There's a 90% chance of survival after the first year.

76% after the first five.

-Nah, I don't want to go through all that.

-Why not?

Being an invalid is just not me.

I've got my image to worry about, right?

Don't you want to live?

Yes, but it's about quality of life.

I don't want to exist.

I want to live like I did tonight - out on stage, belting it out.

-That's living.

-You might feel different in the morning.

No, I won't. I know who I am and I'm happy with it.

Anyway, it's not all bad news.

Why's that?

There was an agent in the audience, convinced the band has a big future.

Doesn't do any harm.

Not bad-looking either.

This is what it's all about.

I'm going out on a high.

You're not getting the situation. There's no harm in any of this.

Really?

There's no prostitution, if that's what you're worried about,

just students looking for somewhere a bit quieter than a room on campus.

Right, and, er...

what would Mum and Dad think of this?

They won't find out - it's totally hush-hush.

I wouldn't bank on that.

Hang on, you don't understand, I'm doing them a massive favour.

Yeah, right!

With the boatload of money I'm raking in from this place,

they won't have to support me at uni.

How very thoughtful of you(!)

I can pull a grand a week.

As if!

Then, what do you think all this is?

So, we're cool?

Nice try.

No, just...

I'm sure that we can come to some sort of arrangement.

Make a deal. Yeah?

OK.

I want the big room when we move in.

OK, done.

Phone.

And a cut of the takings.

I'm serious.

80/20.

70/30.

60/40.

I should cocoa!

-How much?

-50 quid.

It is only a small room.

If you google "mutton dressed as lamb", you'll get a picture of me.

Don't be silly.

I'm staying in here for the rest of my life.

You've got a basic misunderstanding of immersion therapy.

Open.

Mmm!

Oh, I'd forgotten how good chocolate is.

Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd