No Fool Like an Old Fool Doctors

COMPUTER DINGS

Since the day you walked into the church, I've been captivated.

I see in you a kind, wise and quite lovely woman.

The time we've spent together has been precious to me

and I would like, more than anything...

When my wife died, I thought I'd never find happiness again.

I was reconciled to being alone for the rest of my life.

Then I met you.

Will you make me the happiest man?

Will you marry me?

No.

What?

You started off very well.

But when you spoke of the late Mrs Searl - may she rest in peace -

it sounded like you wanted a replacement wife.

Oh, no. That's not what I meant at all.

And believe me, that is the last thing Miss Boyd wants to hear.

Now, shall we try again?

I've taken up enough of your time.

No, I'm happy to help.

I hold you both in very high regard.

This one is new.

He shows a lot of promise. Do you like it?

Well, yes. I like the frame very much.

Now. We have...

..57 pictures for the children's art exhibition.

We will arrange them in the hall next Friday.

-Are you available?

-Of course.

It is very good of you to give up your time.

It's something I have plenty of now.

I must say, retirement really agrees with you.

You are looking very well.

Have you done something different with your hair?

No. It's a mess.

There is something different about you.

I can't think what.

You have a glow.

SHE LAUGHS

Oh, please.

I have been noticing it more and more.

Am I right in thinking that someone is making you happy?

You could be.

A gentleman, perhaps?

You not eating?

No, I'm not hungry.

You watching your weight?

Surely not. You don't need to go on a diet.

PHONE RINGS

Hello. Yeah. Yeah, I am. Are you?

Good afternoon.

Is it?

Chris.

I'm sorry, he's having a difficult time at the moment.

We are all worried about Nurse Marquez.

OK. Yeah. Bye.

Guess what? I've got a date with Rob.

Great.

Oh, look at my nails.

Do you think I've got time to pop out?

Well...

What a nice surprise!

-I'm not interrupting anything?

-No, I'm glad you are here.

I don't know what's wrong with me, I can't seem to concentrate.

Jessica, can I talk to you?

Are you all right?

Yes. Well, I hope so.

-You see...the reason I'm here...

-Yes?

Since the day you walked into the church, I've been captivated.

I see in you a kind, wise and quite lovely woman.

Thank you, Brian.

The time we've spent together has been precious to me

and I would like, more than anything,

to spend the rest of my life with you.

Jessica, will you make me the happiest man?

-Will you marry me?

-Please, get up.

-No, I...

-I'm sorry, Brian. I can't marry you.

Oh...

Do you want a glass of water?

-I'm just going to get a glass of water.

-Yes.

I know. I'm sorry. I didn't realise the time.

That is not a good reason. What were you thinking of?

I was thinking of my date with Rob.

I just want it to go well.

It will be fine.

You and Sergeant Hollins belong together.

That's what everybody says,

just because they know us as a couple.

I am not everybody.

Besides, I know when two people are right for each other.

See you in a week, then, to change the dressing. Take care.

LAUGHTER

You are a dear, dear friend, Brian.

But if I gave you the idea that I wanted more than friendship,

then I'm-I'm sorry.

No. No, I'm sorry.

I've embarrassed you.

No, I'm not embarrassed.

-Well, I am.

-Don't be.

You're a wonderful man and you have so much to offer.

But marriage just isn't something that I'm interested in.

It never was.

But you're too lovely to be on your own.

I don't see it that way.

I've got my life the way I want it.

You sure about that?

Oh, yeah.

MUFFLED SCREAM

Promise not to scream?

I'm not going to hurt you.

Please, I don't have any money. Please.

I don't want your money...Jessica.

I've dreamt about this for so long.

Yes. Yes, I will let the doctor know, Mrs Fraser. Good day.

Miss Teale, can you please do that on your own time?

Dr Searl.

Retired.

Good news?

Actually, no.

You did not ask her?

I didn't get the chance.

She saw where it was going and rejected me before I got there.

Do not be discouraged.

Maybe she needs time to think about it.

-I could go and have...

-No. Please.

I just wanted to let you know and thank you for your help.

You hung on?

I've been training.

Getting stronger.

Keeping my eye out for a chance.

I couldn't wait another five years. Seeing you. Wanting you.

-Not being able to touch...

-HE GROANS

-Are you all right?

-I'm fine. I'm fine.

I think I've done something to my shoulder.

-Let me see.

-I can't move my arm.

It's OK. It'll wait.

I did it. I really did it, Jess.

I'm here with you. This is great. This is...

Darren, what if you get caught? They'll be looking for you.

They won't come for ages yet.

We've got time alone together, Jess. Just you and me.

You hung my painting up, didn't you?

Am I the teacher's pet, am I?

I've been thinking about you day and night, you know?

Do you still feel the same?

You know I do.

I know I've heard you say it so many times...

but I just can't believe it.

Help me.

You're hurt, we have to...

I'm fine. I need to make plans and get away.

OK, but first things first...

..can you put these in the washing machine for me?

I need to get a shower.

Top of the stairs.

KNOCK AT DOOR

About the other day.

I don't want to talk about it.

Heston phoned. They're having drinks at the Icon later.

-I thought you were going to the spa for the weekend?

-I am.

I was just passing it on.

When are you leaving?

Straight after work.

-When are you back? Sunday?

-Yeah.

Early evening. Why?

You going to have something nice for me to eat on the table?

I could do.

I don't like leaving you on your own.

Mum, please.

I know you're worried about Mandy...

It's fine, I can go and see her at the weekend.

Oh.

OK. Good.

Mum.

Enjoy your weekend.

Thanks.

I could do with some help getting dried.

HE GROANS

You really are in pain.

It's nothing I can't handle.

You're shaking.

I'm... I'm just, um, a bit...

This is all so...

The bedroom's upstairs.

HE SCREAMS

Darren!

Dr Reid, can I ask your opinion on something?

Yes, do you want to go to my room?

No, no, it is nothing like that.

But do you think it is possible,

if a woman rejects a marriage proposal,

she might accept it later?

I'm sure it is.

Especially if the proposal comes as a bit of a surprise for the woman.

She might need time to think about it.

And the man should not be discouraged at the initial rejection.

Is that what you are trying to say?

Yes, I suppose.

Well...thank you, Dr Reid. No, that was very helpful.

Good, I'm glad, Mrs Tembe.

Thank you for coming. It's his shoulder.

He can't move for the pain.

-Darren, darling, the doctor's here.

-No.

Yes. He's a friend. It's OK. He's going to help you.

You didn't think to call for an ambulance?

I did, but he wouldn't let me.

I'm sorry, there's nothing I can really do for the man.

Please, Brian.

I had no-one else to turn to.

All right. Darren, is it?

Can you try and sit forward for me?

Can you tell me what happened?

He-he said he fell off a ladder.

He's a-a model. He's been sitting for me.

Oh, please.

Can you move your arm at all?

I think you've dislocated your shoulder. You need to go to A&E.

-BOTH:

-No.

He can't do that.

Why not?

He doesn't like hospitals.

Then I'm afraid there's really nothing I can do.

There must be.

Not here. It's too dangerous in case there's a fracture.

And we won't know that without an X-ray.

No hospitals. No.

-(Look, what's going on?)

-Don't ask me to explain.

-Are you and him...

-It's complicated.

I see.

I'm sorry to put you in this position, Brian.

But you did say if I ever needed your...

I know what I said.

Well, I need you now. Please.

HE SCREAMS

It's all right, Darren. It's all right.

BONE CRACKS

There.

It's all done. It's all done.

Can you move your arm?

You should be fine. Make sure you keep moving it.

You can take some co-codamol for the next few days.

Thank you.

You did well.

I've never seen that done before without pain relief.

It's the bravest thing I ever saw.

I'll see myself out.

You won't tell anyone about this, will you?

Thank you, Brian. And...I'm really sorry.

-I need to get out of here.

-And go where?

Amsterdam. I've got people there. Money stashed.

-But you...

-He's going to tell someone soon.

No, no, no, he won't. He won't. I trust him.

Because you're too trusting by far.

I know I have to let you go,

but to lose you again so soon...

What are you talking about?

I'm not going anywhere without you.

Whoa!

-Steady.

-Sorry.

-OK.

He's keen.

I must say, Sergeant Hollins, you look very smart.

Thank you.

I haven't got too much aftershave on, have I?

To be honest, I have never seen the need for it.

I expect Miss Teale is the type to like that sort of thing.

-Hey.

-Hey.

-You look nice.

-Thank you. You smell nice.

-I booked a table.

-Good.

-Ordered a taxi.

-Good.

You two have a lovely evening.

You make sure you have her home at a reasonable hour, young man.

Don't worry. I will look good care of her.

WOMAN ON RADIO: That was our correspondent,

live outside the House of Commons.

The government is expected to make an announcement later in the week.

A report has just come in that a man has escaped from Oakfield Prison

in the West Midlands.

Darren Floyd, 42, is serving a ten-year sentence for armed robbery.

He is 5"11' eleven with a shaved head

and a tattoo of a serpent on his neck.

DOORBELL RINGS

It's someone form the church. I'll get rid of her.

Careful. Careful. Just... OK.

Stay there.

Mrs Tembe.

I thought you could do with a friend to talk to.

I have been speaking to Dr Searl.

Well, he has been confiding in me.

I do not mean to intrude,

but I urge you not to make your decision final.

I'm sorry, look, this isn't a good time.

I am sorry. I will not keep you any longer. Good day.

Mrs Tembe.

-Dr Searl, what on earth are you doing here?

-Get in.

I have just been to see Miss Boyd.

I am sorry to have to tell you this,

but I think it is important that you know.

I think there is another man.

There is. But it's much more serious than that.

Do you like my nails?

Very nice.

They're amazing.

You're wearing your eternity ring?

It's beautiful.

Have you decided yet?

What?

-What you're going to have?

-Oh.

Red pepper coulis. What's that when it's at home?

A thick sauce.

Why don't they just say that, then? When did menus get so complicated?

And look at this. "Fennel Veloute."

Velout-AY.

-What's that?

-It's a velvety sauce. It's French.

And what's a fennel?

HE CHUCKLES

It's a vegetable.

It's sort of liquorice-y.

You know a lot about food, don't you?

Well, you are looking at a SuperChef winner.

You do know what SuperChef is?

You were on the telly?

I was indeed.

-Wow.

-Nah, it was only local.

But guess who I was up against.

Mrs Tembe.

-And did you win?

-Yeah.

-Wow.

Well, actually, it was you that got me involved in it

in the first place.

Then I hired our Jack as a sous chef.

Actually, he got disqualified because he'd cut his finger...

Sorry. Boring.

-We need to call the police.

-I don't think we should do that.

Get her away from that man as soon as possible.

And get her charged with harbouring a criminal?

But she is being held against her will.

Oh, no, she isn't.

From what I could see they were clearly...

together.

Surely not?

It explains a lot. All the secrecy.

All the time she spent with me, that's all it was.

Just passing the time.

I knew she taught at the prison, but I never imagined for a second...

I think she is just a lonely woman who is looking for romance.

She's got herself mixed up in something

and now she is out of her depth.

So she needs our help.

Yes, so what do you have in mind?

I don't know.

I don't know.

HE BREATHES DEEPLY

Who wants it, then?

It's good, really, isn't it? You can sit in silence with someone.

Although that's a first, coming from motormouth Karen.

No, sorry. That sounded really...

No, no, it's...

-How's your...?

-Oh, it's good.

-How's your...?

-Nice. Nice.

My Auntie Ag is going to come and stay for a few days.

Auntie Ag?

She's my mum's sister.

Obviously, you won't remember her,

but she wants to come and see you, if that's all right?

Yeah, course. What's she like?

Oh.

Yeah... Yeah.

Getting older, but still going strong.

She never married. Was engaged once, but he died.

Oh, no. Oh, the poor thing.

She sounds sweet.

Yeah, yeah. She...

She has her moments.

So it's all there, yeah?

We don't want any trouble, do we?

OK, yeah. As long as it's all there.

I'll count it. Just to make sure.

All right, see you in a bit.

Did you sort the money?

I can only get £200 a day on each card.

-How many cards?

-Just two.

400. That should get us there.

Listen, Darren...

You're not having doubts, are you?

No, no, of course not. But I can't just disappear.

I think you should go and I can follow on a bit later.

-No way.

-In a week. Two weeks?

Give me time to come up with a story, tie things up here,

or people will be asking questions...

No! OK.

I can't drive the car, OK? I need you with me.

Besides, if there's two of us it won't look suspicious.

Now, just give us the cards... DOORBELL RINGS

-..there's a good girl.

-Yes.

Mrs Tembe, I told you this isn't a good time.

This will take no time at all.

I forgot to give you my recipe for Chicken Jambalaya.

It's not important.

All you need is two chicken breasts, skin removed.

Two onions...finely chopped.

Oh, I am sorry. I did not know you had company.

I am Mrs Tembe.

I think I have seen your face at church, am I right?

No, I don't think so.

I'm sorry for interrupting.

We can finish this another time.

Come on, come on, please.

THEY SHOUT

Right, then. Who's next?!

Me.

Come on, then, boy. Let's see what you've got.

Come on!

-Thank you.

-Thanks.

And so the Chief Super has offered me a new post.

That's good.

CID. That's Criminal Investigation Department.

I know what CID is.

Sorry. But the thing is...

MUSIC: "Brown Eyed Girl" by Van Morrison

..the job is in Leamington Spa.

You hear that? Brown Eyed Girl.

-I remember.

-Karaoke party. Our anniversary.

I sang it. Embarrassed the kids but you loved it.

No, no. I went to see Van Morrison. Thank you. Me and Maggie.

We were waiting for him to sing Brown Eyed Girl, and he never.

Then he went off.

And we were clapping and cheering till he came back on. And guess what?

-He sang it.

-Yeah, it was amazing. The crowd, the atmosphere.

-The whole thing was...

-Amazing.

Yeah.

Do you think I should take it? The job?

That's up to you.

Is that all you're going to say?

Sorry, I should say congratulations.

No, no, there's no need because I'm not taking it.

Oh.

Do you fancy a dessert?

I can't stand this. The thought of her in there with him.

I think we should call the police.

No. Give her some more time. Please.

I pray she sees sense.

She will. She's a good woman.

Wait.

Oh, no.

No. No, I am sorry. We need to call the police.

SIREN SOUNDS

-Darren, stop!

-Jessica!

Are you all right? Did he hurt you?

No, no, I'm fine.

You! I told you not to trust her.

-It was me that called them, Darren.

-What?

I'm so sorry, I had to.

Couldn't handle a real man, eh? You dried up old bag!

Shut up.

Get off.

I've been such a fool.

I don't know what you must think of me.

All that matters is that you're all right.

You did the right thing.

Thank you.

Both of you.

Madam, you must come with me.

You're not taking her in. She's a victim.

-It's thanks to her...

-It's all right, Brian.

I'll need to make a statement.

What are you waiting for?

No argument. I'm coming with you.

You are aware, I assume, of what's happening today?

Auntie Ag?

There's something you remember.

Graffiti removal is a highly specialised process.

Get a move on.

Who was that?

Karen. She's asked us round to lunch.

If you think you can wriggle your way out of this, you are mistaken.

Hello, Karen, love.

You smell...

Here we go.